Geek Punditry

Geek Punditry #106: Spoiler Alert

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This time it’s Squid Game’s fault. The most popular Netflix series on the planet dropped a second season a few weeks ago, right in the middle of the break between semesters for most schools, so approximately seventeen bajillion people binged the entire thing before they went back. Of all the human beings on the planet Earth, according to my meticulous records accrued by reading social media posts, the only one who has not watched the entirety of Squid Game season two is some schlub named Blake M. Petit in Louisiana. In my defense, I’ve got other things occupying my attention. In December, I mostly watch Christmas movies until the 26th, at which point I try to spend the next week catching up on movies I missed that year. Then on Jan. 1, I began my Year of Superman project, so while I certainly WANT to watch Squid Game, I simply haven’t gotten around to it yet. 

Spoiler: The real Squid Game is the friends we made along the way. Who then get shot in the head.

This does not stop my students, of course, and when we returned from the Christmas break on Monday, I found myself several times having to stop them from babbling everything that happened in the show that I haven’t watched yet. I ask you to remember, now, that this is season two. This is a season that dropped mere days ago, not months or years, but several of them walked into the room wanting to tell me all about it, despite my admonitions NOT to do so. And I think it’s time, once again, to talk about spoilers.

I’ve seen the studies that say that some people PREFER to be spoiled – that knowing beforehand what happens in a story reduces their anxiety and allows them to enjoy the story better. Speaking as somebody who lives with anxiety as a constant companion that I wish I could jettison out of my brain and into outer space, I can only call this theory utter balderdash. It makes no sense to me AT ALL. I cannot, for the life of me, fathom how it feels BETTER to know that Rosebud was his mother’s maiden name, that Jack Dawson makes it onto the door, or that Captain America dies from using the Infinity Gauntlet before you actually see it. I get far more anxiety from being AFRAID of getting spoiled than I EVER have from wondering what will happen in the story next.

However, I’m also mature enough to accept that no two brains work the same way, and that while the messed-up hunk of meat in MY skull is absolutely spoiler-adverse, that doesn’t mean that people who prefer spoilers aren’t real. I get that. I don’t UNDERSTAND it, but I GET it. However, the fact that people watch and enjoy things differently from one another makes for an even BETTER reason to avoid spoilers, not a WORSE one. You see, if a person WANTS spoilers for virtually anything – a movie, a book, a TV show – they are readily available. They can be found in just seconds on Google, or if you want to get absolutely insane fake spoilers like I wrote in the preceding paragraph, you can get them on ChatGPT. Those who want to be spoiled can easily alleviate their anxiety. But for those of us who DON’T want spoilers, someone throwing them around casually is a severe blow to our enjoyment of whatever story you guys are out to ruin for us.

“But you know, Blake,” some of you say, “If the spoiler ruins the story, then it wasn’t really a good story in the first place.” I have heard this from many people, many times. I have also heard people say that thin crust pizza is better than thick crust. All of these people are – and here I’m going to use a somewhat complicated literary term, so I apologize in advance if you don’t quite get where I’m coming from – full of horseshit. 

Writers construct stories in a certain way. They create characters, select conflict, craft a setting, all to generate a certain effect in the reader or viewer. All of these things are tools in a vast and complicated toolbox, and one of those tools is the power of the reveal. Take something like The Sixth Sense, for example. I’m going to spoil it now, and I’m warning you in advance because that’s the decent thing to do, but I also know that it’s a relatively old and very well-known movie, so I’m not TOO worried about ruining it for anybody. Still, if you don’t know what happens, here’s your last chance to bow out.

“And they keep calling Chicago Style ‘casserole’.”
“What, do they think that’s an insult or something?”
“I guess.”

In this movie, a psychologist played by Bruce Willis attempts to help a boy played by Haley Joel Osment who believes he can see ghosts. Most of the movie focuses on Willis’s character as he tries to steer Osment through this bizarre ability of his and lead him to making peace with his strange power in the moments before the final revelation at the end – that Willis himself is a ghost, although he didn’t know it. 

It was a great moment, a fantastic surprise that not only made the movie exciting, but made viewers want to go back and watch it again to look for the many clues they missed the first time around. There’s a scene, for instance, where Willis is at dinner with his wife, talking to her as she grows frustrated and walks out on him. On first viewing, it seems as though she’s angry at him and is refusing to have a conversation, but watching it later it becomes clear that she can’t see or hear him, and what the audience thought was anger over his frequent absences is actually grief over his death. Once you realize that, you realize that NOBODY other than Osment’s character ever directly talks to or interacts with Willis in the entire film, a realization that is far more meaningful and rewarding the second time you watch it…IF you didn’t get it the first time.

Although writer/director M. Night Shyamalan has become something of a punchline in later years for an overreliance on twist endings like this one, this is the movie that made his career, and it was a hit for a reason. But if you go into the movie knowing that Willis is a ghost, you lose that shock at the end and, instead, spend the movie picking apart the little clues that are only intended to be significant in retrospect. 

What’s really weird is that Moonlighting had the same twist, but nobody ever caught on.

Or, to put it more simply, if a writer chooses to use a reveal in a story, they are doing so for a purpose. If that reveal is spoiled, you are both robbing the writer of the right to tell the story as they intend AND robbing the audience of the ability to enjoy the story as the writer wanted them to. Saying that if a spoiler ruins a story then it wasn’t a good story is like saying that if you make a pizza without sauce and it doesn’t taste right that means it wasn’t a good pizza. Maybe not, but if COULD have been if you hadn’t LEFT OUT A VITAL INGREDIENT.

What I’m getting down to is that avoiding spoilers should be a simple matter of common courtesy. If you want to get spoiled, you can. Fine. Go nuts. As I always say, it’s your life and you have the right to enjoy things the way you want, and my feelings about it should have no dominion over your own. However, when you throw around spoilers on social media or in a crowded room, you’re taking that same right away from other people. Not being able to go to the movies very often – especially to see R-rated movies – I knew I would be spoiled on Deadpool and Wolverine long before I actually got to watch it, and I was right. That movie is built on several surprise moments, with cameo appearances by actors and characters who haven’t been seen in Marvel movies in years, or in at least one case, ever. But I didn’t get to see the movie until four months after it hit theaters, and every cameo in the film had been spoiled for me before I got to see it. At this point I don’t even get angry anymore, just frustrated. I still enjoyed the movie, don’t get me wrong. I just know I would have enjoyed it MORE if I DIDN’T know that Lea Thompson was going to show up to reprise her role as Beverly from Howard the Duck.

“Well that’s on you, Blake,” someone says. “You should avoid those parts of social media.” By the way, if anybody ever figures out who this person is who keeps shouting out from the back of the room to interrupt my columns, let me know. He’s a jerk. The thing is, people drop these spoilers EVERYWHERE. It’s not like I’m part of a Deadpool Group on Facebook where I expect to get barraged by this stuff. It shows up in random posts on all social media. And even if I unplugged from social media entirely, that wouldn’t save me from things like the kid who walked into my classroom the day before the second Doctor Strange movie was released and – loudly – announced who one of the unrevealed characters was. 

To his credit, when he saw how angry I was, that kid at least had the decency to apologize. 

People shouldn’t have to spend their entire lives like Keanu Reeves in bullet time, twisting and contorting in midair to avoid having things ruined for them. Common courtesy should dictate that spoilers be restricted to a time and place where they are expected and welcome. 

Pictured: Logging on to Facebook the week any given Marvel movie is released.

All that said, there IS a statute of limitations here. People use common experiences – such as stories – as a shared reference point just as a basic element of communication. We aren’t quite as bad as the aliens on that one episode of Star Trek that communicated 100 percent via metaphor (the “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra” episode – even if you don’t watch Trek, I guarantee you’ve heard the reference online), but we DO use our common experiences, including story, to relate to one another. Eventually, any story that is sufficiently popular enters the sphere of public knowledge, and it’s no longer reasonable to expect to remain spoiler-free. Another example from school – a few days ago my English class was discussing the way artificial intelligence is depicted in the media, and the movie The Matrix came up. I started to hem and haw a little bit, trying to talk about the movie without giving away anything important, until one of my students said, “Mr. Petit, that movie is 25 years old.” I thanked her for making me feel like Methuselah, but her point was well-made, and after that I stopped worrying about ruining the movie and just talked about it. The conversation went much better after that. 

But again, this is a movie that was released a quarter of a century ago. (If I have to feel like an old man when I think about The Matrix, so does everybody else.) I would never have done this with a movie that came out last year, let alone last month. And even if the movie WAS old, I wouldn’t do it if somebody had asked me not to.

What I’m calling for, my friends, is simple courtesy. If you don’t mind spoilers, fine. That’s your prerogative. But that doesn’t give you the right to ruin things for people who DO. Think before you spoiler. And the newer a movie or TV show is, think even harder. 

And here’s hoping I get around to season two of Squid Game before one of these kids ruins season three for me.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. In case you didn’t catch the joke, all of the spoilers he dropped in this column (except for the Sixth Sense example) were fake. Lea Thompson wasn’t in Deadpool and Wolverine. It was Lady Gaga.

Year of Superman Week One: Early Versions and Meetings With a Dark Knight

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Welcome to the first week of my grand “Year of Superman” experiment. Over the next 12 months, I’m going to do my best to read, watch, or listen to at least one piece of Superman-related media every day. As I go along, I’ll keep a journal of each day’s entries as well as thoughts on some of the stories I’ve read or watched, then I’ll try to share them here with you on Wednesdays. Please keep in mind that my thoughts on these pieces of Superman history are likely to contain spoilers, so if there’s anything you’re trying to remain spoiler-free on, you may want to skip that specific entry. 

As the year began, I wanted to focus a bit on the earliest days of Superman. I read the first Superman story as it appeared in the first two issues of Action Comics (and thank goodness for the DC Universe Infinity app for making that possible). I also read Gladiator, the 1930 novel that many people believe was a direct influence on Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster when they created Superman. And I re-watched the movie that started my love affair with Superman, the first Christopher Reeve movie from 1978, directed by Richard Donner. Here, then, are my thoughts on Week 1 of the Year of Superman.

Wed., Jan. 1

Comics: Action Comics #1, 2, 1079

Notes: (On Action #1, 2) The embryonic Superman is so different from who he eventually becomes. He’s snarkier than usual, and much more ruthless, doing things like throwing an abusive husband against a wall, carrying a man along electrical poles, and forcing a munitions manufacturer to join the army and put his own life at stake. But even here, with methods that would seem very out of place in today’s stories, the moral core is there — a steadfast belief that, as Mark Waid wrote sixty years later in Kingdom Come, “There is a right and a wrong in the universe, and that distinction is not difficult to make.” The real world, of course, is infinitely more complicated than that, and there are a great many times when it IS difficult to figure out the right thing to do for mere mortals like you and me, but Superman doesn’t — and shouldn’t — have that problem. 

Thur., Jan. 2

Movie: Superman (1978)

Notes: The 1978 film with Christopher Reeve will always be the gold standard, won’t it? The tagline was “You’ll believe a man can fly,” but that’s hardly the most impressive thing about the movie. In his performance, Reeve created a Superman that was warm, compassionate, and kind, all of which are things that we need even more today than when this movie was first made. This movie still has one of my single favorite moments in film history: the part where Lois falls from a helicopter. Superman reveals himself to Metropolis for the first time, gliding into the air and catching her in one hand and the helicopter in the other. He places them both on the roof of the Daily Planet building and Lois, in her shock, asks him, “Who are you?” 

His reply is simple, elegant, and perfect: “A friend.”

And although my steadfast belief is and will remain that Clark Kent is the real person, that Superman is just another name that he uses and that the reason he is the greatest hero in the world is because of the upbringing of Jonathan and Martha Kent…despite that, there is a moment in this movie that shows Jor-El knew who his son was destined to be as well. The line in the Fortress of Solitude, during the tutelage montage: “They can be a great people, Kal-El, they wish to be. They lack only the light to show them the way.”  

That’s who Superman is. They knew it in 1978. And if nothing else with this little experiment, I hope to remind people of that today. 

Comics: Black Canary: Best of the Best #1 (Lois, Clark, and Krypto cameo), Superman/Fantastic Four, Absolute Superman #3, Incredible Hulk Vs. Superman

Notes: (On Absolute Superman #3) Young Kal-El refuses to use generative AI to write. Further evidence that he’s the greatest hero there is.

Fri., Jan. 3

Omnibus: DC Versus Marvel Omnibus

Comics: Detective Comics #1091 (Guest appearance), Action Comics #1080

Notes: (On Detective #1091) A surprisingly Superman-relevant guest spot in this issue. Batman has been offered an experimental medical treatment with the potential to greatly increase his lifespan, so he does something he very rarely does: he turns to Superman for advice. Assorted comics over the years have established that Superman ages very slowly and is, compared to the humans around him, functionally immortal, but it’s not something they talk about much in the mainstream comics. Writer Tom Taylor brings that to the forefront with a lovely speech about how Clark carries that knowledge, with an emphasis on the fact that he trusts Bruce Wayne to find a way to use this gift for the greatest good. Frank Miller was wrong. The world is better when Superman and Batman are friends. 

Movie: Music by John Williams (Documentary, includes segment on Superman ’78)

Sat. Jan. 4

Novel: Gladiator (1930) by Philip Wylie

Notes: In the late 19th century, a reclusive scientist develops a treatment that gives incredible power to his unborn son. As the child, Hugo Danner, grows to manhood, he develops remarkable strength and speed, finds himself impervious to injury, and must then go out into the world to discover what place – if any – he will have in it.

This is the first time I’ve read this book, although I’ve long heard it cited as being a likely inspiration for Superman. Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster – to my knowledge – never confirmed that this book was on their minds when they were conceiving the character, but the similarities are too striking to ignore. Hugo Danner’s powers are virtually the same as those of Superman in the early days, before he developed flight or super-senses or some of the more outlandish abilities he has today. What’s more, the sort of ethical struggles he faces are virtual mirrors of those that later writers would apply to the man of steel. Hugo is a one-of-a-kind human being, Clark Kent is a last-of-his-kind alien. Hugo has to learn lessons about the danger of his powers, if they go unchecked, which is a lesson that we frequently see in Superman origin stories. Hugo has to deal with the fact that, despite all of his power, there are some things in the world he simply cannot change, which of course is a typical theme in Superman’s stories.

