Disney

154-Deck the Halls With Nerdy Baubles (Falalalala lala lala)

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The other day when we decorated our Christmas tree, I opened up a few ornaments I bought weeks ago in preparation for this moment. One of them – it should be no surprise – was a Superman ornament from the new movie, poised to go on the tree in the midst of a half-dozen other Superman ornaments of various types and origin, including one of his s-shield, a LEGO Superman, and Krypto the Superdog, amongst others. The second newbie was from this year’s other great superhero movie, Fantastic Four: First Steps: a figure of my favorite Marvel character Benjamin J. Grimm, the ever-lovin’ blue-eyed Thing. And as I hung it on the tree, I was struck with a bit of a giggle as I realized that here I was, Baptised and confirmed Catholic, placing on my Christmas tree one of the most famously Jewish superheroes that ever existed.

“IT’S CAROLIN’ TIME!”

And I can’t help but think that Stan Lee would find that pretty amusing as well.

Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, Ben’s co-creators, were both Jewish, and although the classic comics never really made it explicit, there were a lot of things about Ben’s dialogue and backstory that coded him as a New York Jew. The comics didn’t deal with religion that much at the time, although by the 80s writers began to feel freer about incorporating religion as part of a character’s background. Kitty Pryde of the X-Men and Marc Spector, Moon Knight, were both marked as Jewish early in their careers, and existing heroes like Nightcrawler (also of the X-Men) and Daredevil had their own Catholic faith emphasized as major aspects of their characterization. The degree to which any character’s particular religious affiliation is relevant tends to wax and wane depending on the writer, but addressing these issues helped make the Marvel Universe as a whole feel more real in a way, as it was no longer ignoring such a major part of culture. All that said, it’s weird that it took 40 years, until the early 2000s, before Marvel published a story that specifically had the Thing make reference to his Jewish heritage.

Since then it’s come up far more often, including an intriguing story by Dan Slott where Ben got a Bar Mitzvah as an adult using the logic that becoming the Thing was sort of a second birth and the 13 years that had elapsed since then (in-universe, that is) allowed for that. I’m no Hebrew scholar so I’ve got no idea if that would fly in real life, but it was a great story all the same. At any rate, I think Stan would be fine with me putting Ben on the same tree as I put the little ornament that commemorated the 50th anniversary of our local Catholic church, the snowman bauble my son made for us in Kindergarten, the Peanuts gang, this weird Nicholas Cage ornament my wife thinks is absolutely hilarious, and the golden Enterprise Hallmark produced for Star Trek’s own 50th anniversary. Whether you yourself are religious or not, I feel like we nerds have embraced the holidays as another way to let our geek flags fly.

Guess which one of these is my wife’s favorite.

Hallmark is not the only company to have embraced this part of our culture, of course, but I feel like they’re probably the most recognizable. Every year, I have friends who eagerly await that moment – usually sometime in July – when Hallmark releases their catalogue of new ornaments that will be available for the holiday season. And there’s never any telling what you’re going to get, there are some things that are pretty reliable. That year’s big movies usually get a few ornaments, and there’s almost always stuff to be added to their collection of Star Wars and Star Trek decorations whether there was a new movie that year or not. And as they continue to milk those properties for every character, vehicle, and scenario they can possibly immortalize, they’ve gotten increasingly elaborate. This year’s offerings include a $100 ornament, full of lights and sound, of the scene in the first Star Wars movie where Chewbacca and R2-D2 are playing holographic chess, complete with an actual hologram function. And while that ornament may fall out of MY price range, I’ve got absolutely no doubt that they sold out.

It’s called “Let the Wookie Win.” “Wookie” is slang for “your desperate need to display your youth on a Douglas Fir.”

But Hallmark doesn’t stop at the usual. A cursory glance at their website reveals that this year’s offerings – in addition to the usual IP from Disney, Marvel, Star Wars, and DC Comics – also include the likes of Sonic the Hedgehog, Harry Potter, an XBox controller, Heinz Ketchup, Shrek, the NFL, Friends, and your favorite seasonal horror movie characters like M3gan, Chucky, and Michael Meyers – specifically from Halloween II. If you simply took every licensed ornament produced by Hallmark in the past two decades and put them on one enormous tree, you could show it to an alien as a perfect capsule summary of western culture in the 21st century. 

It’s not just Christmas trees, of course, but pretty much all aspects of holiday decorating allow for you to show off the kind of stuff that you’re into. We’ve always had Christmas inflatables in our yard, for instance. Over the years, those inflatables have included multiple Star Wars characters, sitting out there right next to the likes of Snoopy, Frosty the Snowman, Bluey, and a shark wearing a Santa hat. (My wife desperately tried to find oversized yellow Christmas light decorations to put behind the shark in an attempt to recreate the scene from Jaws in our yard, but she was unsuccessful before the shark’s motor failed and the inflatable decoration had to be retired. They don’t make ‘em like they used to.)

If you don’t have stuff like this on your lawn are you even really celebrating the birth of our Savior?

In my classroom, I’ve got a collection of geeky knickknacks (mostly – but not all – Superman-related) that I keep near my desk. Around the holidays, though, I break out specialized ones – monsters at Halloween, family groups for Thanksgiving. And now, at Christmas, my collectible display includes multiple DC and Marvel characters in Christmas outfits, Charlie Brown in his snow suit next to Snoopy sleeping on his decorated doghouse, and for a hint of traditionality, Santa Claus and Rudolph. Santa, although, is in New Orleans Saints gear, because we very much use the holidays as an excuse to mash together EVERYTHING we love. 

Harley is winking because she and Deadpool have shenanigans to get up to during my planning period.

And lest we forget, we don’t just decorate our environment, friends. We decorate ourselves. I’ve long prided myself on my collection of nerdy t-shirts, but at Christmas there’s a special subsection that gets broken out with Christmas-themed takes on the Flintstones, the Muppets, the Looney Tunes, Disney characters, and of course, my favorite superheroes. The “Ugly Sweater” trend gives us yet another opportunity to put ourselves on display. You can find designs dedicated to virtually any movie, TV show, or video game you can think of. Last year I broke down and ordered the Svengoolie Christmas sweater, wearing it any time it was cold enough outside to justify it. (I live in Louisiana, of course, so that only happened like twice. But still.) And of course, Santa hats are just one more excuse to customize the holidays. I’ve got a Superman Santa hat I’ve worn for many years, and just this week my wife got one in Harley Quinn colors. My friend Owen Marshall, who I know is reading this right now – hi, buddy! – has a collection of different Santa hats that could occupy an entire section of a Christmas museum. 

Only seven years old in this picture and he’s already looking away from his dad in embarrassment.

A few years ago, my brother introduced me to RSVLTS, a company that makes very cool, comfortable shirts in deliciously nerdy patterns, and those shirts have come to dominate my casual wardrobe. I often hold back on buying their seasonal shirts, as they’re kind of expensive for a shirt I can only wear a month of out of the year, but I eventually acquired a shirt of Mickey and Minnie ice-skating, a great pattern of the characters from Rankin and Bass’s Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and last month my sweet wife got me my favorite Disney character, Scrooge McDuck, on a RSVLTS shirt celebrating his definitive performance as Ebenezer Scrooge from the motion picture Mickey’s Christmas Carol.

Imagine this shirt, but with my head sticking out of it.

RSVLTS does not pay me for my frequent endorsements, but damn it, they should.

The point is, we all celebrate the holidays in our own ways, and that’s as it should be. And one of the things I like about them the most is the opportunity for people to use them to show off who they are. Put out your geekiest ornaments and your nerdiest lawn decorations. Wear your wildest shirts and hats. And let your geek flag fly. Christmas should be a celebration of love, and while that should PRIMARILY be the people we love (you know who you are), I think there’s room in it for the things we love as well.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. If Santa is listening, he’s still got his eye on that G.I. Joe aircraft carrier. Everybody reading this knows what he’s talking about.

Geek Punditry #153: You Don’t Want Us Exposing Ourselves

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My “Time of Death” in this year’s Mariahpocalypse came relatively early. It was Dec. 4, at 8:56 p.m., and I was taken out when her song was used in the background of a reel I scrolled across on Facebook, which – as far as I can tell – only popped up on my page at all because the person who made it was showing off a Christmas Supergirl costume and had tagged James Gunn. I am, however, still active in Whamageddon as of this writing.

Who would you rather have stalking your dreams — her or Freddy Krueger?

If none of that makes sense to you, let me explain. Whamageddon is a little game that has become popular at Christmastime over the last few years. The goal is to try to make it from December 1st until midnight on Christmas Eve without hearing the song “Last Christmas” by Wham! It’s not easy. They play the song on the radio all the time. It can pop up on the speakers in a store when you’re out shopping. The song exists in aerosol form, floating through the air, and at any moment may attack you like a swarm of angry hornets. Only the original recording counts, mind you – covers are fair game – but as soon as you recognize the song, you’ve lost. An optional rule is reporting your “Time of Death” on social media when it happens. Mariahpocalypse is, of course, the same game, but substitutes the song “All I Want For Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey, a song which is so ubiquitous at this time of year that odds are you have already heard it seven times while reading this paragraph.

Why those songs specifically? A friend of mine asked this the other day, even sharing the YouTube link to the “Last Christmas” music video. (Don’t worry – I didn’t click on it. Just seeing the link doesn’t eliminate you from the game, only hearing the song does.) His argument was that it doesn’t make sense because it’s “a great song.” And you know, it’s really not bad. It wouldn’t be on my top ten list of Christmas songs, but it’s certainly not at the bottom. That space is solely reserved for John Lennon, whose “Happy Xmas (War is Over)” is so gratingly depressing and self-absorbed that it has ironically been banned by the Geneva Conventions. As for Mariah – YOU might not like that song, but it’s clear that SOMEBODY does, because even now, 31 years after the song’s initial release, Forbes magazine estimates that she makes between $2.5 million and $3 million every year in royalties from that alone. If that doesn’t sound like a lot, keep in mind that the music industry is very different than it used to be. Sales of physical media are meager now, and to make $3 million on streaming a song would have to be played – and this is not a joke, I looked it up – approximately 687,000,000 times. That means every person in the United States would have to stream it at least TWICE, including your Great Aunt Mildred, who thinks that “streaming” is something she needs to talk to her urologist about. 

So the problem is obviously not that people don’t like it. I would argue that the reason Wham and Mariah have been targeted by this game is actually the opposite: they are TOO popular. So popular that, unless you’re really a fan of the songs or the musicians themselves, they start to get on your nerves. The songs, simply, have been overexposed.

“Guys, what are we doing here? I thought he was writing about Christmas this week.”

The truth is, any media runs the risk of an overdose if you see it too much. Last year, for example, my son discovered the Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles animated series on Paramount+, and he fell in love with it. The show is a spinoff of the feature film Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem from 2023, picking up where the movie left off and keeping the same tone, animated style, and most of the voice cast. I’d enjoyed the movie and I was quite happy to discover that I enjoyed the show as well.

The first time.

But as anyone with children can tell you, if a kid really likes something they don’t want to watch it just once. Oh no. They cycle back to the beginning and start over again. And this is what Eddie started to do. Once he reached the end of the final episode, he’d roll right into episode 1 and start watching the show over, to the point of excluding everything else. For over a month, Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was the only thing he wanted to watch AT ALL, and even though I liked the show, I got tired of it VERY fast. It was made worse by the fact that there is only one season of the show so far, only 12 episodes, so he could cycle through the entire thing VERY quickly. I would pick him up from school and when he’d get home he would immediately go back to whatever episode he was watching when he was bundled out the door that morning. When it got to the point that my wife and I were saying the jokes out loud to one another ahead of time, we knew something had to be done. We tried to convince him to try other Ninja Turtle cartoons – there are, and this is a rough estimate, 17 trillion of them — and even if it was still all mutants all the time, it would be nice to at least not have to watch the same 12 episodes over and over. These efforts were met with failure however. After an episode or two of whatever show we put in front of him, he would invariably demand that we cycle back to Tales. Adding the movie into the rotation only gave us slight relief. 

This is the point in the story where certain members of the audience are thinking, “Well YOU are the adults. Why didn’t you just TELL him to watch something else?” These are a very specific subset of audience members that I like to refer to as “people who do not have children.” The rest of the audience knows EXACTLY why we didn’t just tell him to watch something else. Regardless, this went on for some time until football season started up and he was distracted by sports, finally breaking the cycle.

