154-Deck the Halls With Nerdy Baubles (Falalalala lala lala)

The other day when we decorated our Christmas tree, I opened up a few ornaments I bought weeks ago in preparation for this moment. One of them – it should be no surprise – was a Superman ornament from the new movie, poised to go on the tree in the midst of a half-dozen other Superman ornaments of various types and origin, including one of his s-shield, a LEGO Superman, and Krypto the Superdog, amongst others. The second newbie was from this year’s other great superhero movie, Fantastic Four: First Steps: a figure of my favorite Marvel character Benjamin J. Grimm, the ever-lovin’ blue-eyed Thing. And as I hung it on the tree, I was struck with a bit of a giggle as I realized that here I was, Baptised and confirmed Catholic, placing on my Christmas tree one of the most famously Jewish superheroes that ever existed.

“IT’S CAROLIN’ TIME!”

And I can’t help but think that Stan Lee would find that pretty amusing as well.

Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, Ben’s co-creators, were both Jewish, and although the classic comics never really made it explicit, there were a lot of things about Ben’s dialogue and backstory that coded him as a New York Jew. The comics didn’t deal with religion that much at the time, although by the 80s writers began to feel freer about incorporating religion as part of a character’s background. Kitty Pryde of the X-Men and Marc Spector, Moon Knight, were both marked as Jewish early in their careers, and existing heroes like Nightcrawler (also of the X-Men) and Daredevil had their own Catholic faith emphasized as major aspects of their characterization. The degree to which any character’s particular religious affiliation is relevant tends to wax and wane depending on the writer, but addressing these issues helped make the Marvel Universe as a whole feel more real in a way, as it was no longer ignoring such a major part of culture. All that said, it’s weird that it took 40 years, until the early 2000s, before Marvel published a story that specifically had the Thing make reference to his Jewish heritage.

Since then it’s come up far more often, including an intriguing story by Dan Slott where Ben got a Bar Mitzvah as an adult using the logic that becoming the Thing was sort of a second birth and the 13 years that had elapsed since then (in-universe, that is) allowed for that. I’m no Hebrew scholar so I’ve got no idea if that would fly in real life, but it was a great story all the same. At any rate, I think Stan would be fine with me putting Ben on the same tree as I put the little ornament that commemorated the 50th anniversary of our local Catholic church, the snowman bauble my son made for us in Kindergarten, the Peanuts gang, this weird Nicholas Cage ornament my wife thinks is absolutely hilarious, and the golden Enterprise Hallmark produced for Star Trek’s own 50th anniversary. Whether you yourself are religious or not, I feel like we nerds have embraced the holidays as another way to let our geek flags fly.

Guess which one of these is my wife’s favorite.

Hallmark is not the only company to have embraced this part of our culture, of course, but I feel like they’re probably the most recognizable. Every year, I have friends who eagerly await that moment – usually sometime in July – when Hallmark releases their catalogue of new ornaments that will be available for the holiday season. And there’s never any telling what you’re going to get, there are some things that are pretty reliable. That year’s big movies usually get a few ornaments, and there’s almost always stuff to be added to their collection of Star Wars and Star Trek decorations whether there was a new movie that year or not. And as they continue to milk those properties for every character, vehicle, and scenario they can possibly immortalize, they’ve gotten increasingly elaborate. This year’s offerings include a $100 ornament, full of lights and sound, of the scene in the first Star Wars movie where Chewbacca and R2-D2 are playing holographic chess, complete with an actual hologram function. And while that ornament may fall out of MY price range, I’ve got absolutely no doubt that they sold out.

It’s called “Let the Wookie Win.” “Wookie” is slang for “your desperate need to display your youth on a Douglas Fir.”

But Hallmark doesn’t stop at the usual. A cursory glance at their website reveals that this year’s offerings – in addition to the usual IP from Disney, Marvel, Star Wars, and DC Comics – also include the likes of Sonic the Hedgehog, Harry Potter, an XBox controller, Heinz Ketchup, Shrek, the NFL, Friends, and your favorite seasonal horror movie characters like M3gan, Chucky, and Michael Meyers – specifically from Halloween II. If you simply took every licensed ornament produced by Hallmark in the past two decades and put them on one enormous tree, you could show it to an alien as a perfect capsule summary of western culture in the 21st century. 