What really sets things apart is how the two characters deal with the circumstances of their lives. In many ways, the way Wylie develops Hugo Danner is the opposite of what happens with Superman. As Clark learns to believe in and have faith in humanity, Hugo finds himself growing increasingly cynical and bitter as the story goes on. Clark transforms himself into a hero, but Hugo has thoughts of anger and rage that, at times, tread the line of outright villainy. We’ve seen so many stories with “evil” versions of Superman in recent years – things like The Boys or Irredeemable, which show the consequences of a character with Superman-like power but without the Superman ethos. The odd thing about Gladiator is that it feels very much like it could have served as an origin story for Homelander or Plutonian, rather than our own Superman.

I’m impressed by the writing style in some ways. Wylie is sharper and snappier, less consumed with fluff than other writers of his time, and the book is a very easy read. That said, “easy” doesn’t always mean “pleasant.” The book is a novel only in the technical definition of the term. There’s no singular antagonist, save perhaps for Hugo’s powers themselves, and there’s not a singular plot, either. Rather, we get the story of Hugo’s life, from his childhood, to his college years, to his exploits during World War I, and then beyond. We don’t get cohesion, except for a throughline of seeing how the world wears him down to the point of turning against humanity as a whole. The end of the book is particularly unsatisfying – it seems as though Wylie felt like he’d said everything he had to say and then found a quick (and, frankly, unbelievable) way to end things without actually having to resolve the ethical questions he’d addressed in the book.

It’s interesting, particularly from a historical standpoint, to see this prototypical Superman, but I’m very glad that the writers who helped turn Clark Kent into the hero he is didn’t draw quite as much from this early version as they might have.

Comic: DC Vs. Vampires: World War V #5 (Supergirl appearance)

Article: “Superman’s Editor Mort Weisinger” by Will Murray, essay in The Krypton Companion

Sun, Jan. 5 

Graphic Novel: Superman: Dark Knight Over Metropolis. (Collects Action Comics Annual #1, Adventures of Superman #466, Action Comics #653, Superman Vol. 2 #44, Adventures of Superman #467, Action Comics #654.)

Notes: Having read the scene in Detective Comics #1091 a few days ago, today I decided to go back to one of the early encounters between Superman and Batman in the post-Crisis continuity. The 90s was the era when I got into Superman comics big-time, the era that I still feel represents some of the best storytelling the character has ever had, and it’s always fun to revisit it. Oddly, one of the few things I’m NOT crazy about is the somewhat antagonistic relationship between Superman and Batman at the time. In this story, a former employee of Lex Luthor who has found evidence that Clark Kent is Superman confronts him with the knowledge, as well as Luthor’s Kryptonite ring. She flees and is murdered, and the ring makes its way to Gotham City and Batman, who comes to Metropolis to unravel the mystery.

The story is solid – Dan Jurgens, Jerry Ordway, and Roger Stern were the writers of the three Superman books at the time and they had already seamlessly forged the flow that would come to define what we now call the “Triangle Era” of Superman, with the story moving from one title and creative team to another seamlessly. It still jars me to see a Superman and Batman that don’t quite get along and constantly question one another’s methods. On the other hand, this book DOES start to forge a respect between the two of them. The two of them recognize that their respective methods work for their respective cities. Most importantly, at the end of the story Clark visits Bruce in Gotham, giving him the Kryptonite ring with the reasoning that he’s worried that someday someone may take control of him and turn him against humankind, and if that ever happens he wants the only sure way to stop him to be in the hands of someone he trusts. It would be some time before Superman and Batman regained the Super BFF status that they enjoyed in the Silver and Bronze ages, but I feel like it began here.

Also of note, the issues collected in this graphic novel include a bit of a relationship upgrade for Lois and Clark, who had flirted (literally and figuratively) with being a couple for some time. In these issues, Clark pushes to make it official. One of the many things I love about the 90s Superman is what they did with the relationship between these two. Lois Lane, when written properly, is a powerful and dynamic character in her own right, and it suits the couple much more to have this version, where she falls in love with Clark Kent BEFORE she knows he’s Superman. It’s far, far preferable to the stories of the 50s, where she’s out to trick the Man of Steel into marrying her or – failing that – revealing his secret identity. This is the genesis of MY Lois and Clark, and it’s the pairing that we still see in the comics today.

Mon., Jan. 6

Short Story: “Lucifer Over Lancaster” by Elizabeth Hand & Paul Witcover (from the 1993 anthology The Further Adventures of Superman)

Notes: It’s been ages since I read this book, full of short stories about Superman, many of them by writers you don’t usually associate with the character. This one, for example, is about a doctor who experiments with a strange alien creature that residents of his home in Lancaster begin to suspect of being the Devil himself. I have to admit, I’m not wild about this one. The story has a long diatribe about how Superman and Clark Kent are both disguises and Kal-El is the “real” personality, associating himself more with Krypton than Earth. I don’t get this take on the character at all. Granted, he’s the last son of Krypton, but in virtually every incarnation of the character, he’s sent to Earth as a baby. It just doesn’t make sense that he would identify that strongly with his alien heritage to the point of considering his other two identities secondary. The character is a little cold in this story, too, speaking to a clearly remorseful Dr. Rule with what feels like unnecessary aggression. I’ve set myself up for a long journey this year, and I suppose it’s inevitable that I’ll run across versions of Superman that don’t quite jive with me. I guess this is the first. 

TV Episode: Superman and Lois Season 1, Episode 7, “Man of Steel”

Notes: I know it’s going to shock people, but I totally missed out on Superman and Lois when it was on the air. It wasn’t deliberate. I watched the first two episodes and I enjoyed it, but then other things started to steal my attention and I just got further and further behind, always intending to come back and give it a chance. I finally made it back a few months ago, when every other Superman fan I knew was talking about how amazing the series finale was. Well, I figured, if the show is over, what better time to start binging the entire thing? I made it through the first six episodes before the end of 2024, and now that the Year of Superman is upon me, I’m getting back in with the intention of getting through the rest of the show this year.

Anyway, in this episode we see Lois and Clark’s son Jordan struggling to control his newfound hearing powers, while Lois tries to unravel the mystery of this mysterious visitor called “Captain Luthor,” who seems to hail from another universe in which he and Lois were a couple and where Superman turned bad. I know a lot of people have gotten burned out on the multiverse concept in the last few years, but I’ve always been a fan of it when it’s done well. This one is pretty interesting – as Lois and Clark are certain that this stranger is an alternate version of Clark’s arch-nemesis, but as we see flashbacks to this stranger building a suit of daughter with his and Lois’s daughter “Nat,” it becomes increasingly clear (long before Lois finds his actual name) that this is REALLY an alternate of one of Clark’s greatest ALLIES, Steel.

The DC Universe Steel, John Henry Irons, has been one of my favorite Superman spinoff characters ever since his debut back in 1993 during the “Death of Superman” arc. Steel in the comics is a good man with a great mind who uses Superman as an inspiration to redeem a mistake. This John is different – just as smart, and with what seem to be good intentions, but his experience with an evil Superman has turned him into an antagonist. It’s a pretty surprising take on a character I love, but I’m not upset at all. John is opposed to Superman here, but there’s a long way to go in this series, and I feel like this character, somehow, is going to lead to a version of the John Henry Irons that I’m such a fan of.

Nobody tell me if I’m right or not. I’m looking forward to finding out for myself.  

It’s particularly nice to see Clark’s sons, especially the powerless Jonathan, get to play the cavalry in this episode. The relationship between Clark and Jonathan Kent in the comics is the best addition to the Superman mythos since he and Lois finally got married back in the 90s. This show adds a second son and changes the dynamic between the two considerably, but I’m really enjoying seeing where they go with it. 

Tue. Jan. 7

Comic: Superman #76

Notes: Having read Dark Knight Over Metropolis a few days ago, I got the idea to go back to the first story showing Superman and Batman discovering one another’s identities. Although they had been shown as partners in stories prior to 1952’s Superman #76, this is the story that showed HOW they discovered one another’s identities and…well, it’s baffling that this is the sort of storytelling they got away with in that time period. Having basically eradicated crime in Gotham City, Batman decides to take a vacation, booking a spot on a cruise ship. Meanwhile, Clark Kent is booked on that same ship because…well, because he had accrued time off. In one of those wacky coincidences, Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent are assigned one another as roommates. In an even wackier coincidence, an emergency breaks out on the ship and they both decide to change into their superhero uniforms after turning off the lights. And then, wackiest coincidence, a light shines through the porthole, revealing their true identities to one another.

It’s the most ridiculous secret identity reveal of all time, and I read Marvel’s Civil War.

The rest of the story is pretty standard 50s fodder. The two of them team up to thwart a criminal on the ship, Lois Lane happens to be along for the ride, and Superman – I swear to you, they did this kind of stuff all the time in the 1950s – convinces Batman to flirt with her as a distraction so she wouldn’t try to solve the crime herself and put herself into danger. I don’t know what’s crazier, that Superman would come up with a plan so bafflingly stupid or that the world’s greatest detective went along with it.

But I do have a soft spot for this story. I first read it when I was a kid, when I feverishly checked out the book Superman: From the 30s to the 70s from my local library over and over again, and I remember this story fondly. Does it hold up? No. But I can forgive that, as a relic of the time.

Speaking of relics, the way they depicted Lois Lane back then is mad. This is just one of many stories from the era where Superman straight-up gaslights her either to “protect her from harm” or to prevent her from getting too close to him, even though they were publicly dating. (Lois and Superman, that is, not Lois and Clark.) In fact, the last story in this issue is another Lois Lane Lovetrap, where SHE comes up with the brilliant plan to get Clark Kent to marry her friend Lorraine because…that…will make Superman…marry Lois? I know it doesn’t make any sense. I read the story two minutes ago and I can’t make it make sense. All I can say is, thank God for Margot Kidder, because she really was the blueprint for how Lois has been depicted from the 80s on, and the world is so much better for it. 

Thus ends Week One of the Year of Superman. I wanted to tell you that, although I have a list of stories I plan to revisit, it’s not nearly extensive enough to last a whole year. So I’m open for requests! Do you have a specific Superman comic book, story, or TV episode you’d like me to weigh in on? Go ahead and drop your requests in the comments!

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. 

Geek Punditry #105: 2025-My Year of Superman

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They say the holidays can bring people down. In my experience, though, it’s not the holiday itself that causes depression, it’s that other things that would upset you regardless seem even worse when they happen in the Christmas season. I was having a lousy December. My computer died unexpectedly and needed to be replaced, I had issues with other electronics, and dozens of other small things all seemed to erupt at the same time. None of them, in and of themselves, were that bad, but when bad luck stacks up it feels like multiplication, not addition. And when these things happen during that holiday stretch, the time when you’re supposed to be happy and joyous, it seems massively unfair and that makes everything that much worse. I was having a lousy December, is what I’m getting at.

Until Dec. 19.

On the second-to-last day of the school year I was having a hard time feeling anything happy or gleeful. It barely felt like Christmas was coming. Then the news came: the trailer was about to hit. THE trailer, the one I had been eagerly awaiting for…well, definitely over a year. It came out around 8 a.m. my time, which meant I couldn’t watch it because, of course, I had classes to teach. Somehow this didn’t seem to be an issue for my students. Over the next few hours kids kept coming up to me – knowing just how much I was looking forward to it – and asking me if I’d seen the trailer yet. No, I said, I haven’t. Ask me after lunch. No, I’m talking about complex sentences right now, ask me after lunch. Guys, I’ve had thirty of you in my room at all times, there has been no opportunity to watch a 2 ½ minute movie trailer, ask me after lunch.

Finally, when my lunch break started and my room was empty of students, I pulled up YouTube on the big Promethean board in the front of class. I did a search, but it wasn’t hard – it was already close to 12 million views at that point. I hit play and I stepped back.

Pictured: My classroom at 12:02 PM, Dec. 19, 2024.

And over an ice-covered waste, I heard an electric guitar begin to strum a beautifully triumphant melody.

And somehow, things were…better.

Superman matters.

Fiction matters, if I’m being completely clear. It’s stupid and dismissive to say that something is “just” a story, because stories are our entire culture. They’re our history, they’re our religions, they’re where our heroes are built, whether those heroes are sports figures or survivalists or children sent to our planet from a dying world. And it doesn’t take too long for anyone who meets me to discover that, of these stories, Superman is my favorite. I waited for ages for the first glimpse of James Gunn’s new vision of the Man of Steel, and that trailer hit every fiber of my heart just when I needed it most. Somehow, after watching it, I looked at my problems with greater perspective. The darkness surrounding me was lifting. I felt – as cheesy as it may seem – I felt hope. There had been so much talk of whether the guy who made Guardians of the Galaxy could possibly touch the right chords for Superman, but…this trailer eradicated any fears I may have had.

I think it’s the trunks. Corenswet insisted on the trunks, did you know that?

A lot of people are dismissive of Superman. “He’s too powerful,” they say. “He’s boring.” But you see, it’s not the fact of his power that makes him interesting. Superman has the power to rule the world, but instead chooses to use it to SAVE the world. That’s what makes him a fascinating character. What kind of man, if given the opportunity that Clark Kent was given, would use it altruistically? How do you make that character believable or relatable?

“He’s too old-fashioned,” the detractors say. “He’s too corny.” But again, isn’t that sort of the point? Superman is a relic of a time when people believed in one another and had faith that, in the end, good wins out. It’s true that this is a sentiment that much of the world has turned against, but that just means that we need a Superman now more than ever. 

It’s heartening to me to know that I’m not alone in this opinion. Within 48 hours of the trailer’s release on YouTube it had become the fourth most-watched trailer ever, and is currently the most-watched trailer in Warner Bros. history…and it’s worth noting that the three trailers ahead of it are the last two Avengers movies and Spider-Man: No Way Home, each of which has been gathering views for at least half a decade now. And IMBD announced this week that, according to its user survey, Superman is the most-anticipated movie of 2025. I don’t know if it’s because everyone, like me, was charged up by this trailer or if it’s just the goodwill carrying over from James Gunn’s previous movies, but I don’t care. People want to see this movie. And watching the trailer for the 37th time, as I did while writing this, it’s not hard to see why.

The trailer shows a Superman broken and beaten, calling for help…and when that help arrives, it comes in the form of his dog, Krypto. James Gunn has the guts to pull out the old “man’s best friend” trope for this movie. There’s an inherent goodness in that idea – even people who have completely given up on the human race will usually admit that dogs are, on the whole, a lot of Very Good Boys. How can you dislike anyone whose dog loves him that much? 