For some reason, we experienced this same phenomenon again THIS year, except this time instead of the Turtles, it was reruns of the game show Supermarket Sweep. I’m already trying to find a strategy to distract him after the Super Bowl this year so we don’t get stuck again.

The point is, even the best cartoon, movie, or song will become tedious if you are exposed to it too often. The human brain craves variety. We want to be entertained, yes, but entertainment is often predicated on surprise, on the unpredictability of what we’re watching. Sure, there’s such a thing as a “comfort show.” Shows like Friends, The Office, or Bob’s Burgers have devoted, almost militant fan bases that can just keep watching those shows over and over again, watching almost nothing else. In fact, there have been studies that indicate watching a comfort show is a way of relieving anxiety, because you know what’s coming and because revisiting them fires the same chemicals in the brain as you get from spending time with family and friends. That’s right – you love going back to the Belcher family because your brain thinks it’s your OWN family. 

“Ya heah that, Bobby? They think we’re FAMILY!”

However, you may notice that the shows that make this list – that echelon where a devoted section of the fan base can cycle through them again and again – are almost exclusively shows that were produced for many years. Friends had 236 episodes, The Office 201, and Bob’s Burgers – which is still on the air and still in production – aired episode #305 last weekend. Even if you picked one of these shows and watched nothing else, it would take the average person with a job and normal activities weeks or even months to get through the entire thing before you would cycle back to episode one. Fans of one-season wonders like Firefly may love their show, but I don’t know any Browncoats who just watch the 14 episodes and one movie over and over again without any other entertainment in their life. 

There’s also, if we’re being totally honest here, a bit of a hipsterish anti-popularity vibe when it comes to things that become true cultural icons. If you were alive at any point in the last dozen or so years, you may have heard of a little Disney movie called Frozen. It doesn’t matter if you personally have had children or were a child at any point in this time period, it was absolutely inescapable. A month before the movie came out we all had the soundtrack beamed directly into our brains telepathically. The movie won awards, it produced a mountain of merchandise, and John Travolta somehow egregiously mangling Idina Menzel’s name at the Oscars is perhaps the most entertaining thing that has happened at the award ceremony in the last three decades, or at least until they accidentally tried to give “Best Picture” to La La Land that one time. 

If your kids ask what 2013 looked like, just show them this.

But with the indisputable popularity of Frozen came a backlash. If you say that you like that movie in modern company, you WILL be met with a certain derision. People will tell you that THEY never thought it was THAT good. Mention how you appreciated the fact that it didn’t have a traditional “Disney Princess”-style love story and someone will appear behind you as though you’d said “Candyman” three times in order to inform you that Wreck-It Ralph and Big Hero Six didn’t have love stories either. Start humming a few bars of “Let it Go” and a coven of Disney Witches will try to trap you in a circle and summon the ghost of Lin-Manuel Miranda, which REALLY irritates him because he’s still alive. 

But the thing is, guys, Frozen is a good movie. Like, it objectively is. The animation is gorgeous, the songs are catchy and memorable, the vocal performances by Menzel and Kristen Bell are phenomenal, and the story is not only atypical of what we expected from a Disney Princess movie but at the same time was profoundly moving and had a wonderful message about love and acceptance. But you absolutely are not allowed to say that in certain circles without somebody grinding up a DVD of Tangled into powder and trying to force you to snort a line.

The point is, it’s okay to get tired of something. If you watch or listen to anything too often, odds are you’re going to want to put it aside and watch something else, and that’s perfectly fine. That’s normal. It’s even okay if you get so sick of something that you never want to watch it again. But that’s not an actual metric of QUALITY. Sure, there are some things whose popularity is inexplicable, but you’re not a better person than somebody else because you don’t like them. And while games like Whamageddon are fun, that shouldn’t be taken as a statement that the songs are bad, just that they’ve maybe gotten a little more air time than we would like.

And you know the good thing about losing Mariahpocalypse on Dec. 4? That means I’ve got three whole weeks until Christmas in which I’m safe to listen to the song as much as I want. 

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. He hasn’t watched the movie, but he suspects that a lot of the comments he’s made about overexposure could also be applied to the film K-Pop Demon Hunters. 

Geek Punditry #150: The Year-End Cinema Scramble

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Towards the end of last year, as my most stalwart of followers certainly remember, I wrote a column about all of the movies that had come out in 2024 that I hadn’t gotten around to seeing yet. To no one’s surprise, I still haven’t gotten to see most of them. There are just so many things to watch, so many movies and shows that are pulling at my attention, and I’ve got a kid running around that not only limits what I can watch while he’s awake and paying attention, but also means that there are a LOT of sports on TV in our house. Not to mention the fact that I’ve been doing my “Year of Superman” thing since January, so a not-inconsiderable amount of my viewing time has been devoted to that in one way or another.

To date, I have seen 50 percent of these films.

2025 has not been different from 2024: there are dozens of movies that hit the box office (or streaming services) this year that I sincerely intend to watch, but simply haven’t gotten around to yet. Before I delve into those, though, let’s do a quick list of those movies I DID watch from last year’s list and, ultimately, what I thought of them:

  • Venom: The Last Dance-Not bad, but probably the least impressive of the trilogy.
  • Deadpool and Wolverine-Funny and full of the kind of delicious meta-commentary that only Deadpool can make work. 
  • Red One-Cute, unremarkable, but not deserving of some of the hate it gets on the internet.
  • Despicable Me 4-Better than 3, but I still probably wouldn’t bother with these movies if my son didn’t like them.
  • Flow-Technologically and visually, a masterpiece, although I thought the story was weak.
  • Sonic the Hedgehog 3-Make it make sense that this series keeps being entertaining.
  • MoviePass, MovieCrash-Intriguing look at how a system that was always doomed to failure wound up failing.
  • Music By John Williams-Nothing particularly revelatory in this documentary, but still a lovely watch.
  • Godzilla/Kong: The New Empire-Much as I love giant monster movies, this one felt like more of the same.
  • Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!-Not as good as the original, but as far as legacy sequels go, it’s a pretty good one.
  • A Quiet Place Day One-Probably the most character-driven film in this series so far, and that’s a plus.
  • The Substance-Incredible and absolutely worth every bit of praise it’s gotten.
  • The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare-Made me want to read the book, which you can imagine, is high praise.
  • Alien: Romulus-If you’re going to keep making Alien movies you gotta find something new to do with them. I haven’t watched the new Hulu series, but I suspect that it was better than this film.
  • The 4:30 Movie-Tender, sweet, without being saccharine. When Kevin Smith really speaks from the heart, there are few that do it better.
  • Madame Web-The internet told me this was the worst movie ever made. They were wrong. It’s really more bland and generic than actively bad. 
  • Joker: Folie a Deux-This was a thing that happened.

You know, looking back, I actually got around to more of last year’s list than I would have expected, which is a nice feeling. Of course, while I was busy watching the movies that came out LAST year, movies from THIS year just started piling up on me. Most of the reasons I don’t go to the movies as much as I used to haven’t changed: price, time, availability, and so forth. One thing, however, HAS changed. My son is eight years old now, and he’s gotten better about making it through a movie, especially a movie he’s excited about. This year my wife and I managed to take him to both Superman (naturally) and Fantastic Four: First Steps, in addition to the usual assortment of kids’ animated movies. 

I consider it a legitimate moral failure that I haven’t seen this movie yet.

One such movie we did NOT get around to, though, was The Day the Earth Blew Up: A Looney Tunes Movie. Much as I wanted to support it in theaters, time was not on my side, and it’s still on my list of end-of-year films I haven’t gotten to yet. As is Pixar’s newest, Elio, a movie that seemed to come and go with no notice whatsoever. But I’ve heard from a few people who actually saw it that they liked it, and I’m hoping I can get Eddie to join me for a viewing before the year runs out. He’s also excited about Zootopia 2, so we may make a movie date out of that one. I would also like to show him director Steve Hudson’s Stitch Head, which looks to be kind of a kids’ take on Frankenstein. And although it doesn’t really seem like my kind of movie, everybody on the planet except for me seems to have gone wild over K-Pop Demon Hunters on Netflix, and I feel almost obligated to watch it out of curiosity, if nothing else. 

Stop trying to tell me this was a bad movie. You didn’t see this movie. NOBODY saw this movie.

This year also brought – as years tend to do – a bunch of sequels. And if it’s a sequel to a movie I actually like, I’ll watch it. But I’m also the kind of nerd who prefers to re-watch the previous film (or films) in a series BEFORE watching the sequel, especially if it’s been a long time. So that, in addition to the usual problems of availability and time, are the reason I have yet to get to the “requel” of I Know What You Did Last Summer or the more direct sequels like 28 Years Later, Black Phone 2, Nobody 2, the Disney hit Freakier Friday, or the Disney flop Tron: Ares. A brief note about Tron: I love the original and I greatly enjoyed Tron: Legacy. I know Ares crashed and burned at the box office, but this has absolutely no impact on my desire to watch it. I don’t despise Jared Leto just because the Internet tells me to and, once this movie lands on Disney+, I fully intend to watch and evaluate it on its own merits. And you can’t stop me. Nyeah. 

There’s also Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Movie, which hasn’t dropped on Netflix yet, but is on my list. The first Knives Out was absolutely astounding, one of the best mysteries I’ve seen in ages (and perhaps THE best mystery/comedy I’ve ever seen). Glass Onion, the second Benoit Blanc mystery, still entertained me, but I didn’t quite find it up to the level of the original. I’m hoping that Rian Johnson and Daniel Craig bounce back with this third installment. 

Netflix, as a studio, has absolutely loaded me with mystery movies this year that I just haven’t gotten to yet. In addition to Wake Up Dead Man, I’ve also got my eye on The Woman in Cabin 10. This one stars Keira Knightley as a journalist who sees a passenger go overboard on a cruise ship, then gets caught up in the question of what’s going on. Chris Columbus directed The Thursday Murder Club, a crime comedy about a group of senior mystery enthusiasts who get swept into a real life murder. The cast is incredible – Helen Mirren, Pierce Brosnan, Ben Kingsley, Celia Imrie, David Tennant, Naomi Ackie – why the hell haven’t I watched this yet?

It’s Netflix’s fault I haven’t watched this yet, not mine.

I can tell you exactly why I haven’t watched Netflix’s Frankenstein yet: because they dropped it in NOVEMBER. What a dumb move. I couldn’t be more excited to watch Guillermo del Toro’s take on my favorite monster of all time, but I’ve had my hands full the last few weeks. Why on Earth wouldn’t they put this out in October and play up the Halloween angle? Granted, they’re the ones running a billion-dollar streaming service and I’m the guy writing blogs about it for free, but I think we can all agree that I am far wiser than they are.

Speaking of horror, Frankenstein isn’t the only movie that slipped past me this year. Good Boy, the horror film told from the point of view of a loyal dog, has been on my radar for a few years now, ever since I heard the premise. It’s gotten rave reviews, and with a runtime of only 73 minutes, I’ll be kind of mad with myself if I don’t sneak it in before the end of the year. Similarly, I’m interested in the slasher throwback Marshmallow, the Shudder film Night of the Reaper, and the survival horror video game adaptation Until Dawn. 

I’m saving this one for a day where I want to reduce myself to a mewling infant.

And the documentaries! I haven’t even GOTTEN to the documentaries yet! Prime Video has given us John Candy: I Like Me, a movie that seems to have left everybody who has watched it so far in tears. I’m probably going to wait until school lets out for Thanksgiving and then do a double feature of this one with the movie that gave us the title quote, the brilliant Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. 

I’ve got no such excuse, though, for sleeping on Jaws at 50, a documentary about one of the greatest movies ever made, or George A. Romero’s Resident Evil, which is a documentary about a movie that was NEVER made. That’s a relatively small subgenre of entertainment documentaries, but it’s one I’ve always enjoyed. Prime Video has also given us When We Went MAD!, a documentary about the history of the magazine that we all thought was hilarious when we were nine years old. I’ll be honest, I fell out of love with Mad Magazine ages ago (and re-reading some of their stories this summer during my Year of Superman did not reignite the love affair), but a documentary about comics is always going to get a view from me.

Saying that this one “aged like milk” may actually be considered a compliment.