It’s not just Christmas trees, of course, but pretty much all aspects of holiday decorating allow for you to show off the kind of stuff that you’re into. We’ve always had Christmas inflatables in our yard, for instance. Over the years, those inflatables have included multiple Star Wars characters, sitting out there right next to the likes of Snoopy, Frosty the Snowman, Bluey, and a shark wearing a Santa hat. (My wife desperately tried to find oversized yellow Christmas light decorations to put behind the shark in an attempt to recreate the scene from Jaws in our yard, but she was unsuccessful before the shark’s motor failed and the inflatable decoration had to be retired. They don’t make ‘em like they used to.)

If you don’t have stuff like this on your lawn are you even really celebrating the birth of our Savior?

In my classroom, I’ve got a collection of geeky knickknacks (mostly – but not all – Superman-related) that I keep near my desk. Around the holidays, though, I break out specialized ones – monsters at Halloween, family groups for Thanksgiving. And now, at Christmas, my collectible display includes multiple DC and Marvel characters in Christmas outfits, Charlie Brown in his snow suit next to Snoopy sleeping on his decorated doghouse, and for a hint of traditionality, Santa Claus and Rudolph. Santa, although, is in New Orleans Saints gear, because we very much use the holidays as an excuse to mash together EVERYTHING we love. 

Harley is winking because she and Deadpool have shenanigans to get up to during my planning period.

And lest we forget, we don’t just decorate our environment, friends. We decorate ourselves. I’ve long prided myself on my collection of nerdy t-shirts, but at Christmas there’s a special subsection that gets broken out with Christmas-themed takes on the Flintstones, the Muppets, the Looney Tunes, Disney characters, and of course, my favorite superheroes. The “Ugly Sweater” trend gives us yet another opportunity to put ourselves on display. You can find designs dedicated to virtually any movie, TV show, or video game you can think of. Last year I broke down and ordered the Svengoolie Christmas sweater, wearing it any time it was cold enough outside to justify it. (I live in Louisiana, of course, so that only happened like twice. But still.) And of course, Santa hats are just one more excuse to customize the holidays. I’ve got a Superman Santa hat I’ve worn for many years, and just this week my wife got one in Harley Quinn colors. My friend Owen Marshall, who I know is reading this right now – hi, buddy! – has a collection of different Santa hats that could occupy an entire section of a Christmas museum. 

Only seven years old in this picture and he’s already looking away from his dad in embarrassment.

A few years ago, my brother introduced me to RSVLTS, a company that makes very cool, comfortable shirts in deliciously nerdy patterns, and those shirts have come to dominate my casual wardrobe. I often hold back on buying their seasonal shirts, as they’re kind of expensive for a shirt I can only wear a month of out of the year, but I eventually acquired a shirt of Mickey and Minnie ice-skating, a great pattern of the characters from Rankin and Bass’s Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and last month my sweet wife got me my favorite Disney character, Scrooge McDuck, on a RSVLTS shirt celebrating his definitive performance as Ebenezer Scrooge from the motion picture Mickey’s Christmas Carol.

Imagine this shirt, but with my head sticking out of it.

RSVLTS does not pay me for my frequent endorsements, but damn it, they should.

The point is, we all celebrate the holidays in our own ways, and that’s as it should be. And one of the things I like about them the most is the opportunity for people to use them to show off who they are. Put out your geekiest ornaments and your nerdiest lawn decorations. Wear your wildest shirts and hats. And let your geek flag fly. Christmas should be a celebration of love, and while that should PRIMARILY be the people we love (you know who you are), I think there’s room in it for the things we love as well.

Blake M. Petit is a writer, teacher, and dad from Ama, Louisiana. His most recent writing project is the superhero adventure series Other People’s Heroes: Little Stars, volume one of which is now available on Amazon. You can subscribe to his newsletter by clicking right here. He’s also started putting his LitReel videos on TikTok. If Santa is listening, he’s still got his eye on that G.I. Joe aircraft carrier. Everybody reading this knows what he’s talking about.