Tell me that’s not the face of a Good Boy.

We also see, in the trailer, Superman shielding a little girl from a monster’s attack. He is a protector. We see a child in what appears to be a warzone raise a flag bearing the S-shield and whispering Superman’s name – because he believes. 

This kid believes in Superman. EVERYBODY should believe in Superman, because SUPERMAN WOULD BELIEVE IN YOU.

This is the important thing about Superman, the thing that the people who call him boring and old-fashioned will never understand. The question, remember, is what kind of person would use the power of a god only to HELP people, and the answer to that question is “someone who BELIEVES in people.” That’s who Superman is, more than anything else: he’s someone who believes the absolute best of EVERYBODY.

And the wild thing is, HE MEANS IT.

He believes that even his worst enemy is never beyond redemption, that there is a spark of good even in the darkest soul, if only it can be fanned into a flame. When Superman fights Lex Luthor, he doesn’t react out of anger at his enemy, but instead he mourns the fact that such a brilliant mind has chosen to waste its potential on evil. He hopes every single time that someday Lex will see the light – and on more than one occasion Lex Luthor, however reluctantly, has shown that Superman is right about him. There IS good in there, buried deep. Lex has, in desperate times, used his intellect to save the world, and even if that good is just because he wants to prove that he’s better than Superman, he still has done it, and that keeps Superman’s hope alive.

I’m sure, of course, that people who choose to look hard enough can find stories that contradict my view of the character. Quentin Tarantino sure did. But that’s kind of symptomatic of having a character that has been continually published for 87 years. Of COURSE there will be different interpretations, and not all of them will be good. I’m talking about MY Superman, though, the versions of the character that mean something to ME, the ones that I turn to when I have those days where it feels like nothing will go right and the universe itself is conspiring against me and I need to remind itself that it’s not.

And so, thanks to James Gunn, I’ve decided that I’m going to make 2025 my Year of Superman.

What does that mean? Glad you asked – here’s what’s going to happen. 

For the next year, I’m going to make an effort to read, watch, or listen to something Superman-related every single day. I might not make it – I know how I get, and there are some days where I might slip up or forget, but should that happen I resolve not to beat myself up about it, because I know that Superman wouldn’t. But I’m going to TRY.

What exactly does that entail, though? Well, obviously that means comic books, movies, or TV shows featuring Superman. Either his own stories, stories where he makes a guest-appearance, stories where he serves as a member of the Justice League or Legion of Super-Heroes – any of those will count. I read the new Superman comics as they are published, and I’m going to go back this year and revisit some of my favorite stories of the past, including (but by no means limited to) things like “For the Man Who Has Everything,” “Time and Time Again,” “Panic in the Sky,” and the Death and Return of Superman saga. I’ll go back and revisit the stories that reportedly influenced James Gunn’s version of Superman, such as the graphic novels All-Star Superman and Superman For All Seasons. I will also include comics and graphic novels featuring other members of the Superman family, such as Superboy, Supergirl, Lois Lane, Jimmy Olsen, and Steel. And although it’s looking forward an entire year, I’m planning to close 2025 by reading what I consider to be the perfect “final” Superman story, Mark Waid and Alex Ross’s seminal graphic novel Kingdom Come.

This is a good start.

I’m going to watch Superman movies and TV shows. The Christopher Reeve movies, of course, but I’ll also watch the Brandon Routh film, the Henry Cavill movies, the Fleischer animated shorts, and the DC animated films. I’ll go back to the original movie serial starring Kirk Alyn, the first ever Superman on film. And I’ll try to visit all of the TV versions of Superman as well – George Reeves, Gerard Christopher & John Newton’s Superboy series, Dean Cain, Tom Welling, and Tyler Hoechlin. I certainly won’t have time to binge all of those shows, but I’ll try to watch at least a little of each – and I WILL spend this year finally finishing the Superman and Lois series.

I feel like this picture needs more spit-curls.

And books, of course. There are novels about Superman, some written by comic luminaries like Elliot S. Maggin and Roger Stern, others written by writers who would be less-familiar to comic book readers. I’ll work as many of them into my reading rotation as possible.

But that’s not all. I’m not only going to explore media starring Superman. I’ll also delve into things ABOUT Superman: books like Superman and Philosophy, Grant Morrison’s Supergods, or the recent Christopher Reeve documentary. I’ll listen to podcasts about Superman, such as my pal Michael Bailey’s “It All Comes Back to Superman.” I’ll read about Superman’s history and influence.

And I’m going one step further: I’ll also include those stories that are influences ON Superman. For example, I’ve already begun reading Philip Wylie’s 1930 novel Gladiator, about a young man whose scientist father experiments on him, giving him remarkable strength and speed and then urging the boy to use his powers for good. Is there any wonder that many people believe Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster had this in mind when they created the man of steel? And in the comics, Clark Kent has told Lois Lane that his favorite movie is To Kill a Mockingbird, so I’m going to throw that movie into my Year of Superman rotation, as well as the original novel, to see where the DNA of Harper Lee’s work has intertwined with that of Siegel and Shuster. I’ll look for more such examples as the year goes on, and I’ll certainly welcome suggestions. 

You put these two together and you basically get Superman.

I’ll keep a daily journal of what Superman media I enjoyed that day, and each week I’ll write a quick wrap-up of that week in my Year of Superman, telling you what I read or watched and what some of the best “Superman moments” in that week were. Don’t worry, I’ll make that a separate post from the usual Geek Punditry, so those of you who aren’t interested will still have other, non-Super babbling from me as well. It’ll probably be on Wednesdays, since that’s when the year began this time around. Each week I’ll tell you what I watched or read, with whatever notes or thoughts feel appropriate.

Thoughts like, “I KNOW I have two dozen Superman shirts, but I don’t have THAT one.”

And of course, the centerpiece of this whole experiment will come on July 11th, when the new Superman movie comes out. I’m excited to see it, of course. I think that much is abundantly clear. But perhaps even more importantly, I want to take my son Eddie to see the movie with me. I want him to understand how much this means to me. And while I don’t want to ever force him to be into the things I’m into, I still want to share them with him. But he’s seven, he’s on the spectrum, and he’s never sat still for a “grownup” movie before. I don’t know for sure if he’ll even want to see it.

On Dec. 19, after I picked him up from school, I brought him home and we sat together and watched the trailer on YouTube, then I looked at him and said, “Do you want to see that movie next summer?” He said, “Yes,” but he says “yes” to virtually everything. Sometimes I think he does it just because he thinks if he agrees we’ll leave him alone and he can go back to watching videos of failed field goal attempts, which is his most recent obsession.

But then, a few days after Christmas, my wife and I brought him to the movies to watch Sonic the Hedgehog 3. Until now, all of the movies he’s seen in the theater have been pure cartoons, and while there’s still an awful lot of animated content in Sonic, this is still the first time he watched anything in a theater with a significant amount of live-action. I considered this a test run. The lights dimmed and the trailers started. And after trailers for Dog Man and other such kiddie fare, the screen shifted to an empty arctic landscape that looked remarkably familiar. And I heard those strums of an electric guitar.

And then there was a little hand grabbing my arm. Eddie looked up at me, a huge smile on his face and excitement in his eyes, and he whispered, “Superman.”

The year is off to a pretty good start.  

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. He believes that this experiment will ultimately be far more successful than the previously-suggested “Year of the Toxic Avenger.”

Geek Punditry #104: The 2024 Pundy Awards

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It’s the final Friday of the year, and that means it’s time once again to sit back and talk about all of my favorite things from this year. It’s time for the 2024 Pundy Awards!

Yes, just like I did in 2023, I’m going to wrap up the second year of my little column by talking about some of my favorite pieces of pop culture to come down the pipe this year. There is no rhyme or reason to this, the categories will be decided purely based on what I feel like talking about as I write this. I’m going to tell you my favorites in movies, TV, and comics from the past twelve months, and I’m gonna tell you why I dig them and why you should check them out if you haven’t already. Also in order to avoid repeating myself, I’m going to skip over shows and comic book series that I “awarded” last year. Please be aware that I’m still a fan of Abbott Elementary, Batman/Superman: World’s Finest, Fantastic Four, Skybound’s Energon Universe, and ESPECIALLY the final season of Star Trek: Lower Decks, and they’re all worth your time.

But today, I want to talk about things I haven’t talked about before. At least…stuff that I haven’t talked about as much. Let’s get on with it!

Not the only movie this year that made me feel seen.

Blake’s Favorite Animated Movie: Inside Out 2. 

Back in June, I wrote a piece about how the shine had fallen off the once-immaculate reputation of Pixar Animation studio. After a series of duds, I wondered if the sequel to Pixar’s Inside Out was going to have what it took to bring back some of the studio’s former glory. I was so, so happy to see that it did. The first Inside Out was a great look at how the mind of a child develops and learns to process emotions, anthropomorphizing the process but doing so in a way that was both entertaining and easy to understand. Inside Out 2 continued this trend, with the character of Riley getting a bit older and the emotions she experiences becoming more complicated. Adding in the likes of Envy, Ennui, Embarrassment, and especially Anxiety into the mix has changed the game, making for a movie that perfectly encapsulates the personal journey a person goes through when they grow up. The finale of the movie was absolutely remarkable, with a scene that so perfectly demonstrates the experience of an anxiety attack that I nearly broke down in the movie theater. My son, Eddie, has since declared Inside Out 2 his favorite movie, and I’m not about to argue with him.

“Another movie about hanging around outside a convenience store, Kev?”
“Nah, this time it’s a movie theater.”

Blake’s Favorite Comedy: The 4:30 Movie.

I’ve been a fan of Kevin Smith for a very long time, and I’ve found it fascinating how his films have changed over the years. His early movies like Clerks and Mallrats were a reflection of the aimless feeling of being a young adult and trying to figure out what life is actually supposed to be. His more recent films, particularly Jay and Silent Bob Reboot and Clerks III, demonstrate a growing maturity and a sense of grappling with a life that didn’t turn out to be what you expected. Although he hasn’t let go of the filthy humor and goofy characters that made his name, he’s a subtler, more sophisticated storyteller than he used to be, and I appreciate that. The 4:30 Movie doesn’t connect to his “View Askewniverse” at all, instead telling the story of a young man in the 80s trying to find the guts to make a play for the girl he’s in love with, all set around a day going to the movies. Are there dirty jokes? Absolutely. But the film is wonderfully heartfelt, and even though neither Kevin Smith nor his alter-ego Silent Bob make an appearance on screen, you can tell that this movie was intensely personal. The final scene hammers that in especially, giving you a feeling that Kevin Smith has, in a way, told his own origin story. It’s a great movie.

Tagline: “You will believe a grown man can cry.”

Blake’s Favorite Documentary: Super/Man: The Christopher Reeve Story. 

This should not be a surprise to anybody, but the documentary about the actor who brought Superman to life for my generation was incredibly moving. Everybody knows the basics of Christopher Reeve’s story – how he played Superman, how a horseback riding accident left him paralyzed from the neck down, and how he became a crusader for the disabled in the years before his untimely death. This movie delves into his history in a deeper way, told mostly through the reflections of his now-adult children, as well as further commentary and anecdotes from other family and friends. The movie bounces back and forth between his life story prior to his accident and the way his life changed afterwards. Having his children tell the story, I think, is one of the things that really helps sell the tale. The film feels so much more intimate and personal, coming from the point of view of the people who knew and loved him the best. One thing I didn’t expect, though, was the heavy focus on Reeve’s friendship with the late Robin Williams. Again, this is something fans of the actor knew about, but the way they intertwined the tragedy of Williams’s own life with that of Christopher Reeve just made it all the more powerful. Have your tissues ready when you watch this one.

Okay, if I’m gonna be honest here, Super-Man is not the only thing in this list that made me cry.

Blake’s Favorite Family TV Series: Bluey

I know, this is another one of those “no duh” moments. I have written extensively about my love for Bluey before, in particular this spring’s season finale episode, “The Sign.” But there was simply no other TV show this year that had as deep and profound an impact on me. In the final episode of this season, we saw the Heelers preparing both for a family wedding and a move to another city, two life-changing events that the titular Bluey was having a tough time dealing with. Bandit, the dad that every father on the planet is striving to become, is trying to do the best thing for his family, even as it becomes increasingly clear to the viewer that the rest of the family doesn’t actually want to leave. It’s a beautiful story and still amazingly funny, and the final song (by cast member Meg Washington) is absolutely sublime. It comes across as a meditation on being a parent and having a child, and it’s the kind of thing that absolutely overwhelms your heart if you’ve got children of your own. I couldn’t be happier with the news that the long-talked about Bluey movie has been officially announced, and I only wish we weren’t going to have to wait until 2027 for it to hit theaters. 

Remember when science fiction was SMART? It’s finally back.

Blake’s Favorite Science Fiction Series (That Isn’t Star Trek: Lower Decks): The Three-Body Problem

This Netflix series, based on the globally popular trilogy by Cixin Liu, launched this year and grabbed me immediately. Like the novel, the first season of this show focuses on several groups of people around the world trying to uncover a mystery. The show follows scientists, police, and people from other walks of life as they slowly uncover evidence of an impending alien invasion. The novels are amazing – an incredible portrait of this sort of singular event and how it would completely reshape the entire world. So far, the first season of the show is doing the same thing, but in different ways than the book. The novels, by a Chinese author, have a cast that is mostly Chinese as well, while the TV series is more international. Characters are omitted, others are combined with one another, new characters are added – the TV show uses the framework of the novel, but takes the story in different directions to reflect the difference in cast and the different cultures of the characters. As a result, while fans of the book can still enjoy it, there’s still room to be surprised. I loved the novels, and I loved the show too, but for different reasons and in different ways. That’s one of the best things you can hope for in an adaptation.

This is the best an ongoing Spider-Man comic has been in 20 years, and it’s not even close.