Speaking of comics, I did a lot better this year at watching the superhero movies that came out…well, either that or there just weren’t as many of them. But looking at my list of movies that I missed this year, there are only three superhero movies I didn’t get around too, two of which are animated Batman movies. Batman Ninja Vs. Yakuza League and Aztec Batman: Clash of Empires are both “Elseworlds”-style takes on the character, plucking him out of Gotham City and putting him into feudal Japan and the time of the Spanish conquistadors, respectively. The concept of Batman, in and of itself, is flexible enough that these things are usually at least interesting. Then there’s the long-awaited remake of The Toxic Avenger, which has finally been taken off the shelf and released after two or three years of languishing. I’m very curious to see if the legendarily cheesy Troma Studios hero will hold up to a larger budget.

OOOOH, because if you take the “e” out of the parentheses the title is — NOW I get it!

As for low budgets, there are several indie movies that got my attention this year, movies I read about online or heard discussed in podcasts, that I haven’t watched. Jonathan L. Bowen’s The Comic Shop, for example, or the British comedy Bad Apples about a teacher who accidentally abducts her worst student and then finds that suddenly her class is more manageable. Dropout comedian Isabella Roland wrote and starred in the comedy D(e)AD, about a woman whose family is haunted by her father’s ghost – everyone except for her. There’s also Hamnet, a drama about the tragedy BEHIND William Shakespeare’s Hamlet, and John-Michael Powell’s crime drama Violent Ends. I can’t tell you too much about any of these because I don’t KNOW much, except that I heard enough about them to have my curiosity piqued and put them on my watchlist. 

Whatever bastard designed this did the human equivalent of putting a dog on the poster. You know what you’re in for.

Finally, in case you didn’t know, I’m kind of a fan of Stephen King. And this year has been awash in King content, with the new It TV prequel Welcome to Derry now running on HBO Max and no less than FOUR big-screen adaptations of his work, of which I have seen exactly one. The Monkey. Which I liked, but which was VERY different from the short story it’s based on. That means I still need to get to The Life of Chuck, based on a novella that I thought was pretty good, but the film is directed by Mike Flanagan, which means it’s probably brilliant. Francis Lawrence directed The Long Walk, an adaptation of one of King’s bleakest stories (originally published under his Richard Bachman pseudonym), and I look forward to seeing Mark Hamill playing the bad guy again – because despite most people thinking of him as Luke Skywalker, real ones know he’s actually the best Joker. And lest I forget Edgar Wright directed a remake of another Bachman book, The Running Man, a sci-fi action film rather than horror, but with trailers that look like an awful lot of fun.

The point is, I DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO WATCH ALL OF THE MOVIES.

As always, I’m going to do my best to get through as many of these (and the two dozen or so other movies that are on my list that I didn’t mention) between now and the time my Christmas vacation ends in early January, but who knows how many I’ll actually get to? In the meantime, if there are any particularly good movies that came out this year that I didn’t mention that you think I haven’t seen yet, let me know. What’s adding a few more films to a list I’m never going to reach the end of anyway?

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. He needs to go to the opposite of that planet from Interstellar, some place where he can be there for five minutes and have time to watch 12 month’s worth of movies. He hears Detroit feels like that sometimes. 

Geek Punditry #148: The Mount Rushmore of Halloween Cartoons

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By the time this is posted it will be the afternoon of Oct. 31st, which of course is the day that all of us – people of all shapes, sizes, religions, creeds, and soda preferences – come together and celebrate that most important of occasions, the birthday of Vanilla Ice. For many of us, though, it’s also Halloween, and at this VERY moment (assuming you read this as soon as it’s posted) I am scrolling through the options on my Plex library trying to decide which cartoons to watch with my son to get us ready before it’s time to take him trick-or-treating. This is harder than you may think. You see, while there are plenty of creepy cartoons to choose from, on Halloween itself I like to limit myself to those cartoons that actually take place ON Halloween…and the number there is smaller than you may realize. Christmas, as I always say, is easy. There are a thousand Christmas specials and hundreds of thousands of Christmas episodes of various TV series. Halloween, though, for all its popularity, doesn’t have quite as many to choose from. In an odd way, I sort of blame that on the universality of the holiday. You can put on any ghost story or monster movie and get a Halloween feel, which means there’s less of an impetus to evoke the holiday itself.

But I wanna evoke, dammit. I wanna get my impetus out and evoke something. So as you put together the goodie bags for the trick-or-treaters, carve your turnips into Jack-O-Lanterns (or pumpkins, for you provincial types), and iron the wrinkles out of your Dracula cape, what are the best cartoons to put on in the background? I’ve looked at the list and picked my top four. There will probably not be any surprises on this list, but that’s not the point – in the pantheon of Halloween cartoons, these are the greatest, the most iconic, the most seasonal. In my humble opinion, of course, which is the only one that actually matters here, since this is my blog.

Here we are: the Mount Rushmore of Halloween Cartoons.

“The Great Pumpkin flies out of the Pumpkin Patch and brings us an OBSCENE amount of merchandise.”

It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown (1966)

I told you up front there weren’t going to be any surprises, and it would be disingenuous of me to pretend otherwise. This was the third special based on Charles Schultz’s Peanuts comic strip (following A Charlie Brown Christmas and the lesser-known Charlie Brown’s All-Stars) and is considered by many to be the best of them all. On the night it first aired, a whopping 60 years ago this week, it was watched by 49 percent of American homes that were watching television. That means that if you lined up everybody in America on Oct. 28, 1966 and asked them if they watched Charlie Brown the night before, nearly HALF of them would ask you who the hell you were and how you got the authority to make them all line up like that.

We all know the story, of course – on Halloween night, Charlie Brown and the gang are making their preparations to go trick-or-treating…all except for Linus, that is. The wisest of the characters in Schulz’s strip, Linus has somehow conjured up an entire mythology surrounding the Great Pumpkin, who chooses the “most sincere” pumpkin patch to rise out of on Halloween night and give presents to all the children who are there waiting for him. The special raises a number of theological questions, most glaringly that of how one measures the sincerity of a pumpkin patch, but that’s not the point. Little Linus, dauntless in his faith, heads out to the pumpkin patch with Charlie Brown’s sister Sally, spurred on by a crush on him that no doubt would have gotten her into serious trouble if these characters were ever allowed to grow up and go to college. 

As Linus and Sally freeze in the pumpkin patch, the rest of the kids go trick-or-treating. The neighborhood adults all for some reason have rocks just to give to that round-headed Brown kid (you can tell it’s him because his ghost costume has too many holes), and Snoopy puts on his World War I Flying Ace outfit to have an imaginary dogfight. 

The special is a classic for a reason. From a standpoint of loving the characters, this is one of the most perfect encapsulations of the Peanuts gang and who they are – Charlie Brown is down on his luck, Lucy yanks the football away from him, Snoopy’s imagination is in overdrive, and of course, Linus and Sally’s story showcases them better than any other. The animation is gorgeous and the music, by Vince Guaraldi, is nothing short of iconic. The version of “Linus and Lucy” – which most people just think of as the “Peanuts theme” – is perhaps the greatest version Guaraldi ever recorded, adding in a flute part that perfectly mirrors the main theme. And you genuinely care about the characters. After the special aired, the studio actually started getting packages of candy in the mail from viewers who were upset that all Charlie Brown got when he went trick-or-treating was a sack full of rocks. That means that if you lined up everyone in America on Oct. 28, 1966, and asked them if they felt bad for Charlie Brown, nearly half of them would ask you to stop lining them up, for God’s sake, what kind of bizarre godlike powers do you HAVE, anyway?

What’s more, this was the first Halloween special ever broadcast on television, and opened the floodgates for all the others. There had been a few holiday specials before, most notably the original Charlie Brown Christmas and assorted Rankin and Bass Christmas specials, but nobody had put forth that kind of effort on Halloween before. But not only did It’s the Great Pumpkin give birth to the Halloween special, it also put a spark under the concept of Halloween itself, a holiday that had gone into decline during the lean years of the Great Depression and World War II, and had only gotten a recent bump thanks to another cartoon that we’ll mention later on in this list. But once families had an annual dose of Charlie Brown to look forward to, Halloween began to take off again. Not only is this a great special, but in a real way, it may have saved Halloween itself. And it’s also — fun fact — the film I have logged most often on Letterboxd since joining the platform back in 2014 — a whopping 18 times. Well, probably 19, by the time you read this.

“I TOLD you not to eat lasagna after 11 p.m.”

Garfield’s Halloween Adventure (1985)

Nineteen years after Charlie Brown taught us to love trick-or-treating again, Jim Davis’s Garfield told kids across America that it was okay to be scared. This special originally aired on Oct. 30, 1985, and I remember many years growing up when it was paired with the Charlie Brown special, making for a delicious hour of cartoon goodness every October. On the morning of Halloween, Garfield is woken up by Binky the Clown, the world’s most obnoxious kids’ show host (until Blippi, anyway) telling him that this is the night when he can go out to the streets and load up on candy. The prospect of free food is all it takes to get Garfield to put forth a little effort, and he decides that if he ropes Odie into going along with him he can get TWICE as much candy. The two of them put pirate costumes and head out into the night, loading up on sweets. The classic Garfield greed kicks in, though, when he decides to take a boat across the river to hit even more houses, only to get stuck on an island featuring a rundown old mansion. Inside that house is a very old man with a very, very scary story.

People mock Garfield today. The comic strip, they say, is stale and unfunny. Jim Davis perfectly formulated the comic to be as inoffensive as possible, appealing to the widest number of people, and as such sacrificed any edge that it may have had. These people are right, and I’m certain Jim Davis weeps profusely over his choices, wiping his tears with the plethora of million-dollar bills he has lying around as he stares out the window of his private jet, eating Waygu steaks off gold plates and drinking 190-year-old wine out of diamond-encrusted goblets. In the earlier days of the strip, though, there WAS still an edge, and that was especially true of the animated specials. They put Garfield’s legendary cynicism front and center, with no posturing about goodwill or making things fun for everybody, no waxing nostalgic over Halloweens past. No, this is a hero who is in it for one thing and one thing only: candy. He makes no apologies for this, and we love him for it.

But over the 24 minutes of this cartoon, that classic Garfield hunger is forced to take a back seat when we get to the mansion and we enter one of the most legitimately creepy scenes I’ve ever seen in a kids’ show. The old man weaves a story of a band of pirates who buried a treasure on that very island 100 years prior, with the promise to return that very night. Garfield and Odie are suitably disturbed and try to leave, only to find HOLY CRAP THIS CARTOON ABOUT A CAT THAT EATS LASAGNA IS FULL OF GHOSTS! And we aren’t talking about Casper and his buddies, friends, these ghosts are creepy, chilling, spectral apparitions that makes you long for the days when network television was actually willing to put images into a children’s animated special that would potentially give them nightmares the way that God intended. These nautical spooks look like the Pirates of the Caribbean ghouls, only creepier, because one of them looks like he’s going to eat Odie. 

In addition to the surprisingly effective story and phenomenal animation, the special is full of fantastic music as well. Composed by Ed Bogas and Desiree Goyette, we get three classic songs – two sung by Lou Rawls and one by Garfield’s voice actor Lorenzo Music – that are absolute bangers that deserve to be on your Halloween playlist, except for the fact that for some insane reason none of them appear to be on Spotify or, for that matter, anywhere else except for this special…which for some reason also doesn’t appear to be streaming anywhere. This is why you can’t abandon physical media, friends.

“This is an intervention, Don. We’re here to talk to you about your anger management problem.”

Trick or Treat (1952)

I mentioned before that It’s the Great Pumpkin helped bring back the custom of trick-or-treating after it kind of faded during the 30s and 40s. It didn’t do it alone, though. The tradition had gotten a bump several years before, and without the 1952 Disney short Trick or Treat, it’s conceivable that the practice may have died off entirely before Charlie Brown managed to take it off of life support in 1966. 

On Halloween night, Donald Duck’s nephews are trick-or-treating when their uncle decides to prank them, putting firecrackers in their bags instead of candy, dumping a bucket of water on them, and then sending them away laughing. Donald was kind of an asshole in these old cartoons, if you didn’t know. Anyway, the whole thing is observed by a witch named Hazel – voiced by the immortal June Foray – who decides to help the boys get a little payback. When Donald tries pranking Hazel, not realizing she’s a REAL witch, she whips up a magic potion that allows her to control Donald’s legs, and then the fun REALLY begins.