Blake’s Favorite Ongoing Marvel Comic (That Isn’t Fantastic Four): Ultimate Spider-Man

Last year, Marvel announced a relaunch of its once-prominent “Ultimate” brand, which reimagined the Marvel heroes as new characters in the modern day. That version of the Ultimate Universe eventually gave birth to Miles Morales, but other than him, the rest of the line has been mostly jettisoned. The only other survivor is the Maker, an evil version of the Fantastic Four’s Reed Richards, who has created a NEW Ultimate Universe, and it’s the flagship book of THAT line that has captured my heart this year. In the new Ultimate Universe, the Maker deliberately prevented most of the world’s superheroes from having their respective origin incidents, until their Tony Stark uncovered the truth and decided to put things right. (This is a HIGHLY condensed version of the Ultimate Invasion miniseries, by the way, which is also worth reading.) In the new Ultimate Spider-Man, we open with an adult Peter Parker who is powerless, married to Mary Jane Watson, and the father of two children when he is approached with the news that he’s supposed to be one of the world’s greatest heroes, and there’s a way to make it happen. For years, Marvel Comics has turned the mainstream Peter Parker into a punching bag, submitting him to one mindless torture and humiliation after another, to the point where stretches of his comics are unbearably depressing. Ultimate Spider-Man is the antidote to that, proving that you can tell stories about a married couple, about parents, that are entertaining and emotionally engaging without sacrificing the superheroes. This Ultimate Universe is even further removed from the main Marvel U than the original Ultimate Universe was, but this comic has been fantastic so far.

“So EVERYBODY is in the Justice League now? Ghost-Maker? Robotman? Clownhunter?”
“Okay, let’s not get carried away.”

Blake’s Favorite Ongoing DC Comic: Justice League Unlimited.

This may be a tiny bit of a cheat, as there’s only been one issue of JSU so far, but it was preceded by the excellent Absolute Power miniseries, which set the story up and was by the same magnificent writer/artist team of Mark Waid and Dan Mora, so I’m counting that towards the series. After an absence of the Justice League from the DCU for a few years, it’s time for a most triumphant return in a way that has never been done in comics before. Rather than a team of seven to ten heroes protecting the whole dang world, Waid is embracing the “Unlimited” part of the title. The Justice League – as in the classic animated series of the same name – is now a massive force, with virtually every hero on the planet Earth recruited as a member. Everyone who has ever been in the League, every Titan, everyone who wears the S-shield, Bat-symbol, or bracelets of an Amazon, is now part of the League. Waid kicks things off with a first issue showing a longtime – but fairly obscure – hero called Air Wave being taken up to the Watchtower and joining in on his first mission as a member of the Justice League. The story was great, with an engaging and entertaining point of view that is set to save Air Wave from the ranks of the D-listers, and a twist that promises great things for the series. What’s more – I’m gonna sound like a broken record here – Dan Mora is probably the best superhero artist working in American comic books right now. His characters are bold, powerful, but still wonderfully human. This book hit every box for me in the first issue and I can’t wait to see where it goes next.

“What if we replace the spinach with boba?”
“No.”

Surprise of the Year: Eye Lie Popeye

It’s been a good year for reboots of old-school characters, including Dick Tracy, Flash Gordon, Thundercats, and the Universal Monsters. But the one that surprised me the most, in a delightful way, is Massive Publishing’s new series Eye Lie Popeye, by writer/artist Marcus Williams. When the series was announced, I didn’t think it would be my thing – a new version of Popeye is fine, but the artwork showed a distinct Manga flavor to it. I’ve got no issue with people who enjoy Manga, it’s just not usually the sort of thing I’m interested in, and I planned to pass on the series. Then came Free Comic Book Day, and they released a preview of the first issue. Guys, this is why Free Comic Book Day works, because it did exactly what it is intended to do: show me a glimpse of something that I hadn’t planned on reading, but that I found incredibly entertaining. Williams shows a deep knowledge of Popeye and his enormous cast of characters, and while the book DOES have that Manga influence, I was startled by just how well all of it managed to fit together. The style works for the characters, the storyline feels like the kind of thing that used to be done in the classic comic strips (which are quite different from the seven-minute slugfests that people who only know Popeye from his animated shorts might expect). Overall, I never would have thought it, but this was one of my favorite comic book finds of the year.

And that’s it for this year, friends – some, but not all, of my favorite movies, TV shows, and comics of 2024. Feel free to share your own favorites in the comments, and here’s to coming back here in a short 52 weeks to do it all over again!

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. And yeah, he barely mentioned it, but Lower Decks was amazing. Go read it. Go read it now. 

Geek Punditry #103: Blake’s Five Favorite Santa Claus Stories

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Once again, it’s time for Five Favorites, that semi-regular feature here in Geek Punditry where I give you my five favorite examples of something. “Favorite,” of course, is a relative term, and is actually pretty fluid for me. I may think of something tomorrow that would supplant one of the choices on this list if I were to write this again. But for here, for today, I want to talk about five of my all-time favorite Santa Claus stories.

With Christmas only days away, the big guy is up north checking out his list, loading up the sleigh, and slopping the reindeer, so it only seems fair to me that I talk about some of the stories that have made him such a beloved icon to the young and the young at heart for centuries now. Let’s talk about the tales that make St. Nicholas so great.

The Autobiography of Santa Claus as told to Jeff Guinn. 

This book, which is celebrating its 30th anniversary this year, has long been a favorite of mine. You see, when Santa decided it was time to tell the truth about his life story, he recruited journalist Jeff Guinn to help him compose the book, a deep dive into the life of the man who was once known as Nicholas, Bishop of Myra. 

If you’ve been reading my stuff for a while you’ve probably heard me talk about this book before, because it’s one I return to every few years. Guinn’s book mines actual history, including the true life of Nicholas, and combines it with a sort of subtle, beautiful magic. People expecting a superhero-style origin story for Santa Claus will be disappointed, because the truth is that Nicholas was just sort of “chosen” by unexplained forces, and to this day still doesn’t know why…but he knows that his mission is to give the world the gift of hope. 

The story is lovely, and I love the way he mixes real history with fantasy. In fact, the history doesn’t stop with Nicholas’s life, but goes on to show Santa’s interaction with things like the composition of the song “Silent Night,” his influence on Charles Dickens and Clement Clarke Moore, and the lives of some of the very unusual and unexpected helpers he’s accrued in his many centuries on this Earth. 

The book has two sequels. How Mrs. Claus Saves Christmas gives us a dive into Oliver Cromwell and his war on Christmas, and how Santa’s wife saved the holiday. The Great Santa Search rounds out the trilogy with a story set in the modern day, in which Santa finds himself competing on a TV reality show to prove who is, in fact, the true Santa Claus. All of the books are great, but the first one is my favorite.

Santa Claus: The Movie

If it’s a superhero origin that you’re looking for, though, this 1985 movie is for you. It was produced by Alexander and Ilya Salkind, riding the success of their Superman movies starring Christopher Reeve. And in fact, this movie is pretty much a straight rip of the structure of the first Superman movie: it begins with the character’s origin story (Santa and his wife are saved from freezing to death by the elves, who are there to recruit him), spends about half the film showing the hero’s development, and then introduces the villain at about the halfway point. From there we get to the real story, Santa fighting for relevance in a modern world where a corrupt toymaker is stealing his thunder.

I was eight years old when this movie came out, and that was apparently the perfect time to fall in love with it. I still love it. And David Huddleston – aka the Big Lebowski himself – is still my Santa Claus. When I close my eyes and picture St. Nicholas, it’s the David Huddleston version – his smile, his charm, his warm laugh are indelible parts of the Santa Claus archetype in my head. John Lithgow fills in Gene Hackman’s role as the villain, playing a cost-cutting toy executive named B.Z. who sees Christmas as nothing more than a profit margin. Dudley Moore is also along for the ride as Patch, one of the elves who finds himself in a bit of a crisis of faith. 

It’s a shame that this movie never got any sequels, because it was set up in such a way that there were many more stories to tell, but it underperformed and apparently did major damage to Dudley Moore’s career. Before this he was a rising comedy icon, and afterwards he fell off the A-list. I still think it’s a fantastic movie, though, and I have to admit that when I watch it, I wonder what would have happened if John Lithgow had ever had a turn playing Lex Luthor.

The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus by L. Frank Baum

For a different take on Santa’s origin, let’s wind the clock back to 1902. L. Frank Baum is riding the high of his hit children’s book The Wizard of Oz and he’s looking for a new project. Rather than return to Oz, though, he goes in a different direction and a different fairy tale – that of a young child abandoned in the woods and raised by fairies to become the most giving man in the world.

This is a very different take on Santa than most modern versions. It’s light on the fancy and heavy on the fantasy, with Santa being forced to do battle with monsters and creatures that are out to stop his quest to bring toys to children, and a conclusion that feels like it could have fallen out of the likes of Tolkien or C.S. Lewis. It’s hard to remember sometimes that the way we think about Santa Claus today was sort of codified by lots of little things over the early part of the 20th century – influences from poems, books, songs, and even the original AI-free Coca-Cola Santa Claus ads. But Baum’s book was before most of those things, and although his Santa doesn’t exactly jive with the Santa we know and love (no North Pole workshop, ten reindeer instead of eight, different fairy creatures instead of elves, and so forth), it’s still a fascinating read. It’s especially interesting if you’re a fan of the Oz books, as I am. This was two years before Baum would go back to his most famous creation and transform Oz from a single novel into a franchise, but it feels like it belongs in that “universe.” In fact, in later books Baum would link many of his unrelated books to the world of Oz through the connections of characters, other fairylands, and creatures that would grow in prominence. If you want to consider this the origin of Santa Claus in the universe of Oz, it’s not hard.

The Year Without a Santa Claus

Let’s get away from origin stories, though. We all love the Rankin/Bass classics, and their Christmas specials are legendary. In the top two specials, namely Rudolph and Frosty, Santa is just a supporting character. But they did give Santa a few specials of his own, and this second one is my favorite. In this 1974 Animagic classic, Mickey Rooney voices a Santa Claus that’s down with a nasty cold. This, coupled with a feeling of apathy from the children of the world about his annual visit, brings him to the conclusion that he’s going to skip a year. As the world faces the prospect of a Year Without a Santa Claus, it’s up to Mrs. Claus and a couple of helper elves to convince the big guy to pop a Zyrtec and get his act together.

This is the best of Rankin/Bass’s Santa-centric specials, although the most memorable thing about this cartoon isn’t Santa itself. We have this special to thank for the introduction of the Heatmiser and Coldmiser, battling brothers and sons of Mother Earth. They’re the best original Rankin/Bass characters by far, they have the best original song from any Rankin/Bass special by far, and even now you see them showing up in merch and decorations every year. It’s not easy for a new character to break into the pantheon of Christmas icons, but the Miser Brothers made the cut thanks to this awesome special and the fantastic musical arrangement of Maury Laws. The boys are a delight.

DC Comics Presents #67: Twas the Fright Before Christmas

Let’s wrap things up with this comic book from 1984. DC Comics Presents was a series in which Superman would team up with a different guest-star in each issue. Usually it was his fellow superheroes like the Flash, Batgirl, or the Metal Men. On occasion he’d have to partner up with a villain like the Joker. On more than one occasion he had to pair off with different versions of himself like Superboy, Clark Kent, or his counterpart from Earth-2. And on one memorable occasion he met up with He-Man and the Masters of the Universe, characters who were still on the rise.

But my favorite issue of the book is this one. Written by Len Wein with art by the most iconic Superman artist of the era, Curt Swan, in this issue Superman stumbles upon a little boy who tries to hold up a sidewalk Santa with a toy gun. Superman whisks the child off to his Fortress of Solitude at the North Pole where he determines that the child was hypnotized by a device in the toy, made by his old foe the Toyman. Leaving the Fortress, the boy’s toy zaps Superman with a burst of “white dwarf energy” which knocks him from the sky and leaves them stranded in the Arctic Circle. Luckily, they’re saved by some of the pole’s other residents. Superman and Santa then team up to save Christmas from the machinations of the sinister Toyman.

It’s a pretty silly story, but silly in a fun way. This is towards the end of the era in which Superman was allowed to be a little goofy, just two years before John Byrne would reimagine the character in his classic Man of Steel miniseries. And although that depiction of Superman has largely informed the character in the years since, it’s nice to see that modern writers aren’t afraid to bring back the kinds of things that made this story so memorable every once in a while. It ends with one of my LEAST favorite tropes, especially in a Christmas story (the whole “It was all just a dream…OR WAS IT?” nonsense), but that doesn’t diminish my love for it at all. I tend to go back and read this comic again every Christmas

Once again, guys, ask me tomorrow and there’s a good chance I would pick five totally different stories to populate this list, but as I write it here on December 20th, these are five of my favorite Santa Claus stories of all time. But I’m always open for new ones – what are yours?

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. Honorable mention goes to a story John Byrne did for Marvel’s What The?! comic where Santa twists his ankle delivering to Latveria and Dr. Doom has to take over and finish his route for him. 

Geek Punditry #102: Making a Merrython

blakemp Geek Punditry , , , , , , , , , ,

When the holidays roll around, one thing you can be certain of is that I’ll be queuing up all of the great Christmas movies and specials. And I don’t just mean the obvious ones like It’s a Wonderful Life, National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, the Rankin/Bass catalogue, or the legendary yuletide adventures of Garfield and Charlie Brown. I also have a great affection for Christmas episodes of old TV shows. As I’ve written before, there was a time when I would get home from school and watch reruns of old sitcoms for hours on end, allowing me to have a far greater memory of the contents of said television programs than I ever will less pertinent information, such as my wife’s telephone number. 

In this age of streaming, it seems like it would be simplicity itself to cultivate a massive playlist of holiday-themed episodes to start your own Christmas marathon…but alas, that does not seem to be the case. Although most streaming services have a “holiday” category, none of them seem to have what I really want, namely an option to just create my own playlist of episodes and set it to run on shuffle. I want an easily-curated selection of shows for a Yuletide Marathon – a Merrython, if you will. 

But if Netflix, Hulu, and Paramount Plus won’t let me do it, damn them, I’ll do it myself. Plex is a great system, an app that I can use to arrange and watch all of the movies and TV shows I’ve got saved on my own server, complete with my own cultivated playlists and a shuffle option. Now the catch here is that you actually have to provide the video yourself, which obviously limits things a little bit…but I started collecting DVDs almost a quarter of a century ago. I’ve got a LOT of TV shows on disc, and I’ve got lots of compilation DVDs of Christmas episodes from assorted TV series that I can throw into the mix as well.

While I certainly encourage everybody to create their own playlists, today I’m going to share with you a part of MINE. Here are just a few of my favorite Christmas-themed episodes of my favorite sitcoms, many of them episodes that are sitting in my Plex queue waiting to be watched. On Plex I set the playlist to shuffle, so I never know what’s coming up next…but for you guys, I’ll put them in chronological order.