This is Disney at its peak, with some of its best animation (courtesy of director Jack Hannah), and an amazing title song by Paul J. Smith that warns the listener you need to be generous on Halloween night or face the consequences. I don’t know that Michael Dougherty was inspired by this cartoon when he made his 2007 Halloween anthology movie Trick ‘r Treat – a film with slashers and werewolves and vengeful revenants which is most certainly NOT for kids – but they share the same thesis, so I choose to believe the connection was deliberate. 

Technically, he’s still having a better Halloween than Laurie Strode.

Broom-Stick Bunny (1956)

Just four years later, June Foray would voice Witch Hazel again…but not for Disney. This time it was Warner Bros. director Chuck Jones who would recruit her for the Bugs Bunny Halloween short Broom-Stick Bunny. This is perhaps not as well known as the other three cartoons on this Mount Rushmore. In fact, it’s not even my favorite creepy short from the Looney Tunes catalogue. It is, however, the greatest Looney Tunes cartoon that is specifically about Halloween, rather than just co-starring Gossamer or a vampire or something, so it cuts to the head of the line.

In this one, Witch Hazel is conjuring up a potion when she gets a visit from Bugs Bunny, wearing a witch costume, as he’s trick-or-treating. Hazel mistakes him for a fellow witch and is disturbed when her magic mirror suggests that he (or at least, his mask) is uglier than she is, so she invites him in with a plan to hit him with a beauty potion to protect her own reputation. The cartoon devolves into one of those wild, madcap Bugs Bunny chase scenes as Hazel goes after him with a meat cleaver, because back in the 50s you COULD have a cartoon character go after somebody with a meat cleaver without being worried about “offending” somebody. The cartoon ends with Hazel accidentally drinking the beauty potion and – in a joke that there’s no chance in hell a modern kid would get – transforms into a gorgeous redhead that is actually a caricature of June Foray herself. 

This was the first time Foray did a voice for Chuck Jones, who supposedly thought it would be hilarious to cast Disney’s Witch Hazel to play his OWN Witch Hazel. Foray went along with the gag, although she differentiated the two by using a British accent for the Disney witch and an American accent for the Looney Tunes version. More importantly, this short struck up a collaboration between the two – Jones began using Foray more and more often and became a regular not only in his work, but also at Warner Bros. animation until her death in 2017. 

As always, friends, recommendations are welcome. What are some cartoons set on Halloween that you would place on your own Rushmore? 

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. He regrets to this day that Who Framed Roger Rabbit? didn’t take the chance to have June Foray do a Witch-Off between the two Hazels. 

Geek Punditry #142: Three Wishes Presents 80s Reboots

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This week the world of pop culture was totally rocked by the news that one of the greatest underrated movies of the 80s is FINALLY getting a sequel. Director Nick Castle’s 1984 science fiction epic The Last Starfighter is being revisited, after over four decades, in a new comic book series by Mad Cave Studios and the planet absolutely REJOICED. 

Well it rocked MY world, anyway.

I don’t give a damn what you’ve been told, THIS is what Epic actually looks like.

I loved The Last Starfighter growing up. If you’ve never seen it, here’s the short version: teenager Alex Rogan (Lance Guest) is addicted to a video game – a cabinet video game, not one of them newfangled home consoles – and keeps playing it until he shatters the record. That night, he’s visited by an alien called Centauri (Robert Preston) who tells him that the game is actually a secret test, and Alex has been recruited to join the real StarLeague in its battle against “Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada.” In fact, for a lot of people my age, just SAYING the phrase “Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada” activates something inside of us similar to saying “mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.”

There were lots of movies in this era trying to ride the coattails of Star Wars, and this is one of my favorites. It’s been adapted before – there was a novelization, a Marvel comic book adaptation, and even a stage musical – but despite being pretty well loved by its fan base, there was never a sequel and the story has never continued until now. Original screen writer Jonathan Betuel is working with writers Deric A. Hughes and Benjamin Raab as well as artist Willi Roberts on this new series, which Beutel hints is the beginning of a plan to tell larger stories to expand the universe of the film. And I, for one, couldn’t be happier about it. Honestly, it couldn’t happen to a better franchise.

That said, just because this is the perfect franchise to relaunch as a comic book, that doesn’t mean there aren’t others. Mad Cave has taken the forefront on this in recent years, with reboots of Speed Racer, Dick Tracy, and Defenders of the Earth, as well as individual Defenders characters such as Flash Gordon and the Phantom. And Dynamite Publishing has stepped up to the plate with more “sophisticated” reboots of old cartoons like Thundercats, Silverhawks, Space Ghost, and Captain Planet. It’s not really surprising that writers and artists who grew up on these franchises want to resurrect them in comic book form and put their own spin on them. That said, even with the avalanche of classic stuff we’ve gotten in the last few years, there are still a few that haven’t been touched.

Yet.

So today, in a “Three Wishes” special, I’m going to propose three franchises that – to the best of my knowledge – have never had a sequel or reboot of any kind since their original run ended. And this was harder than it sounds – I thought about nearly a dozen different movies and TV shows that I discarded when I checked and found out that there HAD been a comic book or TV reboot that had escaped my notice. But I’m pretty sure that, for the three I’m about to talk about, any continuation of the original story exists only in the imagination of fans everywhere. Here are three 80s IPs that I would love to see get a reboot or sequel as a comic book. 

Bionic Six

Although Bionic Six had only one season in 1987, this was in the day when a season of a syndicated show ran for 65 episodes, and the reruns could be broadcast for ages. I remember distinctly that our local station showed it fairly early in the morning, and I would watch this cartoon every day when I was getting ready for school, which is probably why I have such fond memories of it. In the “near future,” test pilot Jack Bennett is given super powers through a series experimental of bionic implants and acts as a superhero and secret agent, Bionic-1. But when an avalanche on a family vacation buries his entire family (his wife, son, daughter, and two foster sons) with an object giving off bizarre radiation, the professor who gave him his bionics decides that the only way to save his family is to bionicize the whole batch of ‘em. Professor Sharp becomes the handler/science guy for the team as they fight the supervillain Scarab (who also happens to be Sharp’s brother) and his minions. 

I watched this show faithfully every morning, loved the heroes, loved hating the villains, and I even became a fan of some of the side-characters like the Bandroids (a robot rock band) and pair of villains called Perceptor and Kaleidoscope who did a heel-face turn and joined the good guys. There was a line of action figures in the same scale as the G.I. Joe toys I loved, and even better, the figures had transparent plastic and die-cast metal pieces for the bionics, objectively making them some of the coolest figures of the era. And although it didn’t become as well-known as the likes of Silverhawks or Captain Planet, I think the concept has just as much potential for continuation.

Were I to relaunch the book, here’s what I would do: I would pick up the story several years later. Professor Sharp has passed away, Scarab has long since been defeated, and the Bionic Six are in retirement. Eric (aka Sport-1) has settled into a low-level job, bitter that his dreams of becoming a professional athlete were quashed because he realized he could never compete without the secret of his bionics becoming public. His sister Meg (Rock-1) has found happiness as a music teacher. Their adopted brother Bunji (Karate-1) has retreated to a monastery somewhere, embracing a life of peace and solitude. And J.D. (IQ) has spun his remarkable intelligence into an enormous business empire. Things are mostly okay. 

Until Scarab returns, kidnapping Eric’s daughter, Meg’s son, and J.D.’s twin girls. The siblings reunite, fetching Bunji from his retreat, and head out to rescue the kids. When they arrive, though, they find that Scarab has begun experimenting on them. To save them, J.D. finds himself forced to repeat Professor Sharp’s experiments and bionicize the kids, who never knew that their family was the legendary Bionic Six. After a few near-tragedies caused by their inexperience, Eric and Bunji agree to train them in the use of their powers, with J.D. providing financial backing and support. Although he and Meg decline to return to active duty, they agree to help out if the situation demands it, but now Eric, Bunji, and the four kids are the new Bionic Six. Bunji tries to teach them a more peaceful, spiritual approach, while Eric is desperate to prove himself, causing some nice little interpersonal conflict amidst the family in their new adventures. 

Call me, Mad Cave.

Galaxy High School

The next sci-fi cartoon of the 80s I would give another shot is Galaxy High School. Like Bionic Six, this show only lasted one season. Unlike Bionic Six, though, it was a Saturday morning cartoon, and in its one season it only turned out 13 episodes. I was pretty stunned when I discovered that – I have memories of watching this cartoon that I could have SWORN lasted for YEARS. Reruns are a powerful thing, I guess. Anyway, the show was created by future blockbuster director Chris Columbus (who you may know as the guy who masterfully helmed the methodical torture of Joe Pesci and Daniel stern in Home Alone, among many other films).

In the show, two teenagers from Earth are accepted to the intergalactic “Galaxy High School.” Doyle Cleverlobe is a popular all-star jock, while Aimee Brighttower is an all-star in academics, but shy and unpopular. When they arrive at a school full of aliens, however, the script is flipped: the aliens all adore the brilliant Aimee, while Doyle finds himself immediately rubbing many of them the wrong way and turning into an outcast. The core of the show was the friendship (and teased romance) between the two of them and the adventures they had with their wild cast of alien friends.

If I were to continue this series, I’d pick up right where it left off in Galaxy High School: Sophomore Year. Doyle isn’t quite the outcast he was before, mostly because the others tolerate his presence since he’s friends with Aimee. He’s still eager to prove himself, but he’s a bit less of a dork about it. Aimee, meanwhile, will have a bit of a crisis when a new student rolls into school – a computer intelligence from another planet that’s even smarter than her. 

In addition to continuing the teen romcom with the two of them, I would want to explore the hell out of this universe. The aliens in the show were really wild and creative (Gilda Gossip’s species had several mouths that never stopped talking, Booey Bubblehead had a literal bubble for a head, and the school bully Beef is a giant chicken), but we didn’t see much of their individual cultures in the show’s mere 13 episodes. I would do stories with field trips to other planets, or comics that take place during school breaks and holidays where Aimee and Doyle go with their friends back to their homeworlds for a visit, really getting a chance to explore. Galaxy High School only hinted at a larger, hilarious sci-fi universe that was kind of a kid-friendly version of Douglas Adams. I want to see more of that.

Condorman

The last 80s character I would love to see again comes from the little-known 1981 Disney movie Condorman. Woody Wilkins (Phantom of the Opera star Michael Crawford) is a comic book writer and artist who insists on testing out his fictional hero’s stunts in real life, such as building a Condorman hang glider and trying to fly from the Eiffel Tower. Woody gets caught up in a document exchange with a woman who turns out to be a Soviet spy who falls in love with him and decides to defect to the United States. The movie is kind of half superhero/half James Bond spoof with a lot of awesome gadgets and vehicles that sincerely appealed to the kid I was when I watched it over and over again. To this day, I think about the scene where Woody and Natalia are in what looks like an old truck that, with the flip of a switch, turns into the cool-as-hell Condormobile. It was pretty atypical of Disney, even for the time, but it was fun.

If I was bringing back Condorman, what would I do? Glad you asked, my friend. I’d keep the 80s time frame, because once you hit the 90s spy movies just weren’t what they used to be. I’d reintroduce the characters a year or two after the film, where Woody and Natalia have become a real spy team (mostly due to her doing her best to keep him from getting killed) and send them on another quest, this time to find an American asset who has been captured behind the Iron Curtain. After several adventures, we’d finally rescue the American, only to hit us with the big reveal: the American in question turns out to be Cliff Secord, a pilot in his 60s who once saved the United States wearing the jetpack and helmet of the Rocketeer.

Yeah, that’s right. I would use Condorman as a stealth entryway into a Disney Cinematic Universe. I would also bring in things like Tron, with those characters battling Russian programs. Woody and Natalia would find the remains of the Black Pearl from Pirates of the Caribbean. Tech would be built by Professor Ned Brainard (The Absent-Minded Professor) and Dr. Wayne Szalinski (Honey, I Shrunk the Kids). They would face off against the Sanderson Sisters from Hocus Pocus at Halloween, meet The Santa Clause’s Scott Calvin at Christmas! And I’m not sure when or how, but at some point SOMEBODY would have to Escape to Witch Mountain.

Look, crazier things have happened.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. He may have gotten a little carried away on the Disney Universe thing, but he has no regrets. 

Geek Punditry #133: Summer Movie Triple Feature

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A local swimming pool in my area allows its members to host movie nights during the summer – special events after the sun goes down where you can choose a movie and watch it while you splash around and swat at mosquitos because, let’s be honest, we’re still in Louisiana. But it sounds like a fun time, and recently my brother and sister’s respective families – both of which are members – decided to co-host a movie night. The stipulations were simple: pick a movie rated PG-13 or lower, preferably one that you have on physical media because the streaming capabilities at the pool aren’t exactly state-of-the-art, and Jaws is already taken. Because of course it is. 

Even scary in chlorinated water.

If you’re scheduling an outdoor summer movie, Jaws is probably the most obvious choice there is. It is – as I’m sure you’ve heard me mention before – a virtually flawless movie, and with it being the 50th anniversary this year, interest is at maximum. The story is also a summertime classic – a shark attacks the beaches of Amity Island in the peak of the summer tourism season. After several attacks, including one that ruins the Fourth of July even worse than your cousin who can’t stop talking about politics, the chief of police teams up with an oceanographer and a sailor to hunt down the murderous beast. There’s not a wasted frame in this movie, the music is perfect, and it is absolutely scandalous that Robert Shaw didn’t get a Best Supporting Actor Oscar.

But some other family had already taken it. Since that wasn’t an option, my family started to toss around alternatives. My brother was stuck between Goonies and The Sandlot, both of which are classic films, but they ultimately went with the latter. I get it. As much as I love Goonies, if you’re going for a movie with a summer feel it’s pretty hard to argue against The Sandlot. It’s your timeless coming-of-age story about a new kid in town who finds friends with a ragtag bunch who spends their days playing baseball in a local…well…sandlot. Again, it’s a movie that’s perfectly in keeping with the theme and gives you a summertime feel like few other movies can accomplish. Perfect – they texted the pool’s organizer to tell him they’d settled on their movie and my sister jumped on Oriental Trading and started ordering baseball-themed decorations for the event.

I think one of these kids grew up to be the ambassador to Uganda or something.

Right after she got her shipping notification, the organizer texted back to tell them that some other family had already chosen The Sandlot for THEIR movie night.

And so it was back to the drawing board. Goonies was briefly reconsidered, then someone suggested doing a “Christmas in July” theme and showing National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation or Home Alone, both of which I thought would be a really fun idea. Christmas Vacation was ultimately vetoed due to that one moment of profanity Chevy Chase drops during his legendary meltdown scene at the end of the film, which I can respect. There are gonna be a lot of kids in the pool, after all, and you don’t want to have to cover their ears lest you be forced to explain who Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye were. Other ideas rattled around until finally, they decided to go with a recent hit that was freshly available on Blu-Ray: The Minecraft Movie.

I’ve never played Minecraft myself, nor have I seen the movie. I don’t really know anything about it, other than it apparently has something to do with a chicken wearing jockeys, but it made a ton of money and I’m sure it’s going to be a big success with the families at the pool. But is it really a summer movie? 

As so often happens when I think about stuff like this, I started to compile a list. If I was scheduling an outdoor summer movie film festival, what are some of the movies I would program? What are movies that both capture the feel of summertime in various ways AND are family-friendly enough that I could put them on a big screen in the out of doors and not have to answer uncomfortable questions from pearl-clutching parents? (Obviously, the other Vacation movies are automatically disqualified.) So here is how I’d program a summer film triple feature that’s fun for everyone. I want three movies that encapsulate three of the most iconic summertime activities: a road trip, summer camp, and going to the beach. Each activity gets one film. 

First up, for the earliest movie you need something for the kids that’s also fun for the adults. When I hear someone dismiss a terrible movie because “it’s just for kids,” that feels like a slap in the face to the likes of Up, Wall-E, Puss in Boots: The Last Wish, or hundreds of other great movies that are aimed at children but still have the kind of depth and heart that endears grown-ups to them. If you think it’s okay to make an awful movie just because you think only kids are going to watch it, I’m telling you right now, you’ve got to do better. 

The greatest comedic mind of his era in his first feature-length movie!

So I’m going to kick it off with a road trip movie that kids and parents alike love: A Goofy Movie from 1995. Goofy’s son Max is out of school for the summer, and Goofy decides to take his son on the ultimate fishing trip. But unbeknownst to him, Max has bragged to a girl he’s got a crush on that he’s going to a rock concert, and he has to devise a way to get his dad to change his plans. 

This is one of those movies that you can watch as a kid and enjoy it on one level, then as an adult, get an entirely different message. As a kid, this is the story of Max trying to have the greatest summer of his life and win the girl of his dreams. You get that. You understand it. And you absolutely understand how his father – literally Goofy – can be somewhat embarrassing for an adolescent, especially when genetics seem to have determined that you’re doomed to follow in his footsteps and become a Goof in your own right. 

As an adult, you see this movie as the story of a father whose son is on the verge of growing up and who is desperately attempting to forge memories together before it’s too late. As an adult, you know that the stuff that Max is worried about is teenage stuff, stuff that quickly loses its relevance when you’re out of high school, but Goofy’s desires are all about a life long bond that he’s afraid of losing, something that hits the gut of any parent. 

Plus, the music slaps.

It’s not part of the “Disney Animated Canon,” as it wasn’t produced by the Walt Disney Animation Studios arm of the many-tentacled monster that is Disney, but I think it rates up there with Beauty and the Beast, The Lion King, and Aladdin as one of the finest, most heartfelt films of the Disney Renaissance era. And it’s funnier than any of them. 

For the second film in my summer film fest, I’m going to step back a decade from the adventures of the Goof clan and bring in the late, great Jim Varney in Ernest Goes to Camp. Here’s a movie that’s maybe a bit more for the adults who grew up with Ernest, but the kids will love it too. Summer amp is such a traditional activity that it absolutely HAS to be included in our triple feature. And since we’re going for a family-friendly festival, we have to automatically disqualify any summer camp movie which features counselors being brutally murdered. Which is about 95 percent of them.

I mentioned how Ernest is totally worth of holding Mjolnir, right?

But that’s cool! Because Ernest Goes to Camp is actually better than any of those. American Hero Jim Varney plays the kindhearted (but dimwitted) Ernest P. Worrel, handyman at Kamp Kikakee, who has aspirations of one day becoming a camp counselor. He gets a shot at his dream when a group of boys from a reform school are sent to him as part of the camp’s “Second Chance” program and Ernest is put in charge. The kids turn out to be rougher than Ernest expected, and things get even worse when he’s conned into getting the owner of the camp to sign the land over to a developer. 

From there, as always, it’s Ernest to the rescue.

Jim Varney’s Ernest is one of those things that I’ve never hidden my love for, and it actually feels great to see how kindly he’s regarded now. There was a heart and a warmth to the Ernest movies, a sincerity to them, a…dare I pun? An earnestness to the character that few others have matched. Ernest is the kind of hero who succeeds because he’s too simple to understand that victory is impossible. Honestly, I think if more of us had that kind of simplicity in our hearts, the world would be a better place. 

Then comes movie #3. Now for the third chapter of a triple feature, you’re allowed to be a little less kid-friendly, since a lot of the parents with littles will have taken them home by now, leaving mostly grown-ups and older kids left in the audience. I’m going to close things off, then with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore in 50 First Dates. Sandler has made some stinkers, I won’t lie, but I’ve always enjoyed the sweetness of this movie. 

If nothing else, you’ve got to respect this movie for not being Little Nicky.

Set in Hawaii, so there’s a constant beach backdrop, Sandler plays Henry Roth, an employee at a Sea World-style park who meets and immediately falls in love with an art teacher named Lucy. After an amazing first date, he tries to see her again, only to learn that she has no idea who she is. Lucy, it seems, suffered brain damage in a car accident and has lost the ability to make long-term memories – every day she wakes up and has forgotten everything that has happened since the day of the accident. If Henry wants to be with the girl of his dreams, he has to make her fall in love with him all over again. Every. Single. Day.

Sandler’s movies, especially from this era, could often rely on gross-out or prurient humor that doesn’t work for me. And to be fair, there’s a little of that in 50 First Dates. But there’s also a heart to this film that a lot of Sandler’s movies don’t have. A lot of guys in Henry’s situation would bail out, but the notion that he cares enough about Lucy to go through with starting over day after day after day is pretty wholesome and encouraging. 

There you have it, friends – a summertime triple feature that I think would make for a fine night out at the movies. Go ahead and inflate your portable screens, fire up the grill, and set up the lawn chairs. You can have this one for free.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. He’ll be back with a perfect Halloween campfire triple feature in October if he remembers, which he almost certainly won’t. 

Geek Punditry #125: Summer of Seratonin

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This column is NOT going to be about Superman, although I’m going to mention him briefly here in the beginning.

If you follow this blog all week and not just on Fridays when I throw Geek Punditry at you, you’ve probably noticed my Year of Superman posts on Wednesdays. I started the Year of Superman because December was rough and I thought immersing myself in Superman would make 2025 a great year. And I’m enjoying the hell out of having a taste of Superman every day. But aside from that, 2025 has kind of been an asshole, and I’m starting to take it personally. But now it’s May, and by the time you read this my semester will be over and I’ll be off for the summer. So the question is, can I find enough stuff – in addition to the new Superman Unlimited comic, Mark Waid taking over Action Comics, new series for Supergirl and Krypto, a miniseries all about different shades of Kryptonite, and (oh yeah) the new Superman movie – to have summer start to make up for a craptacular first half of the year? 

This legit might not be enough.

Because the truth is, Superman isn’t the ONLY thing I’m excited for. In fact, there are several things coming out this summer that I’m very excited about and I can’t wait to read, watch, and otherwise explore. So today I’m going to talk about some of the things I’m MOST excited for, things that I hope will perk me up even more, and bring the year around. 

Vin Diesel is still pissed they didn’t cast him for this one on general principle.

Superman is my favorite superhero (that’s probably the last time I’ll mention him), but most people who know me know that my #2 is Benjamin J. Grimm, the ever-lovin’ blue-eyed Thing, and I am very excited to see him hit the screen in a couple of months. But for all the comic book greatness, there hasn’t really been a Fantastic Four MOVIE that has worked. There was a movie in the 90s made only to retain the movie rights with no intention of ever seeing wide release, and ironically, despite its shoestring budget it had some earnestness to it…but it looked like it was made on a shoestring. In the 00s, we got a pair of movies that were…okay. And in 2015 there was a movie that should never again be mentioned in polite society. After four previous tries, director Matt Shakman’s Fantastic Four: First Steps finally looks like a movie that’s going to give us an FF that delivers. 

There have been two trailers so far (well, a teaser and a full trailer), trailers that have shown us a Fantastic Four in a very 60s sci-fi pop environment, something that’s absolutely perfect for these characters. The thing to remember about the Fantastic Four is that – although they are technically superheroes – the flavor is less like the Justice League and more similar to the classic sci-fi heroes like Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers. The Fantastic Four are explorers, inventors, and innovators before anything else, and the previous iterations have never quite captured that. In this movie, we’ve got costumes that actually look like space suits. Characters who are clearly known and beloved around the world. And as this is, in fact, part of the MCU’s “Multiverse Saga,” these are the characters who fit that concept the most.

This is a picture that says “suit us up, we’re going to space.”

I know a lot of fans who keep trying to turn the FF Vs. Superman (okay I lied) into some sort of competition – they both come out in July, so who’s movie is going to do better? What an incredibly short-sighted notion. It drives me crazy when people insist on taking sides. You can love two things, IT’S ALLOWED, and I’ve got no doubt that Clark would be in the front row when First Steps premieres on July 15, just two weeks after his movie comes out.

But I don’t get to the movie theaters that often these days – if I actually make it twice in July, it will be a record in a post-Eddie world. So I’m going to be turning to the television for some of this entertainment serotonin as well, and thank goodness, there are two shows returning to the airwaves this ye– wait, they’re on streaming services, not over the air. It doesn’t matter, the principle applies anyway. First up, coming to Disney+ in a few weeks, is a revival of the classic animated series Phineas and Ferb. The original series, which ended nearly ten years ago, was one of the funniest cartoons of the century so far, and like all brilliant ideas, it’s remarkably simple. Two step-brothers spend their summer vacation building absurdly improbable contraptions and inventions as their sister desperately tries and fails to get their mother to catch them in the act while, simultaneously, their pet platypus who is really a secret agent has to stop a mad scientist in his constant efforts to take over the Tri-State area. What could be simpler?