The Honeymooners: “Twas the Night Before Christmas.” Season 1, episode 13, original air date Dec. 24, 1955.

My love for The Honeymooners knows no bounds. The only sitcom duo better than the pairing of Jackie Gleason and Art Carney is the pairing of Jackie Gleason and Audrey Meadows. Ralph Kramden’s antics with both his best friend and his wife are legendary, and have become part of the DNA of television comedy. While I can’t be certain that the Kramdens are the FIRST example of a sitcom schlub married to a woman who’s way out of his league, it’s definitely the trope codifier.

This legendary episode sees Ralph struggling to get a present for his wife, Alice, on the day before Christmas. Ralph is berating himself for having previously squandered money that he could have used to get her something nice on a bowling ball for himself (and before anybody says “Simpsons did it!” I must remind you that this show was some three decades before the adventures of Homer and Marge). As is always the case, Ralph ropes his sidekick Ed Norton into a variety of short-lived schemes to try to get the money or get a present for Alice, each of which is thwarted in a delightfully goofy fashion. In the end, the story works out to a sort of one-sided but utterly heartfelt variation of “The Gift of the Magi,” one that I never get tired of watching this time of year. Audrey Meadows was an absolute treasure, and this episode shows that as well as any.

I Love Lucy: “The I Love Lucy Christmas Show.” Season 6, episode 27, original air date Dec. 24, 1956

In this episode, the Ricardos and Mertzes are spending Christmas Eve together, struggling with decorating the tree and talking about how wonderful it was to have a child – Little Ricky – with whom to celebrate the holidays. I’ve mentioned before what an innovative show I Love Lucy was, on top of just being one of the funniest shows in television history, but this episode in particular has some historical significance. When Lucille Ball was pregnant in real life, they incorporated her pregnancy into the show. Those episodes proved to be overwhelmingly popular, and they wanted to milk a little of that juice again, so they used this episode to showcase the characters remembering the adventures they had surrounding Little Ricky’s birth. You see, not only did Lucy and Desi invent the rerun, but this Christmas episode marks the first clip show in television history.

These days, a lot of people consider clip shows tedious and wasteful, a cheap way to squeeze out an extra episode without spending a lot of money actually filming it, and in this day of shorter seasons the practice is almost extinct. But seventy years ago it was a chance for people to re-watch segments they loved, because there was no other option.

The show didn’t only recycle the clips, though, but also a gag at the end when all four adults (Lucy, Ricky, Fred, and Ethel) each independently decide to dress as Santa Claus to surprise Little Ricky. They wind up getting into a slapstick chase in the living room, during which a fifth Santa appears. As they remove each other’s beards trying to determine who is who, the superfluous St. Nick grins and vanishes before their eyes. They had first used this gag at the end of a season one episode, “Drafted,” in a tag that had nothing to do with the episode itself, and had shown it again in subsequent Christmases. This “remake” made a lot more sense, given the episode it was used to conclude. 

Cheers: “The Spy Who Came in For a Cold One.” Season 1, Episode 12, original air date Dec. 16, 1982.

Cheers did a few Christmas episodes over its 11-year run, but none of them cling to my mind better than this one from the first season. This was, of course, a period where the show was still kind of trying to find its identity. It was still predominantly a romantic comedy, focusing on Sam and Diane’s relationship, but even at this point the ensemble piece it would eventually become was starting to shine through.

In this episode, a stranger shows up for a drink at the bar around Christmas and “accidentally” lets it slip to the patrons that he is – drumroll please – a spy. Diane, ever the pragmatist, meets his claim with the expected skepticism, but most of the rest of the gang plays along with it, plying the stranger for stories of his exciting lifestyle. When Diane finds a way to trap the spy in his own web, everything blows up in her face.

Aside from the date and the decorations, this isn’t an especially Christmasy story. We don’t get the usual “very valuable lesson” that so many of these episodes come with, nor is there a heartwarming moment at the end where everybody gets together for a group hug and reminds one another that friends are the real family. But I like the way it hammers down the dynamics of the group, how Diane gets a somewhat needed comeuppance about being too smart for her own good, and how it deftly establishes some of the tone and tropes that would follow the series further down the line, even after Shelley Long left the show. 

The Golden Girls: “Twas the Nightmare Before Christmas.” Season 2, episode 11, original air date Dec. 20, 1986.

It’s Christmas in Miami, and the girls are all making plans to jet off to visit their respective families in other parts of the country. Things get derailed, however, when a man dressed as Santa Claus shows up at Rose’s grief counseling center and starts taking hostages.

Hopefully, by this point, nobody needs me to tell them what a brilliant show Golden Girls was. You had a cast of four outrageously talented comedic actresses and a team of writers who were willing to push the envelope in ways that few other shows in the 1980s took a chance doing, and it has legitimately become recognized as one of the greatest TV comedies ever made. The amazing thing about this particular episode is the way it breaks down the story into three segments, any of which would have been an entire episode of a lesser sitcom. It starts with a funny scene showing the gift exchange between the girls before they leave for the holidays, which itself is ripe with comedic potential. Then we crash into the hostage situation, which seems like it would be the whole episode on its own until Sophia casually takes the gun away from the hostage-taker and berates Dorothy for not being able to tell the difference between a real gun and a fake. The final act shows the girls – now stranded in Miami and unable to make their flights – having a Christmas Eve dinner in a diner where they slowly come to the realization that they haven’t missed out on a Christmas with family after all.

This episode wraps up with some of the schmaltz that the Cheers episode was missing, and it’s just lovely. It was only the second season of the show, and while the bond between the characters was evident, this was the episode that kind of cemented how deeply the four of them all cared about one another, which (despite any friction on the set in real-life) was truly the core of the show. And of course, typical of the Golden Girls, the drippy, gooey sentiment at the end is nicely undercut by a joke from Sophia, who is one of the greatest characters in television history.  

ALF: “ALF’s Special Christmas.” Season 2, episodes 12 & 13 (two-part episode), original air date Dec. 14, 1987

Ah, is there anything that says “TV in the 80s” better than the adventures of a Muppet-esque alien living with a typical American family to the delight of audiences everywhere and – apparently – to the eternal disdain of the cast that had to work with him? From all accounts, the set of ALF was not a pleasant place to be, but this show was a favorite of mine as a kid, and I’m still on a quest to complete my run of the Marvel ALF comic books (50 regular issues, three annuals, two Christmas specials, a “spring” special, and two digests). It’s an oddly formative part of my personality.

In this two-part episode, the family leaves the Tanner home for a trip into the woods for Christmas. Willie rents a cabin for the family to stay in where ALF will be free from prying eyes, but as tends to happen, the little furball gets lost, winding up in a hospital where he’s mistaken for a doll and given to a child with a serious illness. He befriends the girl and eventually leaves, but the memory of her clings to him. Meanwhile, the Tanners find out that the man they’re renting the cabin from is giving it to them – two weeks after the death of his wife, he seems to be divesting himself of a lot of things…

This is honestly a pretty dark episode, even for a show like ALF, which frequently mixed a little darkness into its humor. (Cat buffet, anybody?) The two plotlines are about a child with a terminal illness and an old man contemplating suicide – fun for the whole family, right? But the whole thing is done with the typical ALF touch. There’s some goofy humor in it, and a dose of heart that makes the darkness a bit more bearable…and honestly, I think that’s kind of the point. The show doesn’t turn a blind eye to the bad things in the world, but does its best to show how to cope with them. That’s something I’ve always appreciated about it.

Frasier: “Frasier Grinch.” Season 3, episode 9, original air date Dec. 19, 1995

Let’s wing our way back to the Cheers Universe for this third-season episode of its successful spinoff show. The original Frasier was a brilliant series and arguably the most successful comedy spinoff of all time, but there was one thing about the adventures of Frasier Crane in Seattle that always kinda bugged me: the distance from his son. When the producers decided to give Kesley Grammar a spinoff they shipped him off to the other side of the country to do their best to resist the urge to have cameos from his former co-stars every other week, but the side effect here was that Frasier often came off as a very absentee father…ironic, as one of the best parts of this show was watching as Frasier rekindled his relationship with his own father, Martin. In this episode, Fraiser’s son Freddy is coming to Seattle to spend the holidays with his dad, and Frasier decides to shower the boy with the very thing every kid wants for Christmas: educational toys! It’s not long before Frasier realizes the enormity of his error and has to venture out to find the gifts Freddy REALLY wants for Christmas.

Like Diane in the parent show, the intelligentsia in the Crane family occasionally needed a reminder that they were not always the smartest ones in the room. This episode does a lot to help Frasier seem like a well-meaning father willing to go to great lengths to give his child a Merry Christmas (the least he could do, as he only sees the kid in one or two episodes a season). It also has some really great stuff with Martin, nailing the dynamic between Kelsey Grammar and John Mahoney. Frasier did many more Christmas episodes than Cheers, but this is my favorite.

Community: “Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas.” Season 2, episode 11, original air date Dec. 9, 2010.

By the second season of Community, the show had firmly embraced its role of commenting on and parodying the various tropes of sitcoms, and in this episode they went one step further by parodying classic Christmas specials. The entire episode is done in stop motion animation, mimicking the old Rankin/Bass “Animagic” style, as Abed is somehow stuck seeing the world as a holiday special. With the help of Professor Duncan, Abed’s study group tries to get to the bottom of his delusion and help him see the world the way that it really is.

This is not the first sitcom to try an animated special for the holidays – Home Improvement had a memorable episode that had a segment in stop motion animation, for example. But what elevates Community is that the episode does not ONLY parody Christmas specials, but also makes a real commentary on the characters. Despite his delusions, we learn things in this episode about Abed and his family that leave deep fingerprints on the character and make him a little more understandable than he may have been in the past. The episode has one of the most bizarre explanations for “the meaning of Christmas” that I’ve ever heard, but damned if it isn’t just perfect for this show. 

Abbott Elementary: “Holiday Hookah.” Season 2, episode 10, original air date Dec. 7, 2022.

The newest entry on my Christmas playlist comes from what I maintain is the best live-action comedy currently on television, ABC’s Abbott Elementary. After the last day of school before the winter break, young teachers Janine and Gregory (who have had your classic “will they/won’t they” thing happening for some time now) happen to run into each other at a hookah bar, each with a group of friends. Even if you’ve never seen an episode of this particular series, if you’ve watched other shows that use the same trope (see about a billion other shows) you’ll see the trajectory that this plotline is taking. There’s awkwardness, obvious attraction, confusion, and a reluctance to hook up with somebody you work with. It’s all done well, but is kind of standard stuff.

What I really like about this episode is actually the B-plot. Two of the older veteran teachers, Barbara and Melissa, have a tradition of having a Christmas dinner together after the end of the fall term each year. This year Jacob – a young teacher who fancies himself to be far cooler than he actually is – finds out about their celebration and winds up crashing their “Christmas Lounge.” The interaction between these three is wildly funny, and the relationship between Barbara (Sheryl Lee Ralph) and Melissa (Lisa Ann Walter) has become a core pillar of the show at this point. Although the two are almost diametrically opposites of one another, personality-wise, their shared experience and long relationship has them stand out as the best of friends. It’s one of the sweeter, most realistic elements of the show (I can name several pairs of teachers I know in real life that remind me very much of these two), and I think this episode showcases that extremely well.

We also get your usual “somebody has to learn a lesson” moments that frequently accompany any Christmas episode, and as befits this series, they come from unlikely sources. Ava – the crazy principal who often seems wholly unsuited for her job – comes to Janine’s rescue, while Jacob gets his head screwed on straight thanks to the timely intervention of conspiracy nut custodian Mr. Johnson. All of it together makes for a fine Christmas viewing. 

There you have it, friends, some sitcom classics to get you in the Christmas mood this year. This is, of course, not to be considered a comprehensive list. There are hundreds of shows that have done Christmas episodes, and creating a truly complete list is probably beyond my abilities as a humble Geek Pundit. Which is why I invite you to share some of your favorites here in the comments, or on whatever social media you followed to get here! What are some of the all-time great Christmas episodes that have made it to YOUR Merrython playlist?

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He didn’t even get to Laverne and Shirley, The Simpsons, Bob’s Burgers, The Beverly Hillbillies, Friends, Family Ties, Night Court, Family Matters, Perfect Strangers, Mama’s Family, Seinfeld, The Office, or The Big Bang Theory. Maybe there needs to be a sequel to this column next year. 

Geek Punditry #101: This is How We Do It-The Muppet Christmas Carol

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We’ve made it again, folks. Eleven months down and it is once again permissible to crack open our DVDs (or streaming services) and start watching Christmas movies, which is pretty much the reason for existence. And today I’m going to talk to you about one of the greatest ever made: The Muppet Christmas Carol. In “This is How We Do It,” I take a piece of storytelling and discuss just what, exactly, makes it so damned good. And while I doubt there are many people who need convincing that The Muppet Christmas Carol is a classic, it is well worth taking the time to break it down a little. I love A Christmas Carol. I love the book, I love the many derivative movies and TV shows based on the book. I have, at last count, watched over 40 different film adaptations of Charles Dickens’ novel, and for years I said that the Muppet version is “maybe” the best of them. This year, I am removing the modifier. The Muppet Christmas Carol is THE best adaptation of Charles Dickens’ classic, and lemme tell you why.

Who knew Emily Cratchit could be so hot?

A Christmas Carol is perhaps the single most-adapted story in the history of motion pictures and even when the Muppet version was made back in 1992, it had already been done to DEATH. We had seen “traditional” versions with the likes of Albert Finney and Alastair Sim. We saw modern reimaginings with Bill Murray and Henry Winkler. We had versions starring Scrooge McDuck, Bugs Bunny, Mr. Magoo, George Jetson, and Fred Flintstone. We had gender-swapped versions, we had versions transplanted to other holidays, we had comedies and dramas and musicals. The Teen Titans used it to break up a scheme that involved getting around import tariffs and Rod Serling had taken the framework to do a kind of tedious fable about nuclear war.

IT. HAD. BEEN. DONE.

Logically, once you’ve seen the Fonz as Scrooge, where else is there to take it?

There are only two reasons left to do a version of the story: either to put a unique twist on it or to showcase a masterful performer. Well there’s no unique twist here, but the Muppets themselves are one of the greatest acting troupes of all time. Nobody needed to see A Christmas Carol again. We wanted to see Kermit, Piggy, Fozzie, and Gonzo in THEIR version of A Christmas Carol. And the casting was flawless – Kermit (voiced by Steve Whitmire) as Bob Cratchit, Piggy (Frank Oz) as Mrs. Cratchit, Fozzie (Oz again) as “Fozziwig,” and so forth. 

But the REAL casting coup of this movie was taking Gonzo the Great (Dave Goelz) and casting him as Charles Dickens himself. So much of what makes Dickens’ story work is the beautiful narration, and narration is often lost when translating a book to film. The solution was to cast Gonzo as Charles Dickens himself, supplying the narration and keeping such phenomenal lines as “Marley was dead to begin with” intact. Well… “The Marleys,” but close enough. Anyway, pairing him with Rizzo the Rat (Whitmire) turned the narrator into half of a comedy team that worked perfectly, and the dynamic that was created between these two characters remains to this day.

The TRUE heroes of Christmas.

Even though Gonzo reciting Dickens’ words gives the film a little weight and gravitas, the two of them together are there to add in a little Muppety silliness when it calls for it (such as when Gonzo has to remind Sam the Eagle that he’s playing a Brit and not an American). But they’re smart enough not to overuse them, especially when they nope out as Christmas Future is showing up. They sell the joke as Gonzo and Rizzo being scared of the spirit, but the obvious truth is that this upcoming sequence is going to be Scrooge’s darkest hour, and throwing in a tension-breaker at this point is the exact OPPOSITE of what you should be doing. 

The Muppeteers chose not to use traditional Muppets as the ghosts of Past, Present, or Future, though, instead creating new characters to inhabit those roles. I think that was probably the best choice. Each of them has a unique, ethereal quality, that of a being that belongs to another world, that would have been sacrificed if Present had been played by Sweetums, Future by Uncle Deadly, or anything like that. They absolutely made the right choice.

Here’s a fun game to play with your kids. I call it “which one gives you the most nightmares?”

Then there’s the human cast. While all of them are good, Michael Caine as Ebenezer Scrooge is phenomenal. The story, as most of us have heard, is that Caine chose to play the role perfectly straight, as if he were performing Scrooge amongst a cast of human actors rather than puppets, and in so doing he gave a performance that I frankly think was robbed of Oscar consideration. (Scent of a Woman my ass, Pacino.) It’s so easy to play Scrooge as the cold-hearted miser that we think of him as. Any halfway-decent actor can do it. What not every actor can do, what sets Caine apart, is the way he sells Scrooge’s transformation. Even in the early scene, where he begrudgingly agrees to let Cratchit and the bookkeepers have Christmas Day off, there’s a hint in his voice that it’s not entirely cold-hearted. There’s a spark of warmth – a very DIM spark, but it’s there. He tries to disguise it, but you can feel that there is understanding in his voice.

His glare, on the other hand, is scary as hell.

As the film progresses, each successive visit with the ghosts shows this change in a more pronounced way, as Scrooge’s defenses begin to fall and he is struck with the stark horror that his life has become. Caine shows regret, sorrow, pain, and genuine, sincere remorse for the terrible things he’s done in his life. This is the key, you see, this is what poor adaptations of the story get wrong. Scrooge’s redemption cannot come simply from the fear of his future. As people on the internet love to point out, if the only reason you behave morally is for fear of punishment, you’re not really a moral person to begin with. A truly good person does good for the sake of doing good. (We shall return to this subject next summer, just before James Gunn’s new Superman movie comes out.) The best adaptations of A Christmas Carol – and again, this is THE best – have to begin selling the redemption before fear for the future can set in.

The redemption truly starts with the most contentious scene in the film. If you go to Disney+, there are actually TWO versions of the movie. The one that plays if you just click on it is the expurgated version, which removes the song “The Love is Gone” from the Christmas Past sequence. If you want to watch the uncut movie, you have to go to “extras” and select “full version.” Disney chose to cut the song from the original release of the movie, saying that it slowed down the pace too much and that it was too sad.

My dude. My friend. My mouse. THAT. IS. THE. POINT.

If I’m watching Disney+ and sobbing openly, I’m probably either watching this or Bluey.

“The Love is Gone” is sung by Meredith Braun, playing Scrooge’s lost love, Belle. After Scrooge watches the scene where she ends the relationship with his younger self, she launches into this heartbreaking piece about everything they have lost. At the end of the song, Caine joins in, singing a duet with a woman who cannot see or hear him. As the song continues he slowly, inexorably, crumbles into sobs. The agony in his face and his voice is a master class in acting. For the first time, Scrooge is truly forced to face the way his horrific choices have destroyed not only his own chances at happiness, but those of the person he loved the most in the world. It slows the pace? GOOD. Scrooge has to stop and realize what he’s done, and as we are going on the journey with him, we have to stop too.

It doesn’t hurt of course that Paul Williams, who wrote the songs for the film, absolutely pours his heart out into this one. It’s beautiful and tragic and haunting. And by the end of it, you see that Scrooge has already realized his mistake. This is not extraneous. This is crucial to his journey of redemption.

The transformation continues in the Christmas Present sequence. It’s one thing to recognize that you’ve made a mistake, but just acknowledging it isn’t enough to guarantee that your ways will change. This is accomplished when Present takes Scrooge to visit his nephew’s Christmas party. Seeing good-hearted Fred (Steve Mackintosh) and his guests make him the butt of a joke – calling him an “unwanted creature” in a 20 Questions-style guessing game – breaks Scrooge’s heart just a little bit more, as he realizes how people view him. At the same time, this is the nephew who practically begged him to join them in the first scene. Even today, Scrooge’s choices are causing his separation from those who would love him. 

If that wasn’t enough, the visit to the Cratchit house nails it when Scrooge is told about the serious condition of Bob’s son, Tiny Tim (played, naturally, by Kermit’s nephew Robin). This is – to be fair – one of the easiest parts of the story to get right. If you can’t sell somebody feeling sorry for the plight of a small, sickly child, you have no business calling yourself a storyteller. But as always, the Muppets kick it up a notch. Kermit and Robin enter the scene to a lovely, joyful scat, singing about how jolly Christmas is. Tiny Tim isn’t immediately shown as an object of pity, as he is so often, but rather as a happy, gleeful child who deserves a chance at life. They launch into the centerpiece song “Bless Us All,” which is something of a love letter to the importance of family and togetherness, those very things that Scrooge has driven out of his life. It’s a warm, tender, heartfelt song that is undercut when the song ends with Tim’s tiny, tragic, prophetic cough to remind us that if something doesn’t change he is not long for this world. 

It helps if you don’t know anything about how genetics works.

Why are these things important? It’s simple. Christmas Past made Scrooge understand how badly he had screwed up. Present shows him that – although he cannot change the past – there is still time to make better choices for the FUTURE. That message is so blasted important. Anyone who has wrestled with depression can tell you how crippling the past can be, how it can cling to a person and make them hate themselves. It’s so easy to wallow in that and assume that nothing can be done about your life.

The message of Christmas Past was, “You made mistakes.” The message of Christmas Present is, “BUT THERE’S STILL TIME. YOU DON’T HAVE TO MAKE MORE.”

Not every version of A Christmas Carol sells this important message. NONE of them sell it as well as the Muppets.

In many ways, by the time Christmas Future shows up, Scrooge has already been redeemed. He’s taken the message of the first two ghosts to heart, and when Future arrives he tells him that he is ready and willing for the lessons the ghost has come to impart upon him. This line comes straight from Dickens, by the way, and any adaptation that leaves it out is completely missing the point. Past and Present do the heavy lifting, vis a vis Scrooge’s transformation. Future is really just there to deliver – pardon the expression – the nail in the coffin. 

Another thing this version does that sets it apart comes in this sequence. Some versions of the story have Scrooge totally oblivious in the Christmas Future scene, as people are joking about the death of some mysterious “wealthy man” and we see his servants pawning his belongings for a little extra cash. It is obvious from the first second that the dead man is Scrooge itself, but a lot of versions of A Christmas Carol don’t let SCROOGE know that until he sees his own name on the tombstone. But the thing is, Scrooge isn’t an idiot. Although he never says it, the way Caine plays the part makes it clear that he’s pieced it together pretty quickly, that he is seeing the fallout of his own demise. He never says it, perhaps because they’re trying to stay relatively true to Dickens, but just as likely because he doesn’t want to admit to to himself. If you watch the scene in the graveyard, his behavior is clearly that of a man who knows he’s staring at his fate long before the appearance of his name makes that clear. Just one more reason that Caine is the best Scrooge ever, even better than the classically-trained Quincy Magoo.

“I’m here to speak to you about your soul’s extended warranty.”

The finale, when Caine leads the Muppets in the song “Thankful Heart,” is absolutely beautiful. His every mannerism has been changed, and the expression on his face when he looks at those around him is not of a man afraid of the future, but of someone consumed by the love he has so long denied himself. My favorite part, though, comes when he sings the lines:

Stop and look around you, the glory that you see
Is born again each day, don’t let it slip away
How precious life can be!

There’s a moment in those lines where Caine’s voice breaks, just a little – a cracking in his song that sounds like he’s holding back tears. But again, his face sells it – those tears beneath the surface are not of pain, but joy and gratitude for the second chance he’s been given.

Until The Human Centipede, this was the most joyful moment in cinematic history.

I don’t say this often. I reserve it for the likes of Jaws, Back to the Future, and The Princess Bride. But I genuinely think The Muppet Christmas Carol is a perfect movie.

There’s a bit of meta-triumph here as well. The film was directed by Jim Henson’s son Brian, and was the first major Muppet production after Jim Henson’s tragic death. There was a real question in the air as to whether the Muppets would work without the man who brought them to life. This movie proved that the spirit of the Muppets is greater even than their founder, that it IS something that can live on and survive and endure. 

Disney would do well to remember that.

So the next time somebody decides to grab a camera and start rolling on a new version of A Christmas Carol…well, I would never tell them not to do so. As this film proves, there’s always room for a good version.

But before you do it, watch this movie. Watch it over and over again. And learn the lessons of the Muppets.

Because THIS is how we do it. 

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. Second-best version of A Christmas Carol? Bill Murray in Scrooged. Maybe I’ll explain that next year.

Geek Punditry #100: If I Were King of Comics

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Here we are, my friends, 100 Fridays later. In the first week of January 2023, I was thinking of how much I missed the days of writing for Comixtreme and recording my podcast, and I wanted to find a regular way to get my voice back out there in the world. How could I do it? I asked myself. How can I reach out and gift humanity with my invaluable thoughts, insights,and trademark witticisms, in this era where the world clearly needs me more than ever before?

Then I remembered I had a blog that I was barely using, and maybe it would be a nice little challenge for me to find something – once a week, just find SOMETHING – that I liked enough to write a few paragraphs about. 

And of course, it has become the global phenomenon and world-altering sensation you see before you today. 

As I approached the 100th installment of the column hundreds of voracious readers have called “on the internet somewhere,” I tried really hard to decide what to write about. What, in the enormous global marketplace of popular culture that I had made my home, was worthy of dedicating the landmark 100th column to? Star Trek? Stephen King? Superman? Bluey? I feel like I’ve kind of talked about those various topics…well, “extensively” seems in some ways to be too mild a term, but we’ll roll with that right now. No, I needed something a little bit different.

Then I remembered an idea I’d had some time ago, but that I had pushed aside. Something I thought needed to percolate a little more. Something that the world would HAVE to sit up and take notice of. And it seemed perfect. So this week, ladies and gentlemen, allow me to explain to you what exactly I would do if I were in charge of comic books.

You all know I’m a comic book geek, and I have been since I was a small child. Not to discount my love of movies, TV, or novels…I’m a fan of storytelling in general. But comics are in many ways my medium of choice. I’m a regular Wednesday visitor at my local comic shop, I know all the members of the Legion of Super-Heroes, and I can tell you – in order – every publisher that has ever had the Star Trek license. (Gold Key, Marvel, DC, Malibu but only Deep Space Nine, back to Marvel, Wildstorm – which was by then a DC imprint – and currently IDW. Sorry, ladies. I’m taken.)

As much as I love comic books, though, there are certain practices in the industry that I’m not a fan of, certain things that I think could be done better. In this era, where there’s so much competition for the attention of an audience coming from virtually every region of our culture, it’s imperative that comic book publishers find ways to draw in new readers and retain existing ones. Ways to make the sometimes complex mythologies of American comic books a little less of a roadblock, and make the space a little more welcoming. For the 100th Geek Punditry, guys, here are some rules that would be implemented if I were King of Comics.

Numbering

As most people know, comic book series are numbered, and for many decades the numbering convention was simple. You started with issue #1, proceeded to #2, and so forth. You just put the numbers in order. Seemed like a simple idea. But at some point things started to get a little more convoluted. After World War II, many of the existing superhero comics had been cancelled. But in the 50s, looking for a new hit after public favor turned against things like horror comics, DC decided to bring back some of their defunct characters with a new incarnation. A new Flash was created – Barry Allen – and after a few tryout issues in the pages of Showcase, they gave him his own title. Barry took over the numbering of the Golden Age Flash, Jay Garrick, and his first issue was #104. Here’s where it gets confusing: they then did they same thing with Green Lantern. But in this case the new guy – Hal Jordan – did NOT pick up from Alan Scott’s title with issue #39, but instead got his own first issue, Green Lantern Vol. 2 #1.

Make it make sense.

It would not be the last time this happened. In the 80s they gave new first issues to Superman, Wonder Woman, and The Flash, and in those cases, the lapse in publishing between the previous volume and the new was not nearly as long as it had been in the silver age. Then in the 90s, Marvel did it with four of their flagship titles at once – Avengers, Fantastic Four, Iron Man, and Captain America – as part of a new initiative where the titles were essentially farmed out to Jim Lee and Rob Liefeld and set in a different world than the “regular” Marvel Universe. When the books were brought back to the “regular” Universe a year later, they were given a THIRD first issue…and then all hell broke loose.

Since then, virtually every comic book published by Marvel or DC Comics has been canceled and relaunched with a new first issue, most of them multiple times. Batman, at last count, is on its conservative third volume. Superman is at six. Punisher – if I’m counting correctly – has recently concluded volume FOURTEEN. The longest running comic book at either publisher that has not been restarted at least ONCE? Looney Tunes, which recently celebrated issue #281. (It should be noted, though, that even this is the fourth volume of Looney Tunes, having been published by various other companies before Warner Bros. wholly absorbed DC Comics.)

Winner of the gold medal in “not starting over for no reason.”

The conventional wisdom seems to be that a new first issue will bring in higher sales numbers than issue #482, and that might be true. But increasingly, it has proven that a tenth issue #7 does NOT have appreciably more readers than issue #489 would have. In other words, the restarting game gives a short-term sales bump, but does nothing to retain readers, which is what the goal should be.

Anyway, to appease fans (such as myself) who prefer maintaining the original numbering rather than the constant restarts, Marvel and DC have begun featuring “legacy numbers” on the covers of their books – in other words, what issue would this be had the book never been restarted? Which is why the recent Superman Vol. 6 #20 also bears a little symbol indicating that the “Legacy Number” of this issue is #863.

Only long-time Superman fans will understand what I mean when I say “at least it’s in a triangle.”

Confused yet?

Making it even more confusing is the way that many series have changed titles over the years, and trying to figure out which is which. Thor started as Journey Into Mystery, one of Marvel’s assorted sci-fi titles. But after he made his debut, Thor quickly took over the comic book, and the title was changed from Journey into Mystery to The Mighty Thor with issue #126 When calculating the Thor legacy numbers, the original JIM numbers seem to count, but JIM itself has been re-started several times over the years. Journey Into Mystery Vol. 2 does NOT count, apparently, as it ran concurrently with Mighty Thor. And let’s not forget that the current series carrying the Legacy Number is actually called Immortal Thor, which has the same legacy numbers as did previous volumes like Mighty Thor, King Thor, Thor: God of Thunder, or the (at last count) six different series that have just been called Thor. 

According to the legacy numbers, these are all issues of the same title.

Then there’s the fact that it’s inconsistently applied, especially at DC. Superman (on Volume 6), Batman (Volume 3), Flash (Volume 6), and Green Arrow (Volume 7) all have Legacy Numbers on their covers. Nightwing (Volume 4), Harley Quinn (Volume 4), and Titans (Volume 4) do not, and I can see no particular reason why. 

It’s an absolute mess. True story: when the Captain Marvel movie came out in 2018 my wife – who is a geek but not as big a geek as I am – was interested in reading some of the comics to learn more about the character, but after several attempts to figure out which volume to start with, she gave up. If the plan here is to get MORE readers, it’s failing miserably.

So how do we fix this problem? 

Here’s what I would make the standard rule: first of all, the Legacy Numbers should be mandatory for any series that continues the title or star of a previous series. The editors would need to get together right away, decide which books count towards the “legacy” and then stick with it from then on. 

Second, I would have them stop with the constant relaunches. If a character is returning after ten years away…okay, a new first issue might be justified. If we’re going back to issue #1 because there’s a new inker, it’s not. It’s become a common practice to start over with a new first issue any time there’s a change of creative team, especially when there’s a new writer. It’s too much. So here’s the rule: there must be a minimum of three years since the previous volume before a new first issue is justified. If the final issue of Captain Dudeman was #47 and it came out eighteen months ago, then you either have to start with Captain Dudeman #48 or you have to change the title. 

That second stipulation, I think, would start to get used very frequently. One of the reasons that the renumbering has gotten so rampant is that every time a new writer is brought onto a series they want to make their own mark – which is fair. But in so doing, they often want a clean slate, a sort of “back-to-basics” approach for the character, which has resulted in several books in the last few years where the first issue shows the heroes in a wholly different situation than they were in when the previous volume ended, and then it’s not until several issues later that the reasons for the change are actually explained. Sometimes it works (Fantastic Four and Daredevil both did this effectively in their most recent relaunches) and sometimes it doesn’t (the current run of Amazing Spider-Man should be studied by scholars as a cautionary example of what NEVER to do).

I don’t want to take away a writer’s ability to tell the stories they way they see fit, that’s not what this is about. But if the plan is to tell a totally different story, changing the title of the series is a good way to reduce confusion. Telling somebody “You have to read Green Lantern – but not that one, or that one, or that one…” is a recipe for the kind of bafflement that drove my wife away. But saying “Green Lantern: Emerald Champions is a great series” is a HELL of a lot easier for the casual reader to comprehend. You can keep the legacy numbers that way, but having a subtitle or supertitle (that’s when you preface the main title with something else, such as Peter Parker, the Spectacular Spider-Man) makes it a lot easier to differentiate one run from another. 

What this really boils down to is that I never again want to see a comic book called Fantastic Four #1. When I was a kid, owning that book would have been a gold mine. Now I’ve got six different books called that, and it’s ridiculous. 

Cover Confusion

The way the comics industry handles its covers is also an issue, and there are two primary problems I want to tackle. First, let’s talk about pin-up covers. This isn’t as bad as it once was, but for a while there in the 00s and 10s, there was an awful trend of comic books having generic pictures of the main character or characters on the cover, something that may be a fabulous piece of art but doesn’t tell the reader anything about the story between the pages. The argument at the time, I believe, was that they wanted every issue to be an accessible first issue for a new reader. While that may be a noble goal, that doesn’t make a damned bit of sense. Anybody who picks up a comic because they like the picture of Spider-Man on the cover is going to have a hard time keeping up if they open up the comic and run into “Revenge of the Return of the Colonoscopy of the Sinister Six: Part Five of Seventeen.” Congratulations – you sold that one issue…but they aren’t coming back. 

“Wow, great cover!”
“Thanks!”
“What’s the story about?”
“What the hell is a story?”

Pin-up art is fine, but a great comic book cover should tell a story. Think about some of the all-time most memorable covers: Amazing Spider-Man #129 features the webspinner dangling in front of the faces of his friends, agonizing over which of them was going to die in that issue. Green Lantern (Vol. 3) #49 shows a power-mad Hal Jordan brandishing a set of rings stolen from his fallen comrades, a look of pure chaos in his eyes. Wolverine: Blood Hunt #2 shows the ol’ Canucklehead on a motorcycle with a French vampire babe being chased by a mob of vampire stormtroopers while fleeing an explosion that is also being escaped by an overhead passenger jet.

If just that description isn’t enough to make you pick up the book and look inside, I don’t think you actually like comic books.

Now THAT’S art.

These days it’s better, although many variant covers still have what I call the Pinup Problem. So here’s going to be the rule for this one: cover art MUST be relevant to the story inside. That doesn’t mean it has to be a depiction of an actual SCENE from the story. Thematic covers, like the above Amazing Spider-Man #129, are fine. Covers promising a twist or a mystery, anything like that is just dandy, provided it has SOMETHING to do with the story. The only exceptions, the only time a simple pin-up is acceptable, are when it’s the first issue of a series (and presumably a good jumping-on point anyway), if it’s the introduction of a new character, or for certain milestone issues, such as an issue number that ends in a double zero.  

Now that we’ve cleaned THAT little problem up, let’s talk about the REAL issue: variant covers. 

There’s debate over when, exactly, variant covers became a thing, although most people seem to agree that the first mainstream example of printing copies of the same book with two different covers was probably Man of Steel #1 in 1986, the John Byrne relaunch of the entire Superman mythos. That was an instance where it was novel and interesting and fun. People made an effort to buy both covers to make their collection “complete.” It was really cool.

You could get with this, or — alternatively — hear me out on this one…you could get with THAT.

But like so many good things, it got overdone. It didn’t happen overnight, mind you. It was quite some time before having two covers became a regular practice, and even longer before it reached the heights it has today. Even as late as ten years ago, having multiple covers was still more of an exception than a rule. But the rules have changed and HOW. 

If you pick up any random issue of a new comic from a mainstream publisher today, odds are that you will have between two and five covers to choose from. First issues are frequently more. For the first issue of this summer’s Uncanny X-Men relaunch, League of Comic Geeks (the website I use to track my own collection) lists 32 separate cover variants. And even THAT is chump change compared to the most recent relaunch of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from IDW Publishing, which currently stands at – 

Are you sitting down? Are you sitting down in the sewer?

ONE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY-SEVEN DIFFERENT COVERS.

If you are the sort of person who feels the need to get every available cover and you’re a Ninja Turtles fan, I hope you can still afford your insulin.

I’M SAYING IT’S KIND OF A LOT.

The reason they do this, of course, is because people continue to BUY them. And when there are stories every other day about some comic shop or another closing down or a publisher being unable to pay its creators, I can’t fault them for looking for ways to increase revenue. But the problem is that this simply bleeds money out of the existing fans until they get fed up and walk away entirely. And like the renumbering problem, this doesn’t do anything to actually get NEW fans into reading, which is what the long-term goal should be.

This is not to say that I hate variants in their entirety. I rather like them when they do something CLEVER with them, such as what I call “theme” months, where all the variants have a different trend. For instance, DC recently did a run of variants covers that were mock-ups of the packaging of the old Super Powers action figures. (I should point out that other publishers, including Marvel, have been doing action figure variants for a long time, but this was the first time I recall them being used as a monthly theme.) In October, there were a series of variants by artist Kelley Jones showing the DC heroes as kids in Halloween costumes. Marvel did a series not long ago of variant “homage” covers based on some of their old vampire comics, and another run that showed their characters facing off against Godzilla. That kind of stuff doesn’t really bother me, except for the fact that they add to the preposterous number of variants on the shelf.

I don’t know art, but I know what I hate. And I don’t hate this.

I also really like the “sketch” covers that have become popular in recent years. These are blank covers printed on a different cardstock that fans can use to draw their own artwork or have an artist draw something for them. They’re popular for commissions at comic book conventions and events like Free Comic Book Day, and I don’t think the blanks really cause a lot of confusion on the racks compared to the 30-plus X-Men covers. 

The worst part, I think, is that so many of these “variants” are barely worthy of being considered a separate cover. You commission a piece of art from an artist and you’ve got a cover. Print it with no logo or trade dress and it’s a “virgin” variant. Print it without colors and it’s a “sketch” variant. Print it with metallic ink and it’s a “foil” variant. You can crank out a dozen different covers with one sketch and people will continue to buy them. It’s insane.

I recognize that there are a lot of people who LIKE these variants, even if they aren’t MY thing. So in my capacity as the benevolent overlord of comic books, I don’t want to ban them entirely. Here are the restrictions I’ll put in place:

  • A standard issue of a comic book shall have no more than three covers: the “main” cover, a variant cover, and a “theme” variant for that month. 
  • First issues will be limited to five covers, including the theme cover.
  • Milestone issues, such as anniversaries, will be allowed extra variants consisting of no more than one-tenth of the number of issues the book has run. For instance, the 50th issue will be allowed 5 variants, the 100th issue will be allowed 10 variants, and so on. 
  • Retailer-exclusive variants will not count against the total. These are covers commissioned by – and only available from – specific retailers, such as an individual comic shop, store chain, or online retailer.
  • There will be no restrictions on “sketch” covers, nor will they count against the number of variants allowed. 

See? I can be as flexible as the next guy, provided the next guy isn’t Plastic Man.

Anyway, there we have it, guys. Comic books are fixed!

Well…okay, maybe not. There are still plenty of other things in the world of my favorite medium that need to be addressed. Other problems to solve, other fires to put out…but I’ve already gone on for nearly 3500 words, which is pretty massive for one of these Geek Punditry columns. So I think it’s time to put this topic aside, at least for now.

But that’s okay. After all, I’ve got to save something to write about when Geek Punditry #200 rolls around.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. His goal to take over all of social media after it has started to slide towards irrelevance continues. 

Geek Punditry #99: Blake’s Five Favorite Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade Displays

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Hello, everyone, and welcome once again to “Blake’s Five Favorites,” that semi-regular Geek Punditry mini-feature in which I pick some aspect of pop culture and just wax poetic about my five favorite examples of that thing. As always, “Five Favorites” is totally subjective. I’m not saying these are the BEST five examples, just that these are five that make ME smile…and it’s important to note that, when it comes to ranking things like this, I can be kind of fickle. If I were to write this column a week from now, I might pick five totally different examples.

Well…four different examples. Number one for this week holds a permanent place in my heart.

Next week is Thanksgiving, the second in the great Halloween-Thanksgiving-Christmas extravaganza that makes the last three months of the year my favorite time. Last year, if you’ll recall, I wrote about the sad dearth of Thanksgiving-related entertainment: with few movies other than Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, few specials beyond Peanuts and Garfield, and few bingeable TV shows other than Friends and Bob’s Burgers. But that doesn’t mean there’s NOTHING fun to watch for Thanksgiving, and this week I’m going to talk about one of my favorites: the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. This year is going to be the 98th annual parade, and I have to admit, I’m already kind of a-tingle looking forward to 2026 and wondering what they’ve got in store for the centennial edition of the greatest Thanksgiving tradition since Ben Franklin stuffed the first duck inside of George Washington’s chicken and then fed it to Alexander Hamilton’s turkey. Or whatever happened.

A tradition as precious as Uncle Fred making comments about Aunt Judy’s ‘vacation to Motel California” and making everyone feel awkward.

This week, I’m going to look back at the great parades I’ve watched over the years and talk about some of my favorite displays, be they floats, musical performances, or the legendary balloons. These will be in no particular order except for number one. I’m saving the best for last.

#5: The Spider-Man Balloon

I remember, for Spider-Man’s first crawl down the skies of New York in 1987. That first Spider-Man balloon was remarkably exciting for me, for reasons that are maybe a little difficult to articulate, especially to modern fans. It’s hard to remember, in this day and age when geek culture IS popular culture, that there was a time when things like comic books, sci-fi, and fantasy were looked down upon. They were considered “low” culture by the hoi polloi and expressing a love for such things was as good as placing a target on your back from the schoolyard bullies. So seeing Spider-Man appear in the Macy’s parade was…kind of a revelation. In a strange way, it was a sort of validation, seeing something that meant so much to me get mainstream attention. It was the first time I had an inkling that MY culture COULD be pop culture…and let’s face it, guys, the years since have proven me right.

Spidey’s original balloon lasted from 1987 until 1998. He came back in 2004 with a new, updated balloon that continued to fly along until 2014. And that was it…until next week.

“Peter One…Peter Two…Peter Three!”

A brand-new Spider-Man balloon is going to debut this year! Yes, May Parker’s favorite nephew is making his return to the Macy’s Parade for the first time in a decade, and I cannot wait to sit on the couch with my son and watch him soar across the sky once again. I don’t know how long Spidey Mark III will last, but I feel like the wallcrawler has become something of a perennial. And I can only hope that if Eddie ever has kids of his own, he’ll be watching Spider-Man on Thanksgiving day with them. 

#4: The Marching Bands

I was a band geek in school.