Legally, summer belongs to these guys, but I’m pretty sure they’ll let me borrow it if I ask nicely and promise to fill up the tank before I give it back.

In all honesty, though, the original series was delightful, charming, and unfailingly funny. When Disney announced they were bringing it back, I was unashamedly thrilled. The same creators are back, along with most of the original cast, and they’re picking it back up again the next summer. More adventures, more music, more -inators, and there’s even a preview available of the first few minutes right now. If watching these few minutes of greatness doesn’t get you excited for the return, then you clearly just hate joy. June 5 is the target date for this one.

My one question – my ONLY question – is about the Danville school system. 104 days of summer vacation? ONE HUNDRED AND FOUR? I’ve never even made it to SEVENTY. 

The other show I’m super psyched for this week is the return of Star Trek: Strange New Worlds with a two-episode drop on July 17. While the modern versions of Trek have been hit or miss for a lot of fans, Strange New Worlds is perhaps the most universally acclaimed of the series. Set aboard the original Enterprise in the years before James T. Kirk became the captain, Strange New Worlds has the most classically “Trek” feeling of any of the other live-action shows of the modern era, living up to its name with exploration of planets and civilizations we’ve never seen before. It also is far more successful than some of these other versions at attacking the sort of high-minded sci-fi concepts the original brought in without being too heavy-handed or on-the-nose like certain others I could mention.

Thank God, a Star Trek that remembers what “allegory” means again.

The wait for a new season of Strange New Worlds hasn’t been as long as the wait for Phineas and Ferb – a mere two years instead of ten – but Strange New Worlds’s last season ended on a cliffhanger. The wait was exacerbated by the Hollywood writers and actors going on strike in 2023, and now we’re finally going to find out what happened after Captain Pike and the crew of the Enterprise…

…uh…

…crap, it’s been two years, guys. I guess I really need to watch the last season again.

But you know, that’s okay. Summer is just starting, and I’ll need stuff to make it worthwhile. So I’ll re-watch the first two seasons of Strange New Worlds. And I’ll watch classic Phineas and Ferb. And I’ll read more Fantastic Four and Superman comics (hell with it). Because these are the things that make me happy, and when the world does whatever it can to make the summer seem long, hot, and unbearable, these are the things I’ll be turning to, making it a little bit better.

Oh, and also the love of family and friends and all that stuff.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. If you’ve got more summer greatness that you’re looking forward to, let him know. He’s actually quite concerned that the stuff he’s listed isn’t going to be enough to fill the tank. 

Geek Punditry #116: The Looney, Looney, Looney Bugs Bunny Crisis

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It’s critically acclaimed! It’s the #1 family movie at the box-office! The preorder is currently the top-selling comedy Blu-Ray on Amazon! And yet somehow, there’s a pretty good chance you didn’t even know it exists! I’m talking about the new cinematic masterpiece The Day the Earth Blew Up: A Looney Tunes Movie!

Well, I can’t necessarily guarantee “masterpiece” – I haven’t had a chance to see the movie yet, but I am terribly excited for it. My excitement, in fact, is matched almost by how baffled I am at how badly Warner Bros is mishandling the Looney Tunes franchise at the moment. The Day the Earth Blew Up is the first ever feature-length fully-animated theatrical Looney Tunes movie – every other time they’ve been on the big screen in anything other than a short, it’s been with human guest-stars. This time around, though, it’s all toon all the time. The stars of this movie, Daffy Duck and Porky Pig (both voiced by Eric Bauza), haphazardly uncover an alien mind control plot. With the fate of the world at stake, these two most unlikely heroes are the only hope we have – assuming they don’t drive each other crazy first. 

They may not be Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum, but I believe they can get the job done.

Since the movie made some festival appearances last year, the buzz has been fantastic. Critics are very high on this movie, with more than one even going so far as to call it the best comedy of the year. And yet somehow Warner Bros, the studio that made it, the studio that has been making Looney Tunes cartoons since the dawn of animation…decided NOT TO RELEASE IT. Instead, it wound up getting shopped around to other distributors and was finally picked up by a lesser-known company called Ketchup Entertainment, which in the past has mostly been known as a distribution hub for smaller, independent movies. In fact, until now, the highest-profile film they had ever released was last year’s flop Hellboy: The Crooked Man. 

Now, not only is Ketchup reaping the benefits of The Day the Earth Blew Up, but word has it that they may be able to resurrect another seemingly-dead Looney Tunes movie, Coyote Vs. Acme –  a courtroom comedy about Wile E. Coyote suing the Acme corporation over all their flawed products that have tormented him for decades. In addition to Wile E. himself, the movie stars John Cena and Will Forte and is completely finished, and once again, those who have seen it have been very very positive. But in 2023, Warner Bros shelved it as part of the same tax write-off scheme that killed the almost-finished Batgirl movie, and it was feared that it would never see the light of day. 

This isn’t what I expected when I heard there was a new John Grisham movie.

Then, this very week that The Day the Earth Blew Up hit theaters, another bit of shocking news: Warner Bros’ streaming service, MAX, has quietly removed ALL Looney Tunes content. The classic shorts, the movies, the spin-off cartoon series…it’s all gone.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON AT WARNER BROS?

I mean, I think that’s a fair question at this point. The Looney Tunes should be the crown jewel in their portfolio. It should be one of the most important things they push and promote. There is literally no property on Earth more closely associated with the Warner Bros brand than the Looney Tunes. Oh sure, there are other big IPs in their library – DC Comics, Harry Potter, and The Wizard of Oz all come to mind. But not a single one of those was originally a WB creation. They got DC Comics when they bought another company that owned it, they license Harry Potter, and Oz was one of the many acquisitions they bought from the floundering MGM Studios when it was going under. When it comes to characters and series that were created and crafted there, in the Warner Bros offices, by Warner Bros employees, there is nothing else as well-known as the Looney Tunes. There’s not even anything close. 

You don’t see Steven Universe just chilling with the logo, do you?

I don’t usually like to play the comparison game, but in this case I think I have to. Look at the difference between the way Warner Bros treats the Looney Tunes and the way Disney treats its classic characters, especially those who were around in the golden age as short film stars: Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Goofy, and Pluto, primarily. Every one of those characters is still around, still iconic. You can get them on t-shirts, you can buy their toys, they appear in new cartoons and childrens’ books, and they have for years.

Now try to find some merchandise with Bugs, Daffy, Porky, or the Road Runner. It’s not impossible, but it’s not nearly as easy, either.

Over the decades, Disney has worked hard to make sure their classic characters remain in the public eye. Warner Bros has not. And I think part of the problem is the way that animation in general is still often thought of as children’s entertainment. The original Looney Tunes cartoons are the greatest cartoons of the 40s and 50s, and by a large margin. Even the funniest Disney shorts – and here I am thinking specifically of things like the Goofy “How to” cartoons or the ones where he teaches us how to play a sport – are no match for the likes of Rabbit Seasoning, Rabbit of Seville, One Froggy Evening, or Feed the Kitty. Hell, Chuck Jones’s Duck Amuck should be put in a museum and studied in school as an absolute masterpiece of surrealist comedy, something that has been unmatched before or since. 

This belongs in a museum! Right next to the Mona Lisa! And that chick with no arms!

Part of the reason those cartoons were so great is because they were being made for a mass audience, NOT specifically for children. When you paid your nickel to go to the movies in 1939, you would also see a newsreel, a chapter of a serial, short films, and cartoons – and if you were lucky, they were Looney Tunes cartoons. The likes of Friz Freling, Tex Avery, Bob Clampett, and Chuck Jones were making cartoons that THEY thought were funny…and everybody else agreed. 

But that DOES mean that the audience for the Looney Tunes skews a bit older than the Disney audience. Stuff like Mickey Mouse Clubhouse gave the classic Disney characters a preschool audience that grew up with them, but efforts like Baby Looney Tunes just…aren’t as good. 

“Meeska, Mooska, your move, Warner Bros!”

To give Warner Bros at least a LITTLE bit of credit, they do seem to recognize this part of the problem. The Looney Tunes audience is older, so a lot of the merchandise they make is for an older fan. On my shelf of Superman stuff, for instance, I’ve got the McFarlane Toys Bugs Bunny-as-Superman action figure that came out a year or two ago. It’s a gorgeous figure, because McFarlane makes gorgeous figures…but these figures are “collectibles.” They’re almost statues. They’re not really TOYS, not something for kids to play with. There’s nothing wrong with that, but…where ARE the toys for kids? Or the books? Or the clothes? It’s fine to cater to the existing audience, but to make no effort to create a NEW audience is insane, and that’s exactly what Warner Bros is doing. 

Nobody is allowed on this shelf until they earn the “S.”

This is not to suggest that Looney Tunes is the only problem Warner Bros has. For several years now they’ve been in absolute crisis mode, not seeming to know what to do with any of their major properties. The struggles with DC have become the stuff of legend, although I – and many of us – have strong hopes that James Gunn and Peter Safran have finally found the key to righting that particular ship. In their efforts to “modernize” Scooby-Doo, WB canned a sequel to the charming Scoob! movie (another tax victim) while giving a greenlight to the odious Velma series. A few years back, they even hastily turned out the direct-to-DVD movie Tom and Jerry: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, an ill-conceived effort to maintain their license to the property that was so poorly received the Roald Dahl estate shifted future Dahl properties to Netflix. 

With the Looney Tunes cartoons removed from MAX, it seemed like the only place to find them in the wild would be on MeTV and MeTV Toons. But a few days ago came another announcement – Tubi (which is rapidly proving itself to be the best free streaming service out there) is picking up at least a FEW Looney Tunes properties. They are the new home for The Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries – a decent series from the 90s that’s all about the titular duo and Granny travelling the world solving crimes – as well as the excellent Looney Toons Show from 2011. If you’ve never heard of that last one, that’s the one to watch. It was a Cartoon Network series that was a sort of a mashup between the classic Looney Tunes sensibilities and those of a standard American sitcom. The premise is that Daffy Duck has to move in with Bugs Bunny, Odd Couple style, and they get into hijinks. It’s not AS wild as the old shorts were, but the show still finds ways to careen between plots like Daffy trying to make himself look good for his high school reunion to such unlikely things as a discarded soda can making the two of them fugitives from the law, racing across state lines and painting themselves yellow in an effort to avoid the police. It’s good stuff.

Bugs is a Felix. Daffy, oddly, a Samantha.

But what about the classics? The original theatrical shorts from the 40s and 50s? Well, good news – Warner Bros has a new line of Blu-Ray releases coming out soon that will collect the best of those! And you can purchase them with your own American dollars!

Of course, this has left some people angry, with the suspicion that the only reason they pulled the cartoons from MAX is to get people to buy the Blu-Rays and, understandably, they are reluctant to do so. But I’ve got to recommend a different approach. I know you don’t want to do what it seems like Warner Bros WANTS us to do, but if you really care about the future of the Looney Tunes like I do, the only way to show that it to support it. That means watching the cartoons on Tubi, being vocal about the reruns on MeTV, going out to see The Day the Earth Blew Up while it’s still in theaters, and – yes – even getting these new Blu-Rays. I’m not saying you should purchase something you don’t want, but I AM saying that if the only reason you’re refusing to buy them is to spite Warner Bros, that’s not a good reason. And let’s be fair – Warner Bros is far from the only company that has demonstrated very clearly to us that it’s best to keep buying the physical media of the things that you love. 

The Looney Tunes are legends, and all of this is to say that if you can’t figure out a way to make money with the Looney Tunes, the single greatest property ever created by the Warner Bros Studios, maybe you shouldn’t be in charge of Warner Bros Studios. 

“Well Blake, if you’re so smart, why aren’t YOU in charge?” Somebody always asks that sort of stupid question, so let me address it. I, sir, am not the one being paid hundreds of millions of dollars to steer this studio. I am not an executive, I do not have an executive mindset. But I’m not the one who is claiming that I do. On the other hand, I bet I can at least come up with SOMETHING to promote the brand that’s better than anything Warner Bros is doing to get the Looney Tunes back out there.

Give me five seconds.

Okay, I’ve got it. 

It’s simple, and it’s relatively inexpensive, but it would open up the Looney Tunes to a potentially gargantuan audience that is going completely untapped right now. And as much as I hate to say it, I have to ask this question.

WHY THE HELL AREN’T THE LOONEY TUNES ON TIKTOK?

There are approximately 1.5 BILLION people using TikTok every month. That’s not a joke. I checked. And a hell of a lot of them fall into that young demographic that Warner Bros so desperately needs. Since I’ve started putting my own reels there, I’ve found feeds for dozens of current TV shows using the platform to bolster an audience. I’ve also found feeds of classic TV shows that show short clips. And even as we speak, a full 217 people have signed up to watch my goofy ass, and at least twelve of them are NOT my wife. How hard would it be to grab 30-second segments from the legendary Looney Tunes shorts and drop them on the platform? An INTERN could do this job. Follow it up with a trailer for The Day the Earth Blew Up. Put a link to the damn Blu-Rays in the TikTok shop. This is an audience that is being allowed to lay fallow, and they’re all RIGHT THERE, mindlessly scrolling. They might as well be scrolling to something that will enrich their culture and expose them to true art, like Duck Dodgers in the 24th ½ Century. 

You can’t tell me some woman in her car screaming about her neighbors is more deserving of a platform than THIS.

There, Warner Bros. You can have that one for free. But you are sitting on the greatest library of comedic characters in the history of western civilization, and you’re letting them wither on the vine. Even worse, WHEN you create good content, you BURY it. It’s absolutely insane. On behalf of all of us out here who love Bugs and Daffy, Porky and Speedy, Marvin the Martian, Foghorn Leghorn, and all the other giants of the comedic art, I say this from the bottom of our collective hearts:

Get your shit together. 

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. And while we’re at it, stop screwing around with the Flintstones, too.

Geek Punditry #95: A Not-So-Scary Punditry

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“You know Blake,” some of you may be saying, “Just because it’s October doesn’t mean that EVERYTHING you write about has to be scary. Some of us don’t necessarily NEED to immerse ourselves in serial killers and cosmic horror and Stephen King 24/7.”

“You’re right,” I said.

“I…I am?” you reply.

“Yeah, you are. I guess just because it’s October doesn’t mean EVERYTHING has to be scary.”

“Oh. Oookay. Well…GOOD!”

“So this week,” I say, “I’ll talk about some stuff that isn’t scary at all.”

“Thank you.”

“Still gonna write about Halloween, though.”

“Damn it.”

We all know how much I love the creepy content during Spooky Season, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t other things about Halloween that I love just as much – things that wouldn’t scare anybody but, at the same time, still contribute to the ghoulishly gleeful fun of this month. So if you’re NOT the kind of person who wants to be freaked out for Halloween but you still want to take part in the celebration, I’m going to give you guys a few recommendations for totally safe, family-friendly Halloween entertainment that will hopefully take you through to next month.

Fun stuff like a severed head pie!

When I’m not watching somebody getting disemboweled in October, you know what’s the next best thing? Baking. I’ve been a fan for YEARS of the Food Network’s “Baking Championship” shows, and Halloween is the prime time. There are a whopping 14 seasons of Halloween Baking Championship available, and they’re all worth watching. In case you need someone to spell it out for you, it’s a pretty standard reality competition show. Each season a new group of contestants are gathered together and made to compete in a series of baking challenges, each episode one contestant is eliminated, and in the end, a victor is crowned. There are a wide variety of challenges as well – sometimes they have to make a certain type of dessert, sometimes they have to decorate their concoction based on a specific theme, sometimes there’s a specific ingredient they have to use. This is all well and good, but as I can’t actually eat any of the things that they’re making at home, I generally tune in to see what these creations look like. I’m in awe of some of these cakes and pies and cobblers that come out looking like monsters, skeletons, witch’s cauldrons, spellbooks, and any other sort of thing you can imagine.

Now, this isn’t one of those shows where they’re necessarily attempting to IMITATE real things (you’re thinking of Is It Cake?, where the goal is to make a cake that can trick someone into thinking it’s something else, like a shoe). This is purely about the artistry and creativity of the decorating and how good the food actually tastes. I don’t talk about it much, but I actually quite enjoy baking. It’s a fun, soothing, and edible hobby, and I think I can do a decent job making things that taste pretty good. However, absolutely NOTHING I have ever or will ever make in my entire life will look as amazing as the stuff we see on this show. Even the LOSERS turn out confections that put anything I could ever create to shame, and somehow I enjoy watching that.

If you think that sign is gonna stop me from eating your house, Mr. Snake, you are sadly mistaken.

I also like these shows way more than “traditional” reality competitions like Survivor or Big Brother because — unlike those other shows — you don’t have the pettiness, the nastiness, or the backstabbing that have made them world-famous. In fact, it’s not at all unusual to see the contestants on these shows HELP each other if they can. It’s not QUITE as cozy as The Great British Baking Show, but there’s still a vibe of camaraderie that makes this show far more entertaining than one where they’re voting each other off.

It’s not the only show that has this pedigree as well. There are two other Food Network shows with similar formats that I also enjoy. Outrageous Pumpkins is structurally the same, except instead of baking it’s about carving and building elaborate displays out of pumpkins. Then there’s Halloween Wars, which combines the two: on this show there are teams of food artists (typically a baker, a pumpkin carver, and someone skilled in making things out of sugar) working together to create remarkably elaborate dioramas that look like they could have spilled out of a haunted house. 

Maybe that’s not your thing, though. You want something with a story, a plot. I’ve got just the thing, guys, and it’s called Bob’s Burgers. This has been one of my favorite cartoon series for years. At its core, it’s an animated sitcom about the owner of a struggling hamburger joint and his lunatic family, including his wife Linda and their three kids. The thing about this show, though, is that no matter how strange, bizarre, or absolutely ludicrous that week’s misadventure may get, there is a warm and loving core. Bob and Linda Belcher love each other and love their children completely and without reservation. That doesn’t mean they never get mad or have conflict, because real love doesn’t work that way, but at the end of the day they deeply care about one another, and that’s really refreshing in an era where so many TV comedies are about families who can’t even be in the same room together without being jerks. 

Bob gives you a Halloween episode with FULL bars of chocolate.

The Belchers are in their FIFTEENTH season, and they’ve actually done more for holiday episodes than almost any other show I’ve ever seen. Over a dozen of their fifteen seasons have included Halloween episodes. Not only that, but they almost always have a Thanksgiving episode AND a Christmas episode each year. Plus, while not exactly an annual occurrence like the others, there have been several Valentine’s Day episodes as well. The people behind this show LOVE their holidays. If you’ve got the Hulu streaming service, there’s a spot in their “Huluween” library where you can actually access every Halloween episode of Bob’s Burgers right now. Just try to ignore the fact that 13 Halloweens have gone by and Louise Belcher is still eight years old. It’s a cartoon, you know how this works. 

Last year, I spent an entire column writing about some of the great Halloween specials and how much I want new ones. I’m not going to go through all of them again (go ahead and read last year’s column), but let’s remember how many awesome non-scary Halloween specials actually exist. Beyond the classics like It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown and Garfield’s Halloween Adventure, there are lesser-known but still worthy movies and specials like Rankin and Bass’s Mad Monster Party, Halloween is Grinch Night, or The Legend of Sleepy Hollow. 

But what about the SHORTS, guys?

I’m still waiting for a scientific explanation for how Louie kept that pumpkin on his head.

I have often felt like a man out of time in many respects, and none more so than my craving for theatrical animated shorts. There was a time, a halcyon era before I was born, when buying a movie ticket would include not just the feature film, but at least one short film. It’s the place where the Looney Tunes, Tom and Jerry, and the Disney pantheon all came from, and the fact that not even Pixar is still consistently giving us theatrical cartoon shorts makes me a sad, sad panda. But back in the day, these studios gave us some magnificent Halloween shorts that are still fun to watch today. Let’s talk about two of my favorites, both of which star the same phenomenal voice actor, the immortal June Foray. 

In 1952, Jack Hannah gave us Disney’s Trick or Treat, which is in the running for my favorite Donald Duck cartoon of all time. I know you’ve seen this one: Donald pranks his nephews while they’re trick-or-treating by dumping water on their heads, because Donald is just that kind of a jerk sometimes. This transgression is witnessed by Witch Hazel – voiced by Foray – and she decides to give Donald his comeuppance. She comes after Donald with the help of the boys, some singing ghosts, and a magic spray that gives her control over his legs. 

The same thing happened to me when I tried the “Wednesday Whopper” at Burger King.

It’s a funny cartoon with gorgeous animation and, along with it, a song that should by God be a national Halloween anthem. I’m not even joking – if a kid came up to my house singing the “Trick or Treat” song from this cartoon I would just dump all of my candy into their bag and close the door, because they just won Halloween. Plus there’s June Foray as Witch Hazel, the only person in the history of American cinema who even comes close to Mel Blanc as a voice master. Some people have even called her the “female Mel Blanc,” while others find it more appropriate to refer to Blanc as “the male June Foray.” I’m not going to argue with either one of them.

But it didn’t end there. Four years later, in 1956, director Chuck Jones asked Foray to reprise her role as Witch Hazel – not in a Disney short, but for the Looney Tunes. You see, Jones noticed that “witch hazel” is the name of an actual plant and, therefore, Disney could not trademark the name, making it free for him to use as well. Armed with the law on his side, he recruited Foray into his acting troupe for the cartoon Broom-Stick Bunny.

Marvel likes to act like they invented things, but June Foray has been doing Multiversal Variants since the 1950s.

In this one, Bugs Bunny is wearing a witch costume for his trick-or-treating and winds up in the mansion of, once again, Witch Hazel, who thinks he IS a fellow witch and invites him in. It’s a great cartoon and knowing that Jones deliberately cast Foray to voice the character in an attempt to “remake” the Disney version makes it even funnier. Foray, for her part, did attempt to differentiate the two witches, using an American accent for the Warner Bros version instead of the British accent she gave the Disney witch, but it’s hard to watch the two cartoons back-to-back without picturing them as the same character. Foray would reprise the Witch Hazel role several times and ultimately became a frequent collaborator of Chuck Jones. The voice of Cindy Lou Who from How the Grinch Stole Christmas may have been totally different if Jones didn’t want to poke at the Disney machine just a little bit.

Actual photograph of Disney’s reaction upon learning of the Chuck Jones cartoon (1956, colorized).

If you want to join in on the fun of Halloween but you don’t want to be scared, there are still plenty of options out there for you. Round up the kids, watch some of these classic cartoons, try to recreate some of the eerie edibles from the Food Network shows, and just have fun with it. Halloween should be fun, and if your idea of fun doesn’t involve having your blood chilled, there’s nothing wrong with that. You’ve just got to find what unlocks your inner ghoul with lighter fare. 

QUICK NOTE: If you’re the type of person who actually reads the title of these columns (hi!) then you may notice that this issue the 95th installment of Geek Punditry. Coming up on the two-year anniversary and, perhaps more important, the nice, round 100th column. I’m the kind of nerd who likes nice, round numbers, and I want to do something special for the big 1-0-0…trouble is, I don’t know WHAT to do. So if you have a suggestion for something you think I should write about or something I’ve discussed in the past you’d like me to go back to, here’s your chance to let me know I’m open for suggestions! You can drop them in the comments here, on whatever social media you followed to get to this post, or email me at info@blakempetit.com!

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s still not sure what he’s going to dress up as for Halloween this year. He was considering a Stephen King costume, but he hasn’t been able to find a Maine travel guide. 

Geek Punditry #75: The Pixar Moment

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It isn’t that long ago that Pixar was perhaps the single most reliable name in family entertainment. One movie after another was not only a box office smash, but the recipient of nearly universal critical acclaim. The Toy Story films, The Incredibles, Wall-E, Up…there hasn’t been a track record of animated success like this one since the Disney Renaissance days. But over the last few years, these fortunes faltered and the one-time juggernaut has become almost a bit player in the House of Mouse. With Inside Out 2 coming out next week, the sequel to one of Pixar’s last truly great movies, there’s a chance to course correct. I have no idea if they’ll pull it off, but this seems like a good time to look back at the Golden age of Pixar in the hopes that they can find it again.

“Okay, guys, he’s talking about us, everybody line u– oh for…WHO LET THE DINOSAUR IN HERE?”