I know, it’s shocking, but try to compose yourself.

I was a band geek all through middle school, high school, college. And of course, that means I was a marching band geek. I spent a lot of Fridays and Saturdays glide-stepping across a football field, slinging my trombone and wearing pants that rode entirely too close to my nipples. And to this day, I still love watching a marching band…but I hate the fact that they never seem to get any love on TV. Nearly every one of these college football games we watch has at least ONE marching band out there at halftime, playing their hearts out. I’d love to see them get a little credit for once.

You laugh, but you’d be shocked at how many girls swooned over the guy who could play “Land of 1,000 Dances” on trombone.

…None. The number is zero.

So the Macy’s Parade is great because that actually happens. For one day a year, we get to watch as dozens of schools from across the country strut their stuff on the biggest stage a marching band can get. The thing to remember is that the kids you see in that parade busted their butts to get there. Not only have they given countless hours rehearsing music and practicing drills, but the schools also have to pay their own way to the parade. So bands do fundraisers of all types: car washes, bake sales, soda sales…even mattress sales seem to have become popular in recent years. For those of us watching at home, we see 30 seconds of a marching band performance, but that could be the result of up to two years of hard work, planning, fundraising, and rehearsal. I love to see them get to show their stuff, even if half the country uses their appearance to go baste the turkey. 

#3: The Marvel Superheroes Float

The same year that Spider-Man’s first balloon premiered, we got another Marvel presentation, the Marvel Universe float. The float rolled three times before retiring after 1989, but similar to the Spider-Man balloon itself, it left an indelible mark on my geek psyche. (Side note: I’m realizing that this column is getting much deeper into my assorted nerdities than I would have expected.) The float was full of costumed performers dressed as characters that – in the 80s – were pretty damn obscure to the general public. I mean…Dr. Strange? Wolverine? Who the hell would ever make a movie about THOSE guys, right?

Pictured: Life before High Definition

This was long before Marvel was purchased by the Walt Disney Corporation and Global Underground Shadow Government and Falafel Stand, so the production values were at a level that I would describe as “Six Flags Knock-Off Amusement Park Show.” The costumes look like they were sewed together by somebody’s mother, and calling the “stunt” work stunt work is a bigger gift than anything Santa could bring. Despite the incredible cheese factor, I’ve never forgotten how much I loved watching that float, and in the week before Thanksgiving every year, I still pull up the clip of the 1989 parade on YouTube and watch it again, immersing myself in lovely, lovely memories. 

#2: The Garfield Balloon

This is another one that scratches that nostalgia itch, but when I think about Macy’s parade balloons, if it’s not Spider-Man, the first thing that comes to mind is Jim Davis’s legendary fat cat. I know, in this day and age it’s not fashionable to be a fan of Garfield. It’s bland. It’s homogenized. And the most recent movie took WILD liberties with established series canon. But I feel like I need to remind you that I was born the year before the first Garfield comic strip came out. The cat and I literally grew up together, so I have a soft spot for him. Plus, the old Garfield and Friends cartoon show was actually really good, and the holiday specials were great.

Garfield never rides in the Canadian Thanksgiving parade because he hates Mondays.

All that said, I remember seeing Garfield in the Macy’s Parade for years. It was the sort of thing that felt like a perennial to me, something that was just always there and always would be. Looking back, I see that it wasn’t QUITE that constant, but he did have a heck of a run. The original Garfield balloon traveled down the streets with the parade from 1985 until 1989, with a second stint from 1992 through 1999. A new Garfield balloon, this time carrying his teddy bear Pooky, showed up in 2003 and lasted through 2006. 

It’s hard to explain what exactly it is about the Garfield balloon that I find so comforting. Yeah, the character is as corporate as it gets, and in fact, Jim Davis deliberately crafted the comic strip to be as inoffensive and all-encompassing as possible. But in a way, that’s kind of appropriate. Hell, the parade itself is put on by a department store, and every float and balloon comes with a sponsor whose name is announced on national television during the broadcast – are we really going to pretend we’re NOT watching a three-hour commercial every Thanksgiving morning? And for that reason, I think Garfield is actually kinda the perfect mascot for the whole shebang. So yeah, I love seeing that balloon for the same reason I get a little smile every time I’m reminded of the days when every other car on the road had a Garfield plush stuck against the rear window. It just kind of feels…right.

#1: Santa Claus

I mean, what else could possibly take the top spot on my rating of the greatest parts of the Thanksgiving parade? I’ve often said that I think gatekeeping is stupid and that anybody who tries to tell anyone else that they’re wrong to start celebrating Christmas “early” is only showing their own prejudices. That said, in my house, I don’t think it’s Christmastime until that last minute of the Macy’s parade, when Santa’s sleigh rolls down the streets of Manhattan. It’s at that moment that I really feel like the holiday season has “officially” begun and there’s no longer any rationale from any of those Scrooges who claim that it’s too early for Christmas to keep flapping their gums.

“Ho, ho, hooold on a second there, save me some pumpkin pie!”

Santa’s most famous ride is still a month out, of course, but seeing him in the parade reminds every kid in the world that he’s on his way, that it’s time to make a list, that they better start behaving themselves, consarn it. And it feels like THE most constant part of the parade to me. Floats and balloons come and go, you don’t see the same marching bands every year, the musical performances are carefully crafted to support whatever is hot on Broadway that season…but no matter what else is going on in the world and who else is being paid to show up in the parade, Santa Claus is always going to be there. Hell, the whole tradition is the centerpiece of the movie Miracle on 34th Street, and I’ll never get tired of either one of them.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. If he had a genie available to him, one of his wishes would be to create a character so universally beloved that they would be immortalized in the Macy’s parade. The next wish would be for an official Red Ryder, carbine action, 200-shot, range model air rifle, with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time.

Geek Punditry #97: Already Gone From a Theater Near Me

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Two things that people learn about me very quickly are that I’m a teacher and that I’m a nerd, and not in that order. In my classroom, I’ve got a corner behind my desk where I put my geekery on full display, with Superman figures, LEGO constructs, Star Trek models, and a whole bulletin board collage made of comic book images clipped from the likes of the Previews catalog (assembled by my wife each year when she comes in to help me get my classroom ready). The long and short of it is that nobody who walks into my room has any doubt as to what kind of stuff I’m into. And this often leads to fun conversations with my students about the movies, shows, and characters I like. Frequently, though, it also leads to conversations like the one I had a few days ago, when a student came up to me very excited and asked if I’d seen Venom: The Last Dance yet because she wanted to talk about it, and I had to sadly disappoint her and say, “No, I’ve got a kid, remember?”

Not pictured: parenting.

My son, of course, is the light of my life, but as I’ve mentioned here many times in the past, he has seriously curtailed my moviegoing. Erin and I rarely make it to the movies anymore, and it’s even rarer that we go to a movie we can’t bring seven-year-old Eddie to, so this is about the time of year where I start to take stock of all the recent releases I haven’t seen yet and trying to figure out how to prioritize them. I always want to watch as many new releases as I can, but going to the theater is rarely an option, and there are quite a few movies that I simply can’t watch with my son. This is why I still haven’t seen Deadpool and Wolverine, although thanks to the Internet I already knew about every surprise and cameo in that film approximately 20 minutes after the first screening let out, because people on the internet are jerks.

If I want to squeeze in these movies before the end of the year, I need to get started, not the least because in that window between Thanksgiving and Christmas I usually push aside new releases and just binge as much holiday content as I can. Sure, there are also new Christmas movies every year, but the ones I’m most interested in – such as The Best Christmas Pageant Ever and Red One – are theatrical releases, and 99 percent of the remaining Christmas movies are cozy romances from the Hallmark Channel or one of their increasing number of imitators. That’s not quite my style. 

As it stands right now, my Letterboxd list of movies I want to watch from 2024 is over twice as long as the list of movies that I’ve actually seen from 2024, so it’s time for me to prioritize. Keeping in mind that I have to check which movies are actually available via one of the assorted streaming services, and I may not be able to watch all of these anyway, let me start by figuring out which movies I can share with Eddie. Some are simple: he likes the Minions, so getting him to watch Despicable Me 4 should be no trick. Flow looks intriguing, and the visuals may just be the thing to hold his attention. I think the novelty will be enough to keep him interested during the unlikely Pharrell Williams LEGO-animated biopic Piece By Piece as well, so we’ll probably give that a try. And I’m personally dying to see The Wild Robot, which I think he’ll be into, even though when we gave him the choice between seeing that or TransFormers One in the theaters, he went for the major IP. 

If I’m watching a movie with the kid, it pretty much needs to look like this.

We haven’t had as much luck getting him to pay attention to live-action movies, though, so I don’t know if he’d be down for If or Harold and the Purple Crayon…on the other hand, he liked the first two movies, so Sonic the Hedgehog 3 looks like a no-brainer. And even though it’s a documentary, the kid loves airplanes, so I might take a chance and see if he’d be interested in The Blue Angels.

Speaking of documentaries, this has been a heck of a year for them. Two of the best movies I HAVE seen have been documentaries, the charming Jim Henson: Idea Man, and the magnificent Super/Man: The Christopher Reeve Story. But looking at my list of 2024 movies, I see several other documentaries waiting for my attention. Doc of Chucky is a mammoth five-hour deep dive into the Child’s Play horror franchise, similar to the huge documentaries Crystal Lake Memories (about the Friday the 13th films) and Never Sleep Again (detailing the Nightmare on Elm Street series). If it’s anything like those previous two documentaries, it’ll be a lot of interviews and discussions about the development, shooting, and legacy of those movies – sort of like the world’s longest DVD extra. Some people may not be into that kind of thing, but I can watch it for hours…and I’ll need to, if I want to get through the whole film. Other documentaries on my radar include In Search of Bass Reeves, the history of the legendary escaped slave who became one of the most storied lawmen in the old west, MoviePass, MovieCrash, detailing the short life and disaster of the MoviePass service, and the more obvious films Music By John Williams and STEVE! (martin) a documentary in 2 pieces. I’ll need to check on which of these are most safe to watch while the kid is bouncing around the house. If he starts humming John Williams music, that’s fine, but there are certain Steve Martin routines I don’t need him repeating as he walks around second grade.

These are all nonfiction, so watching them would count as educational.

Next up on my list are movies that I think will probably be safe ENOUGH to watch while Eddie is around, but that aren’t specifically FOR him. For instance, there was a whole Godzilla movie this year we didn’t get to – Godzilla/Kong: The New Empire, and that’s something that has to be on my end-of-year list if I’m to have any business calling myself a geek. I have similar feelings about Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!, although I’m a bit more reluctant to watch that one with Eddie. I don’t think he’ll get scared by it – my little dude has proven to be almost disturbingly fearless in the face of things like Spirit Halloween and guys in monster costumes – but once again, there’s language in there that I don’t quite want him to start repeating. I’ve heard good things about the action/comedy Fall Guy, though, so I’ll have to check on the language content to see if that would be an Eddie-safe viewing. (If you’ve already seen it, please feel free to expound in the comments.) 

Horror movies are an obvious no-go with the kid. If I am to watch those, it’ll likely be on my laptop while he’s watching cartoons or sports. The unwatched horror movies on this year’s list include Daddy’s Head, Night Swim, A Quiet Place Day One, Trap, The Substance, and Watchers, all of which I am resigned to not watching on the actual television. The same goes for darker actioners like Monkey Man, Love Lies Bleeding, or The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare. As for Alien: Romulus…maybe if we can get the kid to bed early some night. 

Man, you watch one alien invasion body horror flick with your second grader and everybody wants to make it into a THING.

It saddens me how relatively few comedies are being made these days, because I think the world needs more deliberate comedy in it as opposed to the ironic kind that real life continues to subject us to. That’s why one of the movies I’m most anxious to watch – if parenting ever gives me a chance – is Kevin Smith’s The 4:30 Movie. It seems as though the film is a sort of love letter to the moviegoing experience, especially as it was in the 1980s, and damned if that isn’t exactly what I want to watch. It’s Kevin Smith, so I expect there to be a degree of the crude humor he’s best known for, but his more recent films (like Jay and Silent Bob Reboot and Clerks III) have also displayed a surprising depth and heart that I hope he’s carried over to this new film. 

I haven’t even gotten around to most of this year’s comic book or superhero movies. In addition to the aforementioned Venom sequel and Deadpool and Wolverine, I have yet to watch Madame Web, Hellboy: The Crooked Man, Megamind Vs. The Doom Syndicate, or Joker: Folie a Deux. And admittedly, every one of these movies has received a heavy critical thrashing, but the comic book completist in me insists on watching them. Perhaps at least a little less divisive is DC’s two-part animated adaptation of Watchmen. This one particularly has me interested, as the script was written by J. Michael Straczynski, creator of Babylon 5 and a fine writer. This is the third Watchmen production, of course. First came the Zach Snyder movie, which I thought was okay, if a little TOO slavishly devoted to the source material right up until the end. Then there was the HBO miniseries, which wasn’t an adaptation at all but rather a sequel to the original graphic novel. It was magnificent, but no one has yet done an actual adaptation of the story that’s knocked it out of the park. Could Straczynski and director Brandon Vietti finally pull it off? 

If the internet is to be trusted, one of these is going to turn out to be the worst movie I see all year.

And finally, there are the “serious” films. The dramas. The award bait. I enjoy watching these things, but I know that even if there’s no objectionable content, my kid would lose interest in seconds and wander off to try to dismantle the refrigerator or something. So I wouldn’t even make the effort to watch a movie like Ghostlight in front of him – a drama about a construction worker who winds up in a local theater performing Romeo and Juliet with his own estranged daughter. Nor Miller’s Girl – a young writer gets mixed up in a project with her teacher, which made it to my list primarily on the strength of starring Jenna Ortega and Martin Freeman as the student and teacher, respectively. And DEFINITELY not Francis Ford Coppala’s sci-fi drama Megalopolis, a film which has garnered such divisive and vitriolic reviews that I feel compelled to watch it if for no other reason than intellectual curiosity. 

And the thing is, guys, even if I were to somehow manage to watch each and every film I’ve mentioned here, that still would only be about HALF of the films on my “To-Watch” list by the end of the year. I know I won’t get through the whole thing, I know it’s virtually impossible. So my task here, in the last lap of 2024, is to figure out which ones are both worthy of my time and to get in as many of the best ones as I can.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. The great thing about this weekly column is that sometimes he can use it to justify the sort of nonsense list-making he does all the time by calling it writing.