The best Pixar movies have always been allegories, presenting universal experiences in a way that kids can understand. The Toy Story movies, for instance, form a magnificent triptych about growing up using a cowboy toy as a surrogate for the audience. In the first movie, Cowboy Woody (Tom Hanks) is upset when his owner Andy gets a new, flashy Buzz Lightyear action figure (Tim Allen). Woody is forced to confront the fact that he’s no longer the center of Andy’s universe, a lesson that every child has to learn at some point or another. In Toy Story 2 Woody is shown evidence of his former glory, and ultimately must choose between chasing this sort of false promise of fame and the family he has worked so hard to cultivate. It may not be as universal a situation as the original, but it’s still a good message. The third is an outright masterpiece: Andy is all grown up and about to leave for college, and our old friends are mistakenly tossed into a donation bin. The movie is a beautiful story about growing up and letting go, but done in a way that doesn’t make it frightening for children, not to mention remarkably powerful for the grown-ups who went through it all with Andy in real time.

It’s rare that the third movie in a series is the best one. Pretty much just this and Police Academy, I guess.

Which is why Toy Story 4 was such a damned disappointment. After a crystalline metaphor for childhood, the fourth film loses all of that, having Woody abandon the rest of the toys largely because Bonnie – the child Andy bequeathed him to – doesn’t love him the way Andy did. There’s no true core here, nothing to connect the movie to that extended storyline about life that the first three made up. One could argue that it’s about letting go, except that part 3 already used that as its message, and was infinitely more effective.

Up is perhaps my favorite Pixar film. After the tragic loss of his wife, Carl Fredricksen (Ed Asner) becomes a recluse, holing up in the house he shared with her and refusing to budge. When told he has no choice but to vacate his home by a land developer, he instead hooks up the house to a buttload of helium balloons and takes it with him. The premise is ludicrous, but the movie is sublime: a fable that is ultimately about the need to move forward after a loss. It is a reminder that we will all experience tragedy in our times, but we can’t allow that to stop us from living our lives. Lots of Pixar movies can make you cry at the end. Up is the only movie I’ve ever seen that moves me to tears in the FIRST ten minutes. 

The reason behind it may be tragic, but haven’t we all wished we could do this at some point or another?

If Up is my favorite Pixar movie, then Wall-E is a very close second. A pure science fiction film, the movie is set in a future in which the Earth became so uninhabitable that humanity was forced to flee into outer space. Over the centuries, one little robot who was tasked with cleaning up the garbage left behind has kept up with his assigned task, even though it seems an exercise in futility until a probe droid from one of the human ships returns to Earth to seek signs of life. Then the remarkable happens: Wall-E falls in love.

A better love story than Twilight, and it’s not even close.

The movie is unbearably sweet, but never in a sickening or saccharine way. When you watch the interaction between Wall-E and EVE (the robot from the human ship Axiom) there is never even a second when you doubt the utter sincerity of emotion put on display. Wall-E is in love. EVE falls in love with him as well. With all the debate surrounding AI at the moment, I find it pretty incredible that 16 years ago Pixar showed us an AI with an actual soul, which is what all of the AI “art” and “writing” being churned out by the likes of ChatGPT completely lacks. Pixar made us believe in Wall-E by making him – a tiny robot with almost no dialogue and a design that (let’s be honest here) was totally ripped off of Johnny 5 from the Short Circuit movies – into a hero that displayed the best parts of humanity. Wall-E is kind, curious, and utterly devoted, not just to EVE but also to his assigned task.

Let’s talk about that task, though, because that’s where the allegory in this film comes to light. Wall-E has spent centuries gathering up garbage, compressing it into cubes, and stacking up those cubes into increasingly elaborate structures. And yet the volume of garbage barely seems to have been dented and the reason for his task (to make the world livable for humans) is long gone, seemingly forever. Why is he doing it? What’s the point? This question is echoed later when we actually arrive on the human ship, the Axiom. On this ship, the surviving humans have their every need catered to by machines, and have turned into fat, sedentary blobs who can barely even walk, let alone show the ability to make a decision on their own. But this is their life, this is all they have ever known, and thus they keep going.

And then there’s the ship itself, controlled by a computer voiced by Sigourney Weaver and cleverly designed to evoke the treacherous HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey. (There’s a unit in my 12th grade English class where I show clips of 2001, and I’m always impressed when a student picks up on the fact that Pixar was doing a shout-out here). The Axiom hides the evidence that Earth may again be capable of sustaining life and tries to keep her charges in outer space. Why? Because it doesn’t seem possible. Because her task is to keep the humans alive, and bringing them to Earth poses too great a risk. While the Axiom computer is ostensibly the movie’s villain she, like HAL 9000, isn’t strictly evil in the way that you think of a villain being evil. She is doing what she believes is best, and her actions are only viewed as villainous because we – as the audience – have personally seen the evidence that she is wrong. 

“If you’re gonna steal, steal from the best.” –Pixar’s official motto.

The point is, Wall-E, the Axiom, and the humans on board have all spent their existence in a state of unbroken trajectory, doing the same thing over and over again for no real purpose. Purpose is not found until they all collide and discover that there is a greater potential in the universe than what they have been experiencing. Again, this is the brilliant message of the film: don’t just keep doing something useless because it’s the way that it’s always been done. Find something better. 

And it actually makes you care about a cockroach. Come on, that’s a damned magic trick.

Finding Nemo is probably my son’s favorite Pixar movie, or at least the one he talks about the most, even pointing out fish at the aquarium we took him to last week and indicating which ones were Nemo and Dory. This movie (directed, like Wall-E, by Andrew Stanton) is about a young fish who is taken away from his overprotective father, captured by a scuba diver and brought to a tank in a dentist’s office. The dad, Marlin (Albert Brooks) teams up with a fish who suffers short-term memory loss (Ellen Degeneres) in a desperate chase across the ocean to bring his boy home. Here’s the remarkable thing about this movie: from the description, it sounds like it would be the story of a child learning to obey his parent and not venture out into dangerous territory. If anything, though, it’s the opposite. Nemo is the title character, but the character arc belongs to his father, Marlin, who has been so protective of Nemo since the catastrophe that took his wife and other children that he has not allowed the child to grow. It’s MARLIN who has to learn the lesson in this movie, that a parent has to be willing to let their child swim on their own eventually. (Like so many movies about parents and children, this hits me totally differently today than it did when it was first released in 2003.)

Then there’s Coco from 2017, a movie I will defend as being the last truly great Pixar film (hopefully just “so far”). Coco is about a young man who dreams of being a musician, but is part of a family that hates music because of how his great-grandfather abandoned the family to chase a musical dream. The boy, Miguel (Anthony Gonzales), winds up trapped in the Land of the Dead, and must gain the blessing of his own ancestors to return home…but they want him to give up music. Like many of Pixar’s best films (especially Toy Story 3), Coco features a brilliant twist that turns the movie on its ear, but ultimately, this story is about the toxicity of anger and how holding on to resentment hurts not only you, but everyone you love. And like Nemo, the idea of letting your children find their own way is very present in the film. Was Pixar even TRYING to make these movies for kids?

The two horsemen of “You gotta let your kids make their own choices.”

I’m not saying that everything Pixar has done since 2017 is awful. Onward was pretty good, and had a good message about family, but it wasn’t groundbreaking the way earlier Pixar films have been. Luca was okay…but when you’re the studio that gave us Wall-E, a movie that’s just “okay” is a huge step backwards. I liked both Soul and Elemental much more than Luca, but again, it felt like Pixar was covering a lot of the same ground that they’ve covered in the past. Then there’s stuff like the Toy Story spinoff Lightyear, ostensibly the movie that Toy Story’s Andy loved so much that he needed the action figure. This movie has pretty much NO emotional framework, being a sci-fi movie about alternate timelines and the military. There’s nothing wrong with any of the elements individually, but not only do they never come together, the conceit that this was the favorite film of an 8-year-old boy is patently absurd. 

But let’s get back to Inside Out, since that’s the film that sent me down this train of thought in the first place. Inside Out is about a young girl named Riley whose family moves from Minnesota to San Francisco, and all the accompanying emotional baggage that comes along with that sort of move. However, the majority of the film is actually set inside of Riley’s head, with those emotions themselves – or rather, anthropomorphic personifications of the emotions – being the stars of the film. Joy (Amy Poehler) has been the de facto leader of Riley’s emotions since birth, but when the trauma of the move hits her, Joy and Sadness (Phillis Smith) get jaunted out of their control room on an odyssey across Riley’s mindscape in an attempt to re-establish her core emotions. 

It’s not a coincidence that the face of Toxic Positivity has the voice of Leslie Knope.

It’s a cute film with cute characters. The animation – like even the worst of Pixar’s movies – is fantastic. But what really elevates this film is the way it so perfectly creates a framework for the struggles of a child dealing with a life-changing event. On her first day at a new school Riley seizes up and the “islands” that represent the parts of her personality begin to break down because she doesn’t know how to deal with the way she feels. Memories that previously had been only associated with Joy begin to be touched by Sadness – memories of friends and places that she had to leave behind, once a source of happiness, are now cause for sorrow as she realizes those places and people are lost. 

The incursion of Sadness into Joy’s memories is, at first, treated as a tragic (almost hostile) act, and Joy is willing to do whatever she has to do to make Riley go back to the way she was. The need for growth in this movie, then, is not ONLY something that Riley has to do, but a vital task for Joy herself. In the climax of the film, when Riley is planning to run away in a quest to return to Minnesota (a task that any terrified parent in the audience will recognize as being both hopeless and life-threateningly dangerous), it is not Joy who saves the day, but Sadness. Allowing for sadness to creep into the older emotions is NECESSARY for Riley to really process what has happened to her, something that Joy has to come to accept. In the end, the message of the film is that it’s impossible to be happy all the time, and that true mental health isn’t possible if you ignore your sadness, but only if you learn how to cope with it.

 Hell of a thesis for a “kids’ movie,” right?

How good is this movie? Real mental health professionals have taken to using it to help younger patients learn how to deal with their emotions. And how many times have you used the term “core memory?” Right? It’s part of the lexicon. But it wasn’t before 2015, because as far as anyone can tell, this is the movie that coined what has become a VERY common term. It’s a film that works PERFECTLY because it takes a process that every human being has to go through at some point in their lives and turns it into a fantasy that we can all understand. 

And yet despite all of that, it’s STILL really funny.

Early Pixar understood that great storytelling is great storytelling whether it’s the parents or the kids watching it. Modern Pixar has sort of lost that thread. I’m hoping that Inside Out 2 will help bring it back. The conceit this time is that Riley is getting older and, as such, her emotions are getting more complex, with the likes of Anxiety, Embarrassment, and Ennui showing up in headquarters for Joy and company to deal with. As someone with his own anxiety struggles, I would be THRILLED if there’s a Pixar movie that can help me figure out how to sort them out.

Pixar: Meet Anxiety!
Me: Thanks, but we’ve been living together since 1987.

But I am, I must admit, nervous. Pete Docter, the co-writer and director of the first film, isn’t involved this time around. Kelsey Mann directs this one, making his feature film debut. What’s more, the only member of the original writing team that’s back is Meg LeFauve, whose only non-Inside Out writing credit for Pixar is The Good Dinosaur, which you may recall as the first Pixar movie to actually flop. I am hoping very sincerely that we get Inside Out LeFauve. 

I am bolstered somewhat by the knowledge that, although Pixar’s feature film division has struggled in recent years, the magic HAS still been there in the form of their shorts. People forget about short film and what a difficult type of storytelling that actually is. I mean, it’s never easy to tell a truly great story, but it’s arguably even harder to do it in five minutes rather than an hour and a half. Go to your Disney+ account and look at some of the recent Pixar shorts like Burrow, Bao, or my personal favorite, Float. They’ve got that old Pixar magic. Last year even gave us the delightful Carl’s Date, a short about the grouchy old man from Up trying to enter a new stage of life. It was wonderful and bite-sized enough not to undercut the original film.

The magic is still there. Pixar just has to figure out how to bring it back to the big screen. I hope with all my heart that Inside Out 2 is the movie that pulls it off.

But if it isn’t, here’s hoping that the spark of Joy riding around in my own head is able to take it in stride.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He didn’t even get around to talking about how The Incredibles is actually the best Fantastic Four movie ever made. Ah well, maybe next